Frightened And Need Help!!

DreamerHelen

Hi Guys, I have a Debt-Wannabee Diary but I need help now and I wasn't sure if anyone reads my Diary...so I thought I would post my last frantic post on my Diary in here...I hope that's okay:

Okay....I'm coming back to you guys and absolutely and thoroughly ashamed of myself - I just keep on messing up and messing up over and over again

I've not accrued anymore Debt, however I was unable to Pay my Debts in August and now I cannot pay them in September. It's not that I haven't been working - Because I have - But my Rent, Bills and Priority Debts have to come first.

But, and here's where I am really really ashamed of myself and I hope that you Guys don't really slate me for this one - I lied to my Creditors...I thought that I could buy some more time, so I told them that my Bank had been shut down because of a Fraudulent Investigation when I was travelling and so I needed more time to pay. They have all given me until this coming Tuesday (8th September) to pay, some have insisted on a Double Payment and right now I don't have it, any of it. I feel so ashamed of myself - I HATE lying to people and there are no justifications...I will completely understand if nobody here wants anything to do with me again

I tried contacting CCCS, they couldn't get me an Appointment until the beginning of October because I am Self-Employed. Should I try calling PayPlan and see what they can offer me? CCCS were very nice but when I asked them how to deal with my Creditors until I could get a DMP in place they couldn't answer me - They just said "Do what you can".

I'm way in over my head and I know it - And I'm so ashamed of myself for getting back into this Position!!! :mad:

The reason that I haven't earned enough is for several reasons (and again, I'm ashamed of some of these):

1) I got sick and so, with no holiday/sick pay, I simply couldn't work.
2) I started catching expensive Cabs again
3) I keep buying silly amounts of Takeaways.
4) Work has been very slow - So even when I AM working, no customers.

I know that there are only so many chances that people are going to give me to sort myself out (you guys included) - But I just keep on messing up over and over again.

What makes it more complicated is that I never know from one month to the next how much I'm going to earn. Some of the work I do is cash in hand but I want to declare it to the Tax People anyway, at least I can be honest about what I earn.

There are several things that MUST be paid for by the end of this Year:

1) I'm starting a Course to better my Career in January, this has to be paid for by beginning of November and is £1750, I am already committed to this as I have paid the Deposit.

2) My Tax Bill - I think it will come to about £2500.

3) A Repayment of £2500 to a Friend that desperately needs the money back, I have promised it back to him by the end of this Year.

4) Christmas - Even done on the Cheap it's still going to be at least £250 (I have a large Family).

I simply don't know what to do and I'm hoping that I haven't completely turned you all away from me

The other stupid thing that I did was to deal with all of my Creditors by Phone, so I have no real records of what has been said (except that I know what story I gave out).

What do I do next? Should I contact PayPlan and hope they can give me a better or earlier Date? What should I do about the Payments for my Debts that should be made on Tuesday? How do I ever sort it out when I dread answering my Phone and opening my Post? How do I ever look myself in the eyes again?

Please help me...

Shoe_Gal

Sorry, l have no advice but l'm sure people will be along soon to help

No need to feel ashamed, we've all done silly things to end up here :rolleyes:

DreamerHelen

Thank you Shoe Gal - At least one person on here doesn't hate me.

I simply can't sleep until I have a Plan....and right now I can't figure one out

Shoe_Gal

Of course I don't hate you - just look at my siggy to see l have no room to talk

Just wish l could help - but not sure how

DreamerHelen

Thank you - I'm trying to relax but I'm scared and upset and feel horribly ashamed of what I've done...

I'll give it another half hour and then try to get some sleep...

DreamerHelen

Shoe_Gal wrote: »

Of course I don't hate you - just look at my siggy to see l have no room to talk

Just wish l could help - but not sure how

Thank you hun, I really appreciate that. Now how do I go about not hating myself???

Shoe_Gal

DreamerHelen wrote: »

Thank you hun, I really appreciate that. Now how do I go about not hating myself???

