Son can escape from car seat!!!

fernliebee

This sounds like a silly thing to say, and you probably do have them correctly fitted, but if his straps are adjustable, are you sure they are tight enough, and at the right height setting etc. Just thinking that I do my DD up so tight I don't think she could physically get her arms out The straps should be flat against their body and firm so they can't lean forward and don't shake about in the event of an accident. Also if they are wearing a coat, or thick jumper take it off before getting in seat as this gives them more room to be able to get out. If he is actually undoing the button then that is a different matter.

I agree with the others that it is a discipline thing, if you are consistant with this, and also all other behaviour then he will get it, but if he thinks for a sec he can get away with it, then he will not stop. Even with ADD or ADHD he can understand this, especially if he is 'super' intelligent as you suggest. Keep it up, and he will learn.

fernliebee

Also just to say that in the event of an accident, emergency services cut the straps rather than fiddling around with the buttons anyway so don't worry too much if you have to get a cover for the button.

Could you try giving him things to do or look for while you drive, story CD's to listen to, or play simplified I spy (We used to do I spy something that is red with our youngest children at work.) If he is getting your attention in a different way, he may not resort to escaping as much.

Gingham_Ribbon

davidsonsl wrote: »

I hear what you are all saying but unfortunately the discipline route has not worked with him, I have been trying this for months now when evr he takes his arms out of his straps I have stopped the car until he has put his arms back in, he always puts them back in but so far it has not prevented him from doing so. He is unfortunately very strong and highly intelligent, he can work out things that my 5yr old struggles with. I also am waiting for a refferal as I think he has ADHD and ODD, as a result he is a handful. I can't believe there isn't a solution to kids being able to unstrap themselves from their car seats.

I hope you don't mind me saying, but I strongly recommend 2 things here.

The first is that you get hold of a copy of 'Misdiagnosis and dual diagnoses of the Gifted Child.' It is extremely common for gifted children to be thought to have ADHD ODD or aspergers, among other things. This is sometimes because they do have one of these things, but often it is down to asynchronous development. See here: http://www.stephanietolan.com/gt_as_asynch.htm

The other suggestion is that you contact the NAGC for help.

You've got your work cut out here, but things will improve, I promise! I couldn't have got through without the NAGC and the book I suggest made me cry with relief.

My oldest son has asynchronous development. As his verbal reasoning is remarkably high, I could explain to him the potential consequences of his actions along with making it awkward for him if he didn't do what I asked. That worked with his seatbelt, but not for attempting to wander into the road, as his impulse control was slow to develop. He had time to reason out the seatbelt but not other things, like leaning out of windows or the road thing.

The other thing I did was have him assessed by an ed psych who understands asynchronous development AND ADHD and aspergers.

Do PM me if you want details of the ed psych or just to talk.

Edit: I meant to add - he's an absolutely joy. Although he finds concentrating on 'easy' things difficult and bounces around a lot, we just don't have any significant discipline problems at all and I'm extremely proud of him. He's 5. He needs remarkably little sleep though, is very willful and gets bored very easily. Once we found out how to best help him though things get very easy.

davidsonsl

Thanks Gingham Ribbon, you seem to know what it is I am going through with this one, my son is definately not an ordinary little boy and I must stress I do not say that lightly as he has a twin brother and an older sister so I do have experience with children. I will definately look into the website you have recommended and I am seeing my GP for a referral to a specialist this fri. Thanks.

Gingham_Ribbon

The NAGC offer support and advice on their helpline and you don't need to be a member. I have found them extremely useful, from dealing with discipline to just understanding how exhausting it is to hearing someone laughing in delight when I tell them something he's said or done, rather than looking at me like I'm deluded.

Ask about the referral. It's important that the person who's helping is aware of asynchronous development and how it affects behaviour. Someone who doesn't know about it can mistake (for example) a child who is thinking so much that they can't focus on the person talking to them as ADHD or a child who refuses to eat meat as oppositional when in reality he could be horrified at eating dead animals - even at 2 years old. Try to be as informed as you can before you meet the person who will be helping you. The book really will help with that.

