Frightened And Need Help!!

ladybez

No one will judge you for what you've done. No one is perfect, if they were they wouldn't be on here!! Sit down with a cup of tea and work out you true financial position then post it on here and the helpful people on here will make some suggestions as to how to deal with the situation. You will need to look at ways of upping your income, have you tried online surveys and mystery shopping, there are links on here somewhere for those. In the meantime, don't dispair and keep posting.

sunnymoneytree

Kissjens advice was great, and re. Christmas...there's HUGE pressure to spend, but don't worry about that now...it's a few month's away and just another pressure if you choose to worry about it, plus it IS just one day. You,ve taken a step backwards but change is always challenged...it's what you do now that counts. Good Luck!!

findingmyfeet

hi dreamerhelen,
just wanted to say hang on in there, in a similar situation myself. Being self employed is really difficult at the moment, working harder than ever for less and less. Good or better times will be back eventually(PLEASE............). Just keep trying and keep tuning in on this website....loads of brill ideas and support...shame i dont have as many nice understanding people living around here as i read about on here. As for christmas take it as it comes, dont stress be with your family and why not make your own gifts this year loads of ideas on here too.

take care , big hug

fmf

bluejeans

Just wanted to say, I too messed up yet again. I cant offer any advice but I know how you feel xxx

sp1987

Do not be ashamed, you are trying your best. You have identified why it has gone wrong e.g. the takeaways/cabs and now you can set about sorting this out. Can you write a note to put in your purse ''I cannot afford a takeaway this week'' so you see it when you open your purse. You may need a nice visual push not to do it.

Your friend who needs the money will understand how hard it is. You will need to give them something to show willing but you cannot magic the £2500 from nowhere. Once somebody has helped you work out what you can afford think about setting up a regular payment even if it is only a few pounds a month (e.g. standing order?), just so they know you will pay them back and they can see your effort. Provided I knew someone was trying their best to pay me back I would not mind half as much. Do not keep promising 2500 from thin air as that is going to cripple you and they will probably know full well it will not be possible for you. Better to get it trickling in and knowing it is slowly on its way.

Losing_it

Hi, I joined this site just 2-3 days ago and already I'm seeing light again. I have a plan of action and am going to stick to it. It is not just the debt side but everything else in my life, but I will turn it around.

Over the last 10-15 years I've made many mistakes, one or two very much life changing for the worse.

As has already been pointed out there are many wonderful people here who will help you put things in perspective and help you see things in a totally different light.

There is light at the end you just need to take stock of the situation, reign in the outgoings and get control of things once you start eating slowly into the debt you will feel much better.

This site will be become your place to find support and advice when needed but only you can help your situation and change your life for the better.

tigerfeet2006

You've had some out standing advice here, the only thing I would like to add is phone Businedd Debtline and have a chat with them about your situation. Thier link and no. are in my sig.

All the best and don't panic.

moneysavingmonkey85

Hi
I hope you got some sleep, it does always help. There is plenty of great advice already, so I just wanted to show my support. You really need to stop beating yourself up, many people have made much worse financial decisions - just look at the banks themselves - so they have no right to make you feel guilty.
Be 100% honest with yourself, then honesty with your creditors/friends/family will be easier.
Lots of hugs,

DreamerHelen

Thank you so much for all of your help over the past 24 hours....It has pretty much been hell today...but I think I'm through the worst of it.

I basically pulled my head out of my !!!!....and I sat down and wrote down everything that needs to be Paid on a Monthly Basis and also what hasn't been paid this Month and also the things that need to be paid by the end of the Year.

Then I sat down and worked out a Schedule for this Week....then I sorted out some cash-in-hand work for today and I've earned enough today to pay almost half my Debts which should be paid tomorrow (well, technically today). The rest I should have earned by the end of Tomorrow as I have sorted out some more Cash-in-hand work for tomorrow....

I've also been working like absolute crazy today - In both Jobs. It's now 2am and I've been awake since about 7.30am and I'm still working...

It's about pulling my head out of my !!!! and realising that if I want to do all the wonderful things that I want to do both this Year AND next Year that I need to get my !!!! in gear and work bloody hard until I've achieved what I set out to do.

Thank you everyone for not hating me - I plan to work a month ahead of myself, so by the end of September I will have all the money I need for October....by the end of October I'll have what I need for November - And so on.

The extra things can be peppered in when I get extra work. And I've also got a Plan to pay off my Three smallest Debts, so that will free up Extra Money. I also want to try and save for a Pension Fund, I know I'm only young but I'll probably be self-employed for a good few years and by the time I get to Retiremant age there probably won't be a State Pension left!!

Anyway...thank you everyone....I think the emergency may have passed (fingers crossed) but thank you ALL for being there when I needed you in my darkest hour...

ladybez

Happy to have been able to help. Remember, we are always here for you. Good luck with your plans.