Help for a Disabled Parent

ShaShaSha

I have recently become a single Mum, due to domestic violence.

Although I have some adaptations to allow me to care for my daughter, due to my disability - there are some things my partner used to do that I cannot. I recieve DLA & IB, and I use a wheelchair for any walking distances outside the home, and on some days within the home.

I have read on the Direct.gov website that I can ask social services to assess me and if they say I need help, can provide help or issue direct payments for me to pay for the help myself.

Im wondering if anyone can give me more info on this? What an assessment involves? What sort of help is available?

Ideally I would need help with Shopping & Some housework that requires heavy lifting. Also, I cant get my bin out - is there any help I can get with this?

Hope someone can help

Thanks

easy

I am a disabled mum, and I receive Direct payments from social services to help with personal care and household tasks.

You first need to contact your local social services department (unless you already have a social worker). Explain your circumstances, and ask for help from the Adult disability team.

They would come to talk to you, and assess how many hours worth of help you need. They will assess how much help you need with personal care, and how much in your role as parent/homemaker. If you are successful you would then be awarded an amount of money each week to pay for that help. If you have any income (other than DLA), you may be asked to contribute a sum towards those hours.
It is then up to you to employ a "personal assistant" (or more than one if necessary) using that money. Bear in mind that you will need to deal with tax and NI, holiday & sick pay for your employees, altho there are agencies which can help you with this.

Do bear in mind that you cannot receive this help to pay specifically for childcare, but when my son was small, I used to have a carer here to help me, and she did help with childcare within that.

I suggest you also ask your local authority if you can see their "benefits rights advisor", who may help you to find any other funds you are entitled to.

Oh, on the subject of your dustbin, ring the refuse dept at the council, and ask them what you should do. (that said, when my husband worked away for a few months, my neighbour was quite happy to put my bin out when they did theirs, could you ask a neighbour to help?)

Good luck.

ShaShaSha

easy wrote: »

I am a disabled mum, and I receive Direct payments from social services to help with personal care and household tasks.

You first need to contact your local social services department (unless you already have a social worker). Explain your circumstances, and ask for help from the Adult disability team.

They would come to talk to you, and assess how many hours worth of help you need. They will assess how much help you need with personal care, and how much in your role as parent/homemaker. If you are successful you would then be awarded an amount of money each week to pay for that help. If you have any income (other than DLA), you may be asked to contribute a sum towards those hours.
It is then up to you to employ a "personal assistant" (or more than one if necessary) using that money. Bear in mind that you will need to deal with tax and NI, holiday & sick pay for your employees, altho there are agencies which can help you with this.

Do bear in mind that you cannot receive this help to pay specifically for childcare, but when my son was small, I used to have a carer here to help me, and she did help with childcare within that.

I suggest you also ask your local authority if you can see their "benefits rights advisor", who may help you to find any other funds you are entitled to.

Oh, on the subject of your dustbin, ring the refuse dept at the council, and ask them what you should do. (that said, when my husband worked away for a few months, my neighbour was quite happy to put my bin out when they did theirs, could you ask a neighbour to help?)

Good luck.

Thanks very much, very useful information.

Do you have any idea what the agencies are called that help? I guess if its mainly household tasks, I could just hire a cleaner to come in a couple of times a week and do the big things like hoover stairs etc

As for the bin, its half a mile to the end of the drive (we live on a farm) and my neighbour struggles with her own, but might think about just leaving the bin at the end of the drive and just drive down with rubbish as I come in and out....could be an idea!

Thanks again

easy

ShaShaSha wrote: »

Do you have any idea what the agencies are called that help? I guess if its mainly household tasks, I could just hire a cleaner to come in a couple of times a week and do the big things like hoover stairs etc

Hi, I was meaning agencies that will operate the pay issues for you, manage the PAYE and NI deductions, that sort of thing. If you are awarderd Direct payments, you will probably get details of an agency they recommend to handle this for you. I do my own, as I have a finance/business background, and you can actually go on an HMRC course to learn how to manage a payroll it if you prefer.

As far as the practical business of getting your housework done is concerned, then yes you can hire a cleaning lady of your own, no probs. But she must be paid correctly, deducting PAYE & NI.

Social Services will ask for a statement from time-to-time, detailing how the money has been used. You will probably need to set up a seperate bank account to handle these funds, by the way.

Savvy_Sue

Would the refuse lorry be able to get up your drive to pick the bin up from the house, and if they could is the drive up to it? If the answer's no then you're right, driving your rubbish down to it is probably the best way to go! :rotfl: You could maybe keep an upright standing bag in the boot to make sure there were no problems if any escaped.

However, my parents have recently got the bin men collecting their bins from inside the gate, they had to fill in a form which I think they got from Social Services, but I'm sure it would be available direct.

Paparika

I've just had social services at my home on Friday..
she basically tried to talk me out of help in the home, she asked what i wanted..

