Need advice badly......please

tinkly33

Hi

I need advice badly, so ill start from the beginning.

I became a single parent 10 years ago, my ex left me in debt roughly £5,000's worth (not loads) but enough when u have to survive on benefits. I was evicted out of my home due to the property being a tied accomodation to my ex's job, lost my friends and my job all in the same month, and thats when it started. I tried so hard to pay the debts of meeting all payments on time etc but as time went on i could not afford to feed my kids and relied on my mum bringing goodies once a week (she never knew until recently). It was at this point i started seeking credit cards and obtained 3 with no problem and used them all.

Barclay card offered me a starting credit of £4,000 (currently under payment plan but still huge interest charges and late payment fees)
Citi gave me £3,000 (managing)
Capital one gave me £500 but increased now to £2,500(current balance £2,400 & managing)

Bearing in mind i was not working at this point i accepted all of them. They helped loads at the time not only for food and general bills but also trying to escape the stigma of single parenthood on benefits which was heavy on us as we had nothing!

As you can imagine the snowball effect started, paying off credit with credit and living off credit (at least we had food) 10 years later i am still living off credit to survive.

To cut this story short i have worked my butt off over the last 5 years to get a degree and get myself out of debt i currently owe just over £7,000 and start a new job tommorrow which offers a promising career and future for my children (and me).

The thing is just when i am getting sorted and there is light at the end of the tunnel i get slapped in the face with another debt of £3,000 by housing benefit over payment!!! Im not sure how i owe this or what has happened as i have always been honest and open all throughout. I am fighting it tooth and nail but its not getting me anywhere. We have been in dispute for 3 months over it and im not giving in.

But I seem to be fighting non stop and i just cannot take it anymore, my first pay packet is due end of sept and its gone already paying off debt, i know its my own fault and i know i should not have taken cards etc but i had no choice. I have even thought of ending the stress for good as i just cannot cope. Ive worked so hard to better myself but theres always someone wanting to pull you down and take their share.


I know my debt is not as big as some i have read about on here but none the less its still distructive. i don't know what im asking of you all really, some advice, some hope maybe that things will improve!! I have stopped spending what i have not got but groceries are still paid for with credit as we need to eat. I just cannot see it ending tho, i never go out so there is no chance of me ever meeting anyone which adds to the stress of being lonely and isolated and unable to cope, this weekend i have never felt so bad, my kids were with their dad and it would have been so easy just to end it. Im 34 (just) and my life is wasting away before my eyes.......am i sounding desperate yet? As i really really really do feel it, i dont want to do this anymore, im tired, i have fought for 10 years to better myself and clear debt, provide for my children and its got me knowhere so whats the point? I can't even afford decent work clothes for tommorrow!

Sorry for the long post it feels good to rant. Words of wisdom would be good im open to all suggestions and critisms and ideas. I know i have failed so far but maybe i can pull this off.

xAx

Toto

Hi Tinkly, firstly welcome to the DFW board, you have made the first step and I can promise you that if you stick around here you will get loads of help and support with the debt busting.

What always helps is if people post a full SOA. The link you will need for that is here www.makesenseofcards.com/soacalc.html

Once you have posted that we will go over it and point out where you can make savings and how to do just that.

aimingforadebtfreelife

You have made the right move and sought help and we are here to help. A lot of us have had experiences like you so you are not alone.

We need you to get off the food on credit cycle. Can you post and income and expenditure list so we can see what goes where? Once its up then the help will come flooding in.

wannabedebtfree_2

Post an SOA so people can look at your spending, there may be areas that others notice that you might not have looked at.

If you are using credit just to live (which is how I got in my mess) then it is a massive issue and need sorting quickly, your essential spending (rent, council tax, utilities, food) should come out of your budget BEFORE paying your debt, if this means arranging to pay less then so be it.......