Now that's a tough one - but don't be too hard on yourself. You have owned up and want to deal with the problem - that's a brave thing to do :A

DreamerHelen

Shoe_Gal wrote: »

Now that's a tough one - but don't be too hard on yourself. You have owned up and want to deal with the problem - that's a brave thing to do :A

Thank you hun, but it's not the first time I have messed up

Oh well....I guess I could try to get some sleep....but not sure how exactly since I'm so mad at myself...and upset

kissjenn

Hi,

Starter for 10 from me, and then go to your bed, things always look worse when you're tired.

1) I'm starting a Course to better my Career in January, this has to be paid for by beginning of November and is £1750, I am already committed to this as I have paid the Deposit. If you can't afford this this year then don't slide into more debt. It may be far more sensible to take the hit on the deposit or ask if you can defer and when things are a little more settled do it then.

2) My Tax Bill - I think it will come to about £2500. You need to talk to HMRC asap and explain position. They have dedicated helpline and are more pre-disposed than ever to allow you time to pay. You will probably be charged interest but that's much more manageable than a big lump sum. Along side those phased payments, save the money for the next bill so you don't end up in the same position in 6 months.

3) A Repayment of £2500 to a Friend that desperately needs the money back, I have promised it back to him by the end of this Year. Have a heart to heart with your friend. Does he need a lump sum or installments which you fully commit to paying on time every month. At the end of the day, your priority bills including HMRC who have real teeth come first. You should do the very best for your friend but you can't do anything for him if you're homeless and closed down by HMRC.

4) Christmas - Even done on the Cheap it's still going to be at least £250 (I have a large Family). Nope. On the cheap is Christmas goodwill and honesty. You can't afford the money or stress of this. If you have your own young children then do something creative and very cheap for them Beyond that cancel Christmas except for stuff you can do on a wing on a prayer and already have the materials for. Be honest, credit crunch, tough trading conditions - you are putting the material side of Christmas on hold and hope your family support you in that decision. You'll probably find they'll be relieved and delighted - everyone is feeling the pinch.

AFter that little lot, SOA time. Show us what you bring in (realistically) and what you spend (genuinely). You know your friends here will help out.

KJ

emmington_2

Great advice from Kissjenn be sure to listen to it

I know exactly how you are feeling, I have messed up over and over and over again since I was 18, I am 25 now. The best thing is just to sit down, take a step back and breathe. Look at all the different forum's on this site, even if it is not just directed at you, the advice is still good.

The lying about the bank thing was probably a bit naughty but don't worry about it, it's done now. Creditors generally like honesty, if you tell them you simply don't have the full balance that they are expecting but offer them something, even if it is less than half of the payment they were expecting they will generally take it, and at least it shows willing. You can send letters to them with a proposal of how you plan to tackle the problem, the only thing is that you need to be realistic about that proposal as you will have to stick to it.

Who is the course with that you plan on studying? Generally, you can cancel them before the course has started. I appreciate that you want to better your career, but, you will be in a much better mind set and will find that you do much better at the course when you are not worrying about things like debt... Something to think about.

The present thing for xmas, forget about that! I have an agreement with my family that I don't buy them anything and so they don't buy me anything. It is just another day and ultimately it is a family day to be spent toghether and presents are just an added bonus, you can't afford it so don't buy it

Emmington

moo2moo

First things first. No ones here to judge you. We all make daft mistakes once in a while.

Next buy a book of stamps. Write a letter to each of your creditors stating that due to stress / mental health issues/ harassment whatever you are no longer prepared to communicate with them by phone and request all further correspondancein writing. I'm sure you'll find a template on here to cover that somewhere.

Not a long term solution but for the minute unplug your phone or turn the ringer off or turn your answerphone on. That way you can at least sleep undisturbed. I get the impression you work evenings and nights theres no point being too tired to focus on your job.

Next the job - if you're free lance and there are no customers do you still get paid if you're available to work but not actually doing anything? Can you get a second job to cover you during this quiet period?

Phone PayPlan anyway at least then you'll have two different perspectives to deal with when you finally get your CCS appointment.