Hello!

Moneytroubles_2

Hi everyone, I originally signed up sometime ago, and really got stuck into the whole become debt free thing, however at the same time i was trying to save for my wedding so it was really hard!

Unfortunately due to the stress of everything we have now cancelled our wedding which was due to be next month, so i feel i can properly start again!

I'm just feeling really down at the moment as I used to be so good with money and now I seem stuck in a rut.

My partner is terrible with money, and is always missing payments, im really angry at him at the moment as he ordered things out of a catalogue which is in my name yet he's missing the repayments, even though i constantly remind him and this is affecting my credit rating, we also have a joint loan and the payments have been missed here too.

Its just hit home how bad my situation is as ive just applied for a student account as im going back to uni next month and been declined

How can i begin to improve my credit rating?

Thanks for reading!

WASHER

Welcome back to MSE.

You could set up a direct debit for the catalogue, which means no missed payments.

Could you post an SOA (a list of incomings and outgoings) and we will see if we can reduce your monthly outgoings.

Its really difficult sometimes to get your OH on board, it took me 15 years to retrain my husband regarding his spending habits, don't nag him, that will not work and he may spend more. How about you taking over the finances and giving him cash spends each month?

If your OH can see how much you owe and with the advice and knowledge of the peeps on this board, maybe a solution, he may, may just come round to the fact he can't keep spending and needs to tighten his belt a wee bit.

WASHER

Moneytroubles_2

Thanks for the advice, I am slowly taking over all our finances but it is difficult as other half just seems oblivious!

The other day I told him I was going to save for a new car (eventually) as my current car is on finance which ends next year and i dont really want to take out more finance over the next few years and his attitude was..

"just take the car into a garage for part exchange and take out another car loan" i explained to him that I didnt want to do this as I wanted to be debt free to which he replied "no one is debt free, its just a way of life!"

He really makes me angry! I've just opened a savings account which he is not aware of, and I have £25 each month going into that, im also getting a student loan which I am going to put in my savings account! so hopefully it will create some nice interest!

Just need to take it all one day at a time!

WASHER

Moneytroubles wrote: »

his attitude was..

"just take the car into a garage for part exchange and take out another car loan" i explained to him that I didnt want to do this as I wanted to be debt free to which he replied "no one is debt free, its just a way of life!"

You can tell your OH he is wrong, I'm debt free and have been for a few years (it took some doing though). Their is nothing wrong with good debt (mortgage etc) but if you are struggling to make ends meet, then it can cause all sorts of problems, it almost ruined my marriage at the time.

Your OH will have his lightbulb moment, maybe not tomorrow or next week, but it will happen when things get really tight and no available credit.

How did your OH order stuff from your catalogue? Online? If so change the password then he can't do it again. If he really can't control his spending/finances, then joint loans/bank accounts are not a great idea.

WASHER

http://www.moneymadeclear.fsa.gov.uk/HTML/en/products/bank_accounts/basic_bank_accounts_popup.htm

The above is a link to basic bank accounts, they are for people with poor credit ratings. MAKE SURE THE BANK YOU CHOSE HASN'T GOT ANY LINKS TO YOUR CURRENT BANK ACCOUNT. (especially if you have a loan or an overdraft with them)

Moneytroubles_2

Well Done WASHER! any tips you have would be greatly appreciated!

Ive changed my catalogue password now, and I'm thinking of taking is card off him, we did this a couple of years ago, and i gave him "spends" each week and it really did work, however he works away now during the week so argues that he needs his card?

Im just so impatient and want one of the debts gone so i can get that fuzzy feeling! the first im gonna go for is my overdraft on my old account, i know people say go for the highest interest but this is my smallest debt (just under £400) so i wanna get it out the way! sounds selfish but im working on paying my own debts off first, i will offer OH advice but i wont actively get involved in his until my overdraft and catalogue are paid off!

WASHER

If he really insists on having a card, O2 (mobile phone company) offer a free moneycard with no fees (its a load and go card, you load it with a sum of money and you cannot overspend on it, you have to be an o2 customer though, but other people offer these prepay cards, I think some do charge) and you can use them just like a debit card, but the great thing is, if you haven't got the cash on the card, you can't overspend. I have one and I find it great to have my monthly spends money on there..once its gone its gone, it enables me to budget better.

Oh and I recommend a spending diary, I have an Excel sheet which I update everyday (sad, I need to get out more) and that really controls my spending.

My tip to you, if you can live without it.i.e sky/mobile/car etc, then get rid, it will enable you to repay your debts sooner. Its amazing how much stuff we don't actually need.

I too wouldn't get involved with repaying your oh debts either, he needs to have his lightbulb moment and when he does you can show him the right road to take.

Brussel_Sprout

Hi Troubles,

Some sound advice from Washer!! How lucky to be debtfree!

Has your OH ever seen this board? It's good that you realise that your debts need to be paid off, I knew mine did but I kept ignoring them (much like your OH) it then got out of control and escalated to £36K!!

Separate your debts out, make it clear to him what his debts are and tell him that you will not be responsible for them - might sound harsh but if he has to deal with the overdue payment letters etc. then he might finally realise! He is a grown man and if he can't manage his own money and budget then.......????!!

This might sound harsh, but I speak from the darkest depths of debt, my life is on hold, I can't get married, or have children yet as I simply can't afford it. I cant afford a new car, or to go on holiday, or to get my hair cut/highlighted, buy a new outfit, new shoes, go out and just spend money on a night out, ,EVERYTHING has to be budgeted for. It's not all as bad as a I make it sound but it can be and it's a place I wouldn't wish on anyone.

You don't need a student account just a regular bank account, unless of course you want a free rail card or something! Also be aware that there are hardship funds at universities that you can apply for to supplement you rliving/food/course fees, look into that if you get stuck.

Oh and good luck - sorry if I've put a downer so early in the morning!!

Moneytroubles_2

Morning! Thanks for your input Brussel Sprout, and well done on your reduced debts! The only reason I initially wanted to the student account was cos you got 0% interest on the overdraft, and a friend of mine has recently withdrew money from the overdraft and put it in a high interest ISA, which I thought was a good idea, but obviously not for me at this time!

Im gonna have a big ebay sesh soon, unfortunately due to wedding being cancelled that means I have shoes, a tiara, a veil, a wedding dress etc that needs rehoming

I think i may show OH this forum cos personally i think he lives in a dream world, we dont have SKY but he says he wants it, which so far i've managed to discourage, I just dont see the need when freeview now offers so many channels?

My biggest problem at the moment is my phone! I have an Iphone and me and OH both went over our contracts, however they have a new app now where you can check how many of your free minutes and texts you have left so gonna download that!

MT X

WASHER

I know O2 do this, so I'd have thought other mobile companies do it as well. If I txt free 21202 O2 send me a free txt stating how many talk mins and how many txts I have left out of my "free allowance".

You could also check online, again O2 and T Mobile as I know of offer this facility, it enables you to keep an eye on those free mins.

I know all this takes time, but it can really keep you within your "free contract mins".

misspoppy

HI

You could open up a seperate bank account for your OH and put in his pocket money each week and when its gone its gone, theres no need for him to have a credit version when a bank account will do. I can recomend the co-op but they aren't fully up to speed with faster payments yet so if he was stranded with no money you would only be able to give him extra by paying it in at a branch or post office.

Have you drawn up a SOA and shown it to him would that be awake up call? You can easily get around the sky conversation because if he's away all week he can't watch it so its a waste of money.