Do you think I can afford another child ?

lizodonnell

I have been reading this site for about six months now, but never really felt the need to post on here as my questions always seemed to have already been put on here by other people ! I have two children and we had always decided that a boy and a girl was fine and we were happy with just two children. My husband keeps mumbling now about how a baby would be nice around the house. My son is 11 and passed his 11+ in March, so he starts grammar school in September, which will cost us an average of £170 extra per month. My little girl is 4 in October so just misses out on school. Her nursery fees are £242 currently per month, because she has just started getting her nursery grant. My husband has a reasonably well paid job and I earn an average wage although I only work 9-3. I just don’t know if we can afford another baby. We don’t get any tax credits or anything at the moment and I am not sure what we would be entitled to if I decided to take time out to have another baby. Our outgoings are quite high, although we have no debts. Our mortgage is £800 alone.

It’s a big big decision to make, and I am 30 in November so I don’t really want to leave it any later – it’s a bit now or never !!

Does anyone who has managed to get to the end of this post have any ideas how I can make this decision. I think its mainly money that needs to be considered, although I am quite unpleasant to live with when I am pregnant !

Thanks All

Liz x

ms_london

You need to sit down & work out if you can afford it.

Could you downsize to a smaller house? Could you get a lodger in? Could you bring any more money in or reduce your current outgoings? Would you be able to afford to live on one wage whilst you are on maternity leave? What about when the baby is born? Does your son have to go to a Grammar School?

Perhaps post a SOA (statement of affairs) - or prepare one for yourself and sit down with your OH and seriously talk about if you can afford one or not. You obviously both want another baby so it seems a shame if it's just the money thats stopping you but you need to be realistic. I dont think that 30 is too old or that you're past it so I wouldnt worry about that. Remember you'll also get the extra child allowance. If you gave up work would you be entitled to more benefits/tax credits etc?

xx

Rachie_B

if you go onto the tax credits site im sure theres a calculator where you can input all your info and it will tell you how much you would be entitled to if you stopped work and was a SAHM,would get maternity pay too ??

TBH having a baby can be as cheap or as expensive as you make it

if you buy most things 2nd hand / borrow from friends / breastfeed etc then obviously thats much cheaper than if you wanted everything brand new !!

do you have any baby equipment left over from your little one?

you say your outgoings are quite high,could they be tweaked a bit to bring them down?

maybe sacrifice some things ???

lizodonnell

We have a few bits and pieces left over. But SIL is pregnant and they are very short of money – we have already offered them everything, and couldn’t really take it back from them as they need it more than we do.

I do have an SOA, so I will paste that over. We cant really afford to downsize our house, its only 3 bedrooms which we would certainly need and because we are tied into a fixed mortgage we would end up with hardly anything !!

Who to Amount
Alliance and Leicester (Mortgage) 795
B’ham City Council (Council Tax) 116
Broadband and Phone (Wanadoo) 20
BT (Line Rental) 12
Bus Pass (Danny) 29
Legal and General (House Insurance) 17
Legal and General (Life Insurance) 54
Swift Insurance (Liz) 32
Car Insurance (Jed) 60
Nursery (Leah) 25
O2 (Danny) 20
Powergen (Gas and Electric) 80
Severn Trent (Water Rates) 23
Sky Digital 42
Smartcard (Danny) 50
Specsavers (Contact Lenses) 22
TV Licence 11
Vodafone (Liz) 40
Washer Dryer (Until 3 August 2006) 80
1528


Danny’s Pocket Money 20

Straight From Lizs Wages
Nursery 217
Sharesave 75
Futuremedia Computer 19
311

Savings
Leah 20
Danny 20
Premium Bonds 200
Danny’s School Savings 50
290


TOTAL 2149
AMOUNT FOR J/A 1838

My husband picks up an average of £2500 and I pick up £1000, so we would lose quite a bit of money if i were to become a SAHM.

its all gone a bit funny - i tried to copy and paste my table, hope its legible !!

Thing is, i dont know if i even want one, money is the main issue but my children will both be at school soon so i would have more time to myself, the flip side of that is that i would also have more time to be at home and lavish attention on the new baby.

its a veritable minefield !!

Am very grateful just to have people to mull it over with who are looking at the situation a lot more impartially !!

Thanks x

PS - Ms_London - Its not a fee paying grammar school - thats just how much more it seems to cost to send the little blighter to secondary school !! - it takes into account savings of £50 a month for him too, so that he can go on all the school trips, they do odd things like mountain climbing in tibet !!

bonnie_2

i think your spending too much on the kids, if your paying £29 on his bus fares and £50 on school savings. then 20 on his phone and 50 on a smart card and 20 in savings that is way too much on one child. that is £179, in a month.
also sky at £42 and vodafone at £40 these are non essentials.
how much do you spend on food and petrol car tax etc.
i think you could do it my hubby only takes home £241 a week and i have 3 children and am a sahm they dont go without anything either.