I said that i needed help with the housework, preparing and cooking food.. she said no we don't get help with housework although even tho i wanted direct payments just for that, but she gave me a list of companies that come and do it, and you pay out of your care part of dla, she has left me very confused. she said use it or loose it.. i can see her point, but that's what direct payments are for as well aren't they?

anyway there is upto 12 weeks assessment to see what you need, usually they can decide before then, but i haven't heard anything else from my social worker so i don't know if she will be back or not...

easy

Paparika wrote: »

I've just had social services at my home on Friday..
she basically tried to talk me out of help in the home, she asked what i wanted..

I said that i needed help with the housework, preparing and cooking food.. she said no we don't get help with housework although even tho i wanted direct payments just for that, but she gave me a list of companies that come and do it, and you pay out of your care part of dla, she has left me very confused. she said use it or loose it.. i can see her point, but that's what direct payments are for as well aren't they?

anyway there is upto 12 weeks assessment to see what you need, usually they can decide before then, but i haven't heard anything else from my social worker so i don't know if she will be back or not...

Paprika,

I suspect social workers are going to try to talk you out of your requirements ATM, simply because the councils are sooooo very short of money. If you need extra help/care (and preparing food has to count as care, surely, along with laundry and basic home hygiene), then you need it. Yes your care component of DLA can help with that, but doesn't go far. BTW DLA isn't a "use it or lose it" allowance. It is yours to use/not spend as you wish/need.

Direct payments are monitored, and if you don't use the money that is given to you, you have to pay it back, and they may re-assess to remove some hours from your assessment.

I think you will have to fight for this. Don't leave it up to the social worker, ring and ask when she is coming back, and ask again if you can be assessed for direct payments to help.

ShaShaSha

Paparika wrote: »

I've just had social services at my home on Friday..
she basically tried to talk me out of help in the home, she asked what i wanted..

I said that i needed help with the housework, preparing and cooking food.. she said no we don't get help with housework although even tho i wanted direct payments just for that, but she gave me a list of companies that come and do it, and you pay out of your care part of dla, she has left me very confused. she said use it or loose it.. i can see her point, but that's what direct payments are for as well aren't they?

anyway there is upto 12 weeks assessment to see what you need, usually they can decide before then, but i haven't heard anything else from my social worker so i don't know if she will be back or not...

I would have asked her to put her information in writing for you, so you can remember and think it over....then if she had the balls to put that in writing, take it to her superior for verification!

Paparika

Thanks for the reply's.

Well i still haven't heard from her so that will now go on my list of things to do.

She basically said when i last saw her that i probably don't want someone in my kitchen taking over...... well the help would be nice, and take the pressure off my son.

She said did i really want a stranger coming in and helping in and out of the bath, well ok i wouldn't like to have a stranger see me naked etc, but, what if some point in the future oh is no longer around to help, i really don't want to ask my 14 year old son to help as i think that's not well you know what i mean.

They also don't supply anyone to come in and do the housework either...

so this is where i thought direct payments would of helped me, i can hire someone to do what i need doing... some point in the future i hope to move to a more suited home, so hoping again i would have a wetroom/shower

krishna

Direct payments can only be used to pay for things that have been agreed in your care plan. So if they won't provide the help directly, you still can't use direct payments for that. Anything that is funded will be in your care plan which should be produced following a needs assessment carried out in line with Fair Access to Care Services. The main advantage of direct payments is that you get to CHOOSE who you employ to carry out tasks, which may be particularly important for you if you need help with bathing etc.

Useful organisation to contact for disabled parenting issues is Disability, Pregnancy & Parenthood International (http://www.dppi.org.uk)

easy

She basically said when i last saw her that i probably don't want someone in my kitchen taking over...... well the help would be nice, and take the pressure off my son.

She said did i really want a stranger coming in and helping in and out of the bath, well ok i wouldn't like to have a stranger see me naked etc, but, what if some point in the future oh is no longer around to help, i really don't want to ask my 14 year old son to help as i think that's not well you know what i mean.

They also don't supply anyone to come in and do the housework either...

Hmm, she's presuming a lot, your social worker.

Would you want someone taking over in your kitchen .... well maybe not, but you NEED someone to come in and HELP you.

And whilst non of us want's a stranger to come and help you out of the bath, it's better than not being able to bathe at all !!! The whole idea of direct payments is that you don't get STRANGERS doing it, you have the money to employ someone you choose to help you (yes, they may be a stranger at first, but you get to know them) You may have your OH to help you, but what if he hurts his back or summink ??

When I was awarded Direct Payments (about 6 years ago now), my SW specifically said that my assistants could help with housework etc. The idea was to "level the playing field" so I could do for my family what other mothers can do (son was just 4 at the time).

I have a helper now who cooks for me (or just peels and chops up things for me to cook later, as thats what I have trouble with), irons for me, and will shove the vac round when needed. She does sometimes collect DS up from school too, which isn't really in her remit, but as she does it on her way here, I don't see it's a problem really.

I know the economic climate has changed, and councils are short of money, but if you NEED help, you NEED help.