There is so much that is positive about these kids and that can't be stressed enough. A child who is so determined to see out the car back window that he can't wait till it stops to get out of his seat is a worry to the parents, but later he'll be the young man whose energy and drive will get him through times when it may be easier to give up. And the child who works out how to undo the childproofing may make your hair grey, but he could well be the one who works out solutions to complicated problems when he's older too.

davidsonsl

Nicki wrote: »

I realise your child doesn't have special needs, but this link from a special needs forum I also read, has lots of useful links to companies which provide houdini-proof harnesses to solve this problem!

http://www.asd-forum.org.uk/forum/index.php?showtopic=21236&hl=seat

Thanks for this, they do a harness which looks fab, only problem is it is really pricey and i'm not convinced my son wouldn't work out how to undo it!!! unfortunately I cannot search the rest of the forum as it says I am an un-authorised user. But have started looking for something similar elsehwere.

Nicki

davidsonsl wrote: »

Thanks for this, they do a harness which looks fab, only problem is it is really pricey and i'm not convinced my son wouldn't work out how to undo it!!! unfortunately I cannot search the rest of the forum as it says I am an un-authorised user. But have started looking for something similar elsehwere.

All you need to do to be an authorised user though is to register, like you did on here! It's a free forum, and you don't need ever to post on it.

However, if you are going down a diagnosis route because you feel your child has some additional issues going on, you might perhaps be able to get access to an Occupational Therapist or some other form of professional who could suggest an appropriate piece of kit, which might do the trick (and maybe even provide it for free)?

the_other_mce

I had this problem with BOTH my DD's when they were toddlers (must be in thier genes!), and I found the only way was to buy a new car seat with a 3 point seatbelt using the seatbelt in the car ( the same as mummy and daddys!). I'm a bit worried about suggesting this as I was totally slated on a previous thread on here for suggesting it :mad: but fortunately both my children were quite tall for their age, the seat fitted them well and they were both able to understand that they would have to go back to their old 'baby' seats if they unstrapped themselves. I bought the car seats from Mothercare and it meant that we were able to arrive at places in time, with safely strapped in children who weren't crying and no stressed parents! I had tried the discipline: waiting in lay-bys for hours, virtually 'tying' them in with baby reins, not going out in the car until a grown-up could sit next to them, etc without success. The car seats I bought lasted them until they were old enough to only need a booster seat. They are 12 and 10 now .... and ALWAYS wear their seat belts!!
HTH

davidsonsl

Nicki wrote: »

All you need to do to be an authorised user though is to register, like you did on here! It's a free forum, and you don't need ever to post on it.

However, if you are going down a diagnosis route because you feel your child has some additional issues going on, you might perhaps be able to get access to an Occupational Therapist or some other form of professional who could suggest an appropriate piece of kit, which might do the trick (and maybe even provide it for free)?

Great idea I hadn't thought of that, diagnosis I have been told however will take 6 months!!!

davidsonsl

the_other_mce wrote: »

I had this problem with BOTH my DD's when they were toddlers (must be in thier genes!), and I found the only way was to buy a new car seat with a 3 point seatbelt using the seatbelt in the car ( the same as mummy and daddys!). I'm a bit worried about suggesting this as I was totally slated on a previous thread on here for suggesting it :mad: but fortunately both my children were quite tall for their age, the seat fitted them well and they were both able to understand that they would have to go back to their old 'baby' seats if they unstrapped themselves. I bought the car seats from Mothercare and it meant that we were able to arrive at places in time, with safely strapped in children who weren't crying and no stressed parents! I had tried the discipline: waiting in lay-bys for hours, virtually 'tying' them in with baby reins, not going out in the car until a grown-up could sit next to them, etc without success. The car seats I bought lasted them until they were old enough to only need a booster seat. They are 12 and 10 now .... and ALWAYS wear their seat belts!!
HTH

I did actually try my twins in big boy seats and after 2 weeks gave up, my other son never attempted to get out of his but my escape artist frequently either undid his belt or just pulled the belt so he could slip out. I put them both back in the baby seats thinking he was "safely restrained" and could not get out of that one!!! how wrong was I ????