Broken_hearted

Have you kept all the baby stuff off the older ones, that would save you a fortune.

lesleyk_2

If you had another baby, you would manage financially, but it sounds to me like you aren't really sure that's what you want. I think if you were sure, you'd just go ahead and have the baby and not worry so much about whether you're making the right decision.

You could always just make a decision NOT to think about having a baby for a couple of months, and just get on with enjoying the life you already have, and then come back to it feeling less fraught and see how you feel then?

Good luck whatever.

Rachie_B

god i agree,hes only just 11 and you spend / will spend a lot on him !!
could you cut down on the sky package?
contact lenses ,dont know which ones you have but https://www.tesco.com offer lenses much cheaper

ive not gone with them yet , i only pay £10 a month for monthly disposables with specsavers


whats you weekly / monthy shopping bill at ?

Rachie_B

lizodonnell wrote:

We have a few bits and pieces left over. But SIL is pregnant and they are very short of money – we have already offered them everything, and couldn’t really take it back from them as they need it more than we do.

I do have an SOA, so I will paste that over. We cant really afford to downsize our house, its only 3 bedrooms which we would certainly need and because we are tied into a fixed mortgage we would end up with hardly anything !!

Who to Amount
Alliance and Leicester (Mortgage) 795
B’ham City Council (Council Tax) 116
Broadband and Phone (Wanadoo) 20
BT (Line Rental) 12
Bus Pass (Danny) 29
Legal and General (House Insurance) 17
Legal and General (Life Insurance) 54
Swift Insurance (Liz) 32
Car Insurance (Jed) 60
Nursery (Leah) 25
O2 (Danny) 20
Powergen (Gas and Electric) 80
Severn Trent (Water Rates) 23
Sky Digital 42
Smartcard (Danny) 50
Specsavers (Contact Lenses) 22
TV Licence 11
Vodafone (Liz) 40
Washer Dryer (Until 3 August 2006) 80
1528


Danny’s Pocket Money 20

Straight From Lizs Wages
Nursery 217
Sharesave 75
Futuremedia Computer 19
311

Savings
Leah 20
Danny 20
Premium Bonds 200
Danny’s School Savings 50
290


TOTAL 2149
AMOUNT FOR J/A 1838

My husband picks up an average of £2500 and I pick up £1000, so we would lose quite a bit of money if i were to become a SAHM.

its all gone a bit funny - i tried to copy and paste my table, hope its legible !!

Thing is, i dont know if i even want one, money is the main issue but my children will both be at school soon so i would have more time to myself, the flip side of that is that i would also have more time to be at home and lavish attention on the new baby.

its a veritable minefield !!

Am very grateful just to have people to mull it over with who are looking at the situation a lot more impartially !!

Thanks x

PS - Ms_London - Its not a fee paying grammar school - thats just how much more it seems to cost to send the little blighter to secondary school !! - it takes into account savings of £50 a month for him too, so that he can go on all the school trips, they do odd things like mountain climbing in tibet !!

ooh i missed this bit :rolleyes:

if i were you id concentrate on trying to cut down the outgoings, then IF you decide you do want another baby you will be prepared and maybe have a lil bit of savings to buy equipment etc

you may find that you cant / arent prepared to cut back

Spendless

this is the tax credit website where you can have a play about with figures www.entitledto.co.uk

If you did have a 3rd child would you wish to be a SAHM or would you work? If you don't get help with childcare via tax credits does either employer offer childcare vouchers. They can be a big saving esp if one of you is a 40% tax payer. If you're not using them already for your 4 year old look into doing so.

You can have quite a high income and still get what is called the family element of tax credits which is roughly £10 a week and an additional £10 a week for a newborn until their 1st birthday.

lizodonnell

Hi again,

Our weekly shop is roughly £50 for the 4 of us at the moment, and we get child benefit paid into a separate account that every now and again we cash in and spend on premium bonds, so we have about £1k saved, and could probably get that up to 3 before (if) the baby. I do get childcare vouchers from my work for my little one, and i dont pay childcare for the bigger one. I dont think i could be a SAHM, I need a bit more stimulation than that, I admire moms that can, but its not really me. Ideally i would work two or three days a week - just until 3 again so i could pick my little girl up from school. I did this with my little one until she was about 2 and a half, but i do every day until 3 now, so we would definitely need to cut back. I just dont like thinking that my husband works so hard to give the kids everything they could ever want - and it seems selfish to have another one to take away that chance, a thousand pound a month is a lot of money if i ever decided i couldnt go back to work. which there is a big chance this could happen when i would be coping with two children under 5 i imagine i would be less inclined to want to go to work as well. Also i have just started training to be an accountant, and although i would intend to keep this up it would be so much harder with a tiny baby and so much less sleep !! The thing is, i think i would love another baby, i was even told by a fortune teller that I would have one, but our life is good at the moment, and i cant help thinking "why rock the boat"?

Getting more confused as i waffle on Liz x