A will and an exercise in diplomacy, or barge in?

delain

Hello! This may be a long post

A relative of mine died in 2000 (didn't really know her tbh, a great grandma) and her house (which was in a total state) sold allegedly for 27k. I was told at the time that this money was to be split equally between myself, my brother and our two cousins and our share to be given to us when we turn 25. I am the oldest and i turn 25 this year.

My uncle is apparently the executor of the estate, and he and my nan are very close and quite secretive, whilst my mum and my brother and i are considered the 'black sheep' of the family as they are quite well off and as my dad deserted us in 1989 for someone else we are not.

Some mention of this money was made between my nan and my mum. What follows is what i've heard from my mum.

She says that my nan asked her 'not to remind me' about this money, and that my mum is deeply suspicious about this will and whether it exists at all. My nan allegedly said 'things have to be paid for' which has led my mum to believe that this money just is not there.

I have recently come off IS as my partner now lives with me and i am looking for work too. Far from being pleased that the children have a stable home with a happy family that works to support itself my nan has given me considerable grief about the whole thing.

A nagging part of me thinks that she is annoyed that i'm off benefits because she can't use 'well you can't have any money because your benefits will stop' as an excuse.:rolleyes:

Now this is not so much about the money as about my nan and my uncle either deliberately lying about the will, or just messing everyone about. I couldn't care less if i get nothing, although it would be nice for the kids if we did but i just don't appreciate my mum and i getting lied to all the time!

Oh, and my nan has never once mentioned this will to me.

My question is, do i ask them if i can see the will, or just let them get on with it?

Savvy_Sue

You don't even have to ask her if you can see the will. They are publicly available documents, once 'proved'. Give thanks to Errata who posted this link about how to do it yesterday.

ceridwen

Good luck.

Its your money - so I'd ask for it in your position - even if I knew for a fact that they had stolen my money.

If its your money - its your money and they must pay up - whether its actually still there or not. They have houses presumably that they could sell to repay any money they have stolen from you? - and its their fault if they have to do so in the event (they shouldnt have stolen it).

So - I'd start by asking them politely for your money and take it from there if they dont just hand over a cheque (NB: dont forget the interest that money is due to have accummulated over the years - it will be rather more than the figure of money left to you all those years ago).

£6,875 + those years worth of interest must be at least £10,000 by now presumably in today's terms? (dont know how long ago this money was left to you?). £10k would be worth having...and its the principle of it - its YOUR money.

Mojisola

delain wrote: »

I was told at the time that this money was to be split equally between myself, my brother and our two cousins and our share to be given to us when we turn 25. I am the oldest and i turn 25 this year.

Do check the will first to make sure that what you were told is true. You don't want to go accusing people of mishandling the money if it wasn't yours in the first place. If they have spent what should be yours, it's a very serious matter and a very foolish way to behave. Did they really think you would 'forget' you had money coming to you?

delain

Mojisola wrote: »

Do check the will first to make sure that what you were told is true. You don't want to go accusing people of mishandling the money if it wasn't yours in the first place. If they have spent what should be yours, it's a very serious matter and a very foolish way to behave. Did they really think you would 'forget' you had money coming to you?

I don't think it's been 'mishandled' particularly I'm just not sure whether its even there in the first place. They got very cross when my mum told my brother and I about this at the time.

Thanks to Errata and Savvy Sue, i will check out that link now.

newlywed

If the only asset she had was the property, but had other debts etc then there would have been payments for the debt to come out of the proceeds of the sale of the property.

Eg bills would have been paid - gas, electric etc up till the time of death, any debts would have had to be settled, funeral expenses may have come out of it, if a solicitor was an executor then their fees would also have come out of it, and then the solicitors fees and survey costs etc for selling the house would have come out of that too.

Perhaps the amount left after all that is very minor and that's why she was annoyed that your mum had mentioned it. Or perhaps your great nan was in more debt than they thought and so there is nothing left, and she doesn't want to have to admit your great nan was in debt (older generation have a different view of debt)??


I would be more inclined to politely ask whether it is true that you were mentioned in the will and then ask if there was any monies left after the estate was settled.

Savvy_Sue

IF just asking the question is going to upset them, I'd check the will first, and then ask the question. Since they're going to be upset anyway, you might as well have the facts before you do it, rather than upset them by asking, then check, then upset them again if the facts contradict what they told you.

localhero

I agree with Savvy Sue here.

OP, get hold of a copy of the Will and see what it says. It may or may not provide discretion to the Executors.

Once it's clear what, if any, entitlement is yours you can tackle the Executors then - at the moment you have only hearsay.