Don't ever think that ending it will be better for everyone, your life is worth way more than these debts, could you really do that to your kids? Ask for help, theres lots out there xx

LeeSouthEast

Welcome. I didn't want to read and run. Consider posting an SoA so we can get a better look at your financial position. We can then begin to help in depth.

emmington_2

Post the SOA and we can look at your outgoings. Where there is a will there is a way

Also, talk me through this housing benefit thing? Do you live with the council or a housing association? I used to work for a Housing Assocation and so have some experience in the matter. Is it not the case that your housing benefit is paid direct to the council/housing assocation? If so, you are not liable for the debt, they are. Sometimes they just chase you so that you can kick the council's/housing associations !!! into gear to get them their money. Honestly, do not worry about this debt, even if you are liable, which I struggle to understand how you are it can be paid back at LESS THAN £2.00 a week with NO INTEREST. The credit cards are your priority. Give me some more details on this i.e. how they have come to the conclusion that you owe it to them and I may be able to help you more.

Emmington

tealady

Hi If you are having problems with your Council and HB then go an see your Councillor and ask them to help. If you feel your Council are hassling you ask for their complaints proceedure, at least it usually means that someone higher up will look at it for you.

tinkly33

Hi everyone,

Im doing my SOA but it may take time as i need to dig out all my paperwork (its hidden). Plus i am in between coming of benefits and working so am unsure of income as yet! I am feeling slightly better today but the stress is always there and i know i was not concentrating on my job which for my job is not an option as you need your wits about you.

Emmington - Because of the type of degree i was doing we were given an incentive payment (bursery) of £4,575 per year. When i was re-assessed for housing council tax benefit at the beginning of my degree i asked them over the phone, if this bursery was included in the assessment being as it was a gift/incentive. The lady on the phone did not know what it was so went and asked her supervisor, then came back and said, no its not taken in to account, this was also backed up by the bursary company who wrote a letter stating it cannot be touched or considered in HB/CTB. Now 3 years later they have come back to me and now said this is going to be taken into account and back dated over a 3 year period, which leaves me owing them £2,500, and conveniantly the letter they recieved from the bursary company has disapeared!.....

So thats the story on that one, i am fighting it. Also other letters i have sent have also gone missing i was meant to be re-assessed in May for council tax as i had been exempt for 3 years gave my letter to their visiting officer stating i wanted to apply for council tax benefit....when i phoned 8 weeks later they never had my letter and still today it is unresolved.

I have written to the benefits manager and am considering going further, funny thing is though as from today i work for the same council!!!!!

As of today tho i have started paying my own rent alas meaning we now have £40 to last us for the next 3 weeks till payday (hopefully).

emmington_2

Did you keep a copy of the letter and or can you source one? That letter is very important! I would fight it. They are within their rights to do it but as you have said, they had written confirmation from the company and the lady on the phone told you otherwise. They will put the account on hold whilst you fight it and so for the mean time it is one less thing to worry about. Tell them you are going to dispute it and ask them to send you a confirmation letter that they have put the account on hold. Then I would suggest that you go and see the CAB, they are experts in HB and such like where as I am not, I am just familiar with the processes.

As I said before though even if it does end up that you have to pay it, council's are good in only taking what you can afford. Even if you offered them £2 a week, I am sure that they would accept.

Hope that this helps.

Emmington.

emmington_2

Don't forget the SOA, very important

polaroid

Hi , i didnt want to read and run.

sometimes when we feel in a pickle it is easy to just see the bad, but you have done really well. re-read your post, look how far you have come! You worked hard, got a degree, raised your kids on your own and you now have a job. well done you - that is a lot! its a big thing to go back to work and come off benefits,especially when you have debts to pay.

also you have accepted the debt that you have got and you are repaying it.

please go your local CAB and get some help with Council tax problem. all sounds a bit out of order if they knew about your bursary.they will definately be able to advise you

good luck with your new job, i think you should be dead proud of yourself.

:)