For those having/had a registry off wedding...

Missk_3

What happens?

im getting really worried now as when we booked all that happened was the guy took our money, told us our dates, did our forms and pretty much said see you on the day.

with less than 4 weeks to go im getting very upset as i dont know what happens - i know our guests are to arrive 10 mins early. But thats as far as it goes.

No one has told us what we do about music - do i burn the music onto CD's and get the best man to give them to them? Do i have to inform them of my choices?

and then theres the whole - walking in - even though its reg office i very much still want my dad to walk me in and to make my little entrance - but then i have heard we have to see registra b4 and sign some documents or somethin? In that case - will my groom see me b4??

sorry for the essay - but how can they be so dis-organised and not inform us of these things?
really really stressed

rachfriar78

Hi MissK,

Don't be getting all worked up over things honey, please ring them up and just explain your concerns and hopefully they will put your mind at rest.

We are gettting married in 9 weeks at a registery office and the guy we saw was brilliant, really put my mind at ease, also gave me a form to fill in to bring back approx 2 weeks before the wedding.

The form goes through the ceremony and we have got an option or what vows we want to say, if we are giving rings to each other, how many bridesmaids, pagesboys, if the bride and groom are coming together or seperately. We also have an option in what songs we want, need to pick 3 for quests coming in, 1 for me and 3 more for the register signing. We need to put them onto cd and take them in again afew weeks before just to double check that they play on their system.

My partner and I have opted to go in seprately, he is due to arrive 20mins before me, will sign the documents etc then will go to the room the wedding is taking place in. I will then be coming in at 10 to, sign papperwork etc! My little boys will be giving me away, 1 on either arm.

HTH x

Missk_3

See, i cant understand why we havent been told any of this - do they not all work from the same book?
Thank you for your reply - am going to email them today as struggle to make calls at work.
I think i am disgusted at their laid backness.
Sounds like you have had a dream experience...xx

rachfriar78

I would presume that they all work off the same set of rules but I'm not too sure. Defo get in touch with them, email might be a better idea as you will have a hard copy to fall back on. I wouldn't be happy either, it's nerve wracking enough without having added worry!

We were very very lucky to have the chap we did, put us at ease straight away.

Really hope you get it sorted nad have an amazing wedding! xx

ZiggyStardust_2

Hi Miss K,

I got married in a registry office a few months ago. We chose to walk in to the room together and also went in together to sort the documents before hand. We were told to have 3 songs- one for the waiting guests, one to walk into the room and one to leave the room (although they managed to get some of it wrong!;)) Ours was a very simple straight forward ceremony- we didn't have any readings just the basic vows. This perhaps would have made it more special for some; they gave us a book of optional readings and also said if we wanted another poem read to drop it in to them a week before and they could read it or, of course, a member of you family. Have you though about this?

ZiggyStardust

Missk_3

a poem??
see - we were never told about this either - what a joke
im going to send thema very long detailed email stating how dissapointed i am - the main part of the day and its the bit thats not even organised lol typical x

rachfriar78

K, we got told we could have poems or readings as well, just not religious ones. 1 before the actual vows and 1 after, we have to supply a copy of it and who would be reading it but have opted against it. Which area/town are you getting married in?

Snuggles

Missk wrote: »

a poem??
see - we were never told about this either - what a joke
im going to send thema very long detailed email stating how dissapointed i am - the main part of the day and its the bit thats not even organised lol typical x

MissK, I can understand your concern, as I'll be booking our wedding date with the registrar soon, and I too have no idea what is supposed to happen, so know I will be relying on them to advise me.

However, remember this is the person who will be marrying you, and whose help you will need on the day to ensure it all goes smoothly. With that in mind, it might be a good idea to try not to let your frustration and worry colour your email. Just keep it calm, tell them you're concerned you don't know what will happen on the day or what you're supposed to do, and ask them to advise. Hope you get it sorted x

svjenni

i agree with the above - you are also much better calling - i suspect you may have been missed out or something. Every time i have rang my office, and the one i registered at they have been very helpful and are well versed in how it all works - even if they are not the registrar - they have probly heard any question you could throw at them before so give them a call!

I got sent some forms saying return a week before the wedding but there is no way i'll be doing that - i'm planning on making an appointment to discuss how everything will work a month before and give them the forms then. - I know my sister did this so its possible.

Tigerlilley1980

I got given a form that we have to return 6 weeks before the wedding so they can check our song choices, and also who the witnesses are, how many guests, if there are any readings etc!!

I would just ring them and keep ringing until you get through.

We have been told to put the music on one cd in the order that they have to be played.

Tigerxxx

joolesw1972

We were given info by the registry office - they sent us a little certificate with our names, date & time on, info on the payment due, a booklet with loads of info in about the services the registry offer & licenced venues, a book of suggested readings & music, an outline of what services you can choose Bronze (basic), Silver (with a couple of readings), Gold (with a 'giving away', readings etc), or you could pay a little more & have a completely bespoke service, written by you with the help of the registrar & lasting up to an hour & a half! We chose the silver. They advised us to make contact in the few weeks before the ceremony to talk to them of our choice of readings & music as they have to approve them first. We're going to make an appt & go over as I'd prefer to see them in person than do it by e-mail/phone.Did you get any info when you registered? Ours was posted to us, but I don't know if that's because we live in a different registration district to the one we're having our venue in? I'd ring/e-mail & ask for some information, it may be that it got missed or lost in the post, I'm sure they'll be happy to help.