What sort of rent do people charge 18-25 year old children

silvercar

I'm puzzled by people trading down and moaning about having to buy a home big enough to accommodate their children. When you had children you knew that there was not an automatic rule that they left home the minute they became adults. Your children are human beings, some people seem to think you can treat them like birds and push them out of the nest the minute they can fly. Unfair to blame your children for having to buy a place big enough to accommodate them, when you are trading down too early for your family circumstances.

This generation are encouraged to go to university and saddle themselves with large debts, whereas the previous generation (me included) had the benefit of no tuition fees, maintenance grants and decent jobs for those who left education earlier. Whereas it might have been possible decades ago to fund yourself from 18, nowadays our children need support for longer.

Jowo_2

I can understand your viewpoint, Silvercar, but this thread is littered with examples by posters who maintain the benefit of encouraging budgeting by their children and examples of abuses of hospitality where the children are squandering their income rather than preparing for an independent future and take advantage of their parents. Meanwhile, there are also threads here from people who are proud to contribute as much as they can to the household kitty.

Currently the OP hasn't provided enough evidence as to whether his son, who pays £46 per week in one of the most expensive cities in the UK to live in, has any idea how much the true (i.e. non parentally subsidised) cost of living is and if he has any University debts to factor in.

Parents are free to invite their children to leave at the age of 16...

edgex

silvercar wrote: »

I'm puzzled by people trading down and moaning about having to buy a home big enough to accommodate their children. When you had children you knew that there was not an automatic rule that they left home the minute they became adults. Your children are human beings, some people seem to think you can treat them like birds and push them out of the nest the minute they can fly. Unfair to blame your children for having to buy a place big enough to accommodate them, when you are trading down too early for your family circumstances.

This generation are encouraged to go to university and saddle themselves with large debts, whereas the previous generation (me included) had the benefit of no tuition fees, maintenance grants and decent jobs for those who left education earlier. Whereas it might have been possible decades ago to fund yourself from 18, nowadays our children need support for longer.

Jowo wrote: »

I can understand your viewpoint, Silvercar, but this thread is littered with examples by posters who maintain the benefit of encouraging budgeting by their children and examples of abuses of hospitality where the children are squandering their income rather than preparing for an independent future and take advantage of their parents. Meanwhile, there are also threads here from people who are proud to contribute as much as they can to the household kitty.

Currently the OP hasn't provided enough evidence as to whether his son, who pays £46 per week in one of the most expensive cities in the UK to live in, has any idea how much the true (i.e. non parentally subsidised) cost of living is and if he has any University debts to factor in.

Parents are free to invite their children to leave at the age of 16...

would they be willing to pay their child, in cash, the difference between house price inflation & general inflation over that 16 year period?


the generation that is currently the biggest owner of property, & the ones that took advantage of raising property prices, & got into the BTL market, & are now looking to cash out, downsize & make a profit, have to take responsibility for the situation they have created.
if your children cant afford to move out, & so have to stay at home, you dont have any right to moan about it. youve created that situation, tough!

charge a rent, thats fine, but you cant go basing that on supposed 'market' rent.
as i said before, get them to furnish their own room, that at least gives them something that is 'theirs'

mlz1413

OP I would charge your son the increase and more, he has lived for 3 yrs on the same rent and then complained about a £50 increase - time he got into the real world!

I realise parents have split opinions on charging rent, but you are his parent and you have decided to charge him to live there you still do everything for him the same as when he was at school, that is more than fair for him.

I always paid rent of around 1/3 of my take home pay and I wanted to, it meant a lot to me to pay towards the household as I became an adult. My sister used to pay rent and then borrow it all back which I think made her less responsible with money.

Sweetcaz_2

I would say it was very responsible for you as their parent to actually give them a choice given the circumstances, sounds like the father maybe was not so duty bound!

poppysarah

Do those parents who are aware of the fact their kids can't buy their own home put it down to them not earning enough or house prices being too high?

muppet83

My parents used to charge me £250 a month rent, and I was more than happy to pay. However while I was saving and being sensible wiht my money they put £100 of that into a bank account for me.
This encouraged me to save and showed me how fast my money could grow with a bit of common sense.

Kids should pay their way having an easy ride will do them no favours in the long run.

jackieb

poppysarah wrote: »

Do those parents who are aware of the fact their kids can't buy their own home put it down to them not earning enough or house prices being too high?

My son's apprenticeship has finished but he's still a trainee so not on full pay for another year or so. He's currently making £42k (it goes up in stages), but it was only 4 years ago he was getting just over £300 a month (plus free board and lodgings while he was away at college through the week). He could afford a mortgage right now. He just wants as big a deposit as he can. Hopefully he'll buy next year. As i've said he's saving like mad (to the point of being stingy!) If he wasn't saving so much i'd definitely be charging him more just as an incentive for him to move out!

We moved house last year. We decorated and carpeted his room, but he's bought his own bed and furniture.

edgex

Surbybird wrote: »

My children are 19 and 22 so they are adults, rather than children, and the trading down wasn't my choice.

Until earlier this year we were living in a large house which I'd shared with my partner until our relationship broke down. He then, not unsurprisingly, wanted to cut the ties as he was in a new relationship and the girlfriend was pressuring him to get me out. Therefore I had 2 choices - buy him out and stay where I was or let him buy me out and move. I couldn't afford to buy him out so he bought me out instead.

I had little choice but to downsize because that's all I could afford to do. I also had to move 30 miles away because house prices where we used to live were out of my reach on a single salary.

As a result, I am now burdened with a much larger mortgage than I had before and I'll be paying it off until I am 65! I could have told both daughters to find their own places and bought myself a little house somewhere and cleared my mortgage off in a few years, but I didn't. I chose to saddle myself with a huge pile of debt so that they could live a cheap and cushy life at home instead.

So what part of that is being unfair to them?

er, i dont really think they would have found places to live.
the older one possibly, but a 19yr old? even a full-time wage for someone that age is not going to enable them to move out.


bit late now, but had you looked into whether you could have had a joint mortgage with the older one?
or just say to her, there is an issue with finances, could she afford to pay 1/3 of the mortgage each month.


i dont see why they have to 'live a cheap and cushy life at home instead'
surely they could take turns cooking & cleaning, even if its just twice a week, thats 4 evenings you wouldnt have to cook.



i dont think people are saying that what you are doing is unfair
its just pointing out, in general, the realities of 'moving out'

the idea that children would move out when their 16/18, or even 20, is quite simply no longer realistic.

edgex

jackieb wrote: »

My son's apprenticeship has finished but he's still a trainee so not on full pay for another year or so. He's currently making £42k (it goes up in stages), but it was only 4 years ago he was getting just over £300 a month (plus free board and lodgings while he was away at college through the week). He could afford a mortgage right now. He just wants as big a deposit as he can. Hopefully he'll buy next year. As i've said he's saving like mad (to the point of being stingy!) If he wasn't saving so much i'd definitely be charging him more just as an incentive for him to move out!

We moved house last year. We decorated and carpeted his room, but he's bought his own bed and furniture.

which makes sense
he now actually has something which is his own, & he can take with him.


£42k as a trainee :eek: