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Cats - Noise Nuisance

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  • Lass
    Lass Posts: 36 Forumite
    Pink Tiger - thanks for your support. Yes, I am stressing about this, to be honest really because I can see this going farther and farther down the line. I know my neighbour honestly doesn't want to move (see below) and that's a valid point you make about selling my property and disclosing neighbour disputes - I do believe that also applies in Scotland, just another thing to trouble me now - who is going to want to buy a flat where the neighbour complains of the noise of my cats? It's going to be pretty obvious to anyone that the sound proofing is non-existent.

    KatP - yes, if you ask me earplugs would be the perfect solution - but I can't suggest that (see below).

    YorkiePud - haha, you evil person! She knows I'm a 'good' neighbour as she's had people from hell living above her previously.....


    Had the meeting this morning, first time I've seen let alone spoken with my neighbour in weeks. Ground rules first off - mediators aren't allowed to make suggestions as they should come from us, the idea being we are more likely to stick to it as we won't suggest something we can't or won't do. Unfortunately, that also meant I wasn't allowed to suggest anything to my neighbour either - such as earplugs! My neighbour made it clear from the outset that she has no other issues with me, that she likes me and that the only issue is the cats. The lack of sleep she is experiencing is causing her ill health (she has seen the doctor repeatedly who has said he will step in with regard to the noise nuisance if need be). She admitted that having spoken with me about it, that I had said I would TRY to resolve it and that she knew it would be difficult. I explained that since being advised of the problem, I had tried a variety of different things - including leaving my eldest cat out until 5am hoping that her energy would be expelled - when I tried that, they started running around when I let her in at 5am and I said that obviously I had been aware of this ..... this information coincided with the 'diary' she has been keeping of the cat noise, so evidences that I was indeed trying something new.

    Unfortunately as far as my neighbour is concerned, there is nothing she can do to resolve the problem, as the problem is my cats and therefore the issue lies with what I can do. This attitude was quite clear in between all the talk about how miserable she is feeling and how wonderful I am as a neighbour :rolleyes:

    I discovered during the course of the meeting that she has been sleeping in the livingroom for 44 years! When she had kids, they had the bedrooms and she slept in the livingroom and has continued to do so. She has tried sleeping in both bedrooms, but cannot, and is troubled by the noise of my cats on the laminate floor in my hall anyway!

    She told us that there was a period of 4 days about 3 weeks ago when she didn't hear them at all. I hadn't been doing anything different, as at that point I wasn't aware there was a problem, so who knows. I mentioned the fact that as winter approaches, my concern is that the eldest cat won't be going out so much and that this may actually make the situation worse, I didn't make any promises I can't keep and bluntly said as much.

    Due to the rules, I couldn't suggest earplugs. So, bottom line, it's all down to me to try to adjust the cats behaviour. I have explained that I have tried some things recently but evidently they didn't work. I have suggested that I could try letting the eldest cat out earlier, and therefore back in earlier, adjusting their pattern that way. I have also offered to act on an online article I saw saying not to feed the cats at night. Essentially 'we' have an agreement whereby I will try one thing at a time, logging what I am trying, for a period of a few days, then check in with my neighbour and see if it has helped. However, I did say that cats behaviour can be unpredictable, as evidenced by the 4 days of quiet, and that I could do nothing to adjust their mood!

    One of the mediators did ask if I can exclude the cats from the livingroom - I explained that to do so would mean them shut in the hallway (small space, laminate flooring) which is less than ideal. Neighbour did actually mention that she has heard them in the hallway.....

    If nothing else, I am trying to keep my self lily-white and evidence that I have tried everything practial, as I really do not think this is going to go away. Or am I just being negative?

    Sorry it's such a long post folks.

    Lass x
  • mrcol1000
    mrcol1000 Posts: 4,796 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts
    Lass wrote: »

    If nothing else, I am trying to keep my self lily-white and evidence that I have tried everything practial, as I really do not think this is going to go away. Or am I just being negative?

    Sorry it's such a long post folks.

    Lass x


    Have you tried contacting your local environmental health department to come and montior the noise and see whever they think there is a problem? As while it must be annoying for her its not neccessary something that any action can be taken on?
    Everytime my neighbours come in his house the door makes a huge bang because its so heavy. While this annoys me it doesn't neccessary mean a nusiance is being caused.
    You may just be better of getting confirmation that its not a noise nusiance, informing your neighbour you will do your best to keep the noise levels down and do that but get on with your life. Some people get obbessed with noise to the point where they stress themselves out listening for noises. Just because you can hear your neighbour in the dead of night doesn't mean they are causing you a nusiance.
  • emlou2009
    emlou2009 Posts: 4,016 Forumite
    what ridiculous rules that you couldnt suggest anything!

    it sounds to me like she is doing her best to be nice about it, but she has already set in her mind that it wont get better unless the cats arent there any more :undecided

    all you can do is co-operate and do as they say i guess. i dont know how you are being so nice about it, she sounds like an interfering old bat to me :o sorry!
    Mummy to
    DS (born March 2009)

    DD (born January 2012)
  • vij
    vij Posts: 254 Forumite
    Cats are cats I dont envy your situation ours play chase all night and they are happy kitties.

    Have you tried cat nip in bubbles, treats or toys to distract them from each other?
  • newlywed
    newlywed Posts: 8,255 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Name Dropper
    edited 15 October 2009 at 4:25PM
    I knew someone who saw a homeopath vet who suggested a very small dose of rescue remedy stuff for her hyper and nervous cat. I wouldn't recommend actually doing it without someone actually letting you know what a safe dose is though, but she said it calmed her cat.


    Ok just had to google to check I don't sound completely mad!!!
    http://www.cpnewcastle.co.uk/bachflowerremedies.htm
    http://bachrescueremedy.net/rescue-remedy-for-dogs-and-cats/.php
    http://www.pets.ca/forum/showthread.php?t=13775
    working on clearing the clutterDo I want the stuff or the space?
  • Lass
    Lass Posts: 36 Forumite
    I haven't been in touch with environmental health as I'm not quite sure where I stand with that - they'd have to be monitoring the noise in my neighbours flat so I'm not sure that I can interfere with that process as such. My worry is, after researching online, that apparently disturbance such as this doesn't come down to decibel level, but can be determined as a nuisance by the environmental health officer at his or her personal discretion.

    From a couple of comments made by my neighbour at the meeting, it is clear that she has been doing her own digging and investigating, and I can guarantee from what she said that she knows precisely where all this will head if not resolved.

    Vij- the problem of the cats activity arises when I'm safely tucked up in bed, so I'm not in a position to distract them from each other.

    Emlou - several people have told me that I'm being far too nice about it and that I should ignore her (not quite the words used, but you get the gist!) but I'm sorry to say it's just not me, I'm cursed with a heavy dose of empathy and right now it's pulling me in far too many directions.

    A lot of people have suggested the same type of thing as newlywed did - with a variety of different remedies etc being mentioned. Whilst I am willing to try to resolve the situation, I can't believe it's going to come down to doping my cats - I'm sorry, but even if it's a completely natural substance, that's essentially what I'm doing!

    To end on a rather ironic note, in the midst of my research I came across the Scottish governments paper on animal cruelty. Apparently as a pet owner, you not only must feed etc your animal, but you must allow it to EXHIBIT NATURAL BEHAVIOUR! Ha ha.

    Lass x
  • Why not suggest ear plugs outside of the mediation. You could buy a set, they aren't expensive, and write a kind little note saying how worried you are about all this and how awful it must be for her to have her sleep disturbed, and that you were talking to a friend about the problem and they said that they had used these ear plugs successfully when their nextdoor neighbour had a small baby with colic that kept them awake and you thought it might be worth her trying them.

    It doesn't matter that it is a lie, but is suggests something that could be a very workable solution and also plants the seed that some noise 'nuisence' is completely unavoidable and that you are a good neighbour.

    I think that she has got herself so wound up about this that she has become over sensitive to noise.

    In the meantime could you get an extra layer of underlay under your carpet? It might help insulate the noise a bit more. Especially if your carpet is a bit old the underlay may not be great or it might have got worn and compressed. It would help keep your flat warm so would benefit you too.
  • Fire_Fox
    Fire_Fox Posts: 26,026 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    edited 16 October 2009 at 11:03AM
    Your neighbour has let the cat out of the bag so to speak. She has admitted she has sought treatment from her GP, she has admitted she cannot sleep in either bedroom - this is nothing to do with your cats, she is an insomniac!! If your neighbour attempts to take this further you can state that the problem is a combination of her sleep disorder and poor sound insulation.

    I also struggle with insomnia and have used wax earplugs with excellent results, as have both my parents after I introduced them - so much so that my dad placed an 'order' with me last time I went to visit them!! Buy your neighbour some and post through the letterbox; the more widely available foam earplugs are next to useless and uncomfortable to wear. I used to buy wax earplugs from Superdrug, but you may have to ask at the pharmacy.
    Declutterbug-in-progress.⭐️⭐️⭐️ ⭐️⭐️
  • Lass
    Lass Posts: 36 Forumite
    KatP - I totally agree, she as much as admitted that when she goes to bed she lies there waiting to see if the cats are going to start up. Let's face it, I guess we'd all be the same if being disturbed by noise.... Funny thing about your suggestion re the carpets - the livingroom carpet is the one that I inherited when I bought the house 6 years ago. It's very, very VERY thick and was obviously of such good quality that I've left it there. During the mediation meeting, I mentioned this as the question was posed as to whether I had laminate. My neighbour actually remembered the carpet and said that she knew how thick it was and that the previous people had had it imported from Italy, I think she was a bit shocked to find that with that particular carpet there she was being troubled so much by the noise. We've been talking about doing up the livingroom, which includes changing the carpet, but now I'm a bit worried as I doubt we could afford to replace it with one of such quality.

    FireFox - I hear what you're saying about insomnia, but she is maintaining that her lack of sleep issues are being caused by the noise from my cats! So regardless that she has spoken with her doctor, she is saying that she has been to see him because of sleep deprivation caused by us. It might be worth me broaching the subject of earplugs with her, even if I sort of suggest that it be a temporary measure until we see if what I am doing is changing my cats' behaviour.

    Lass x
  • Fire_Fox
    Fire_Fox Posts: 26,026 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    edited 16 October 2009 at 4:01PM
    Lass wrote: »
    FireFox - I hear what you're saying about insomnia, but she is maintaining that her lack of sleep issues are being caused by the noise from my cats! So regardless that she has spoken with her doctor, she is saying that she has been to see him because of sleep deprivation caused by us. It might be worth me broaching the subject of earplugs with her, even if I sort of suggest that it be a temporary measure until we see if what I am doing is changing my cats' behaviour.

    Lass x

    So what is your neighbour's excuse for being unable to sleep in either of the bedrooms?? Answer: insomnia. :confused: By choosing to sleep in the living room is your neighbour accepting she sleeps better (not well) than she does in either of the bedrooms? If so how is it your cats that are responsible for disturbing her sleep? There is no logic to these assertions.

    Insomnia is caused by chemical imbalances in the brain and perhaps exacerbated by noise (certainly mine is). I reckon that is a valid argument if she tries to take this ridiculous case any further - I'd certainly ask for a report from her GP as to the root cause of her inability to sleep. Insomnia can be a living hell, your neighbour probably isn't able to think rationally about this.

    I agree that you need to approach the earplugs thing sensitively; I'd say you have been worried about her and confided in a friend who raved about wax earplugs. Many insomniacs have tried (unsuccessfully) foam earplugs, but often haven't heard of or tried wax ones. They are a bit strange at first as they come as a hard lump, but soften to fit the ear perfectly with body heat. I used to forget they were in and wonder why I was deaf in the mornings! :p
    Declutterbug-in-progress.⭐️⭐️⭐️ ⭐️⭐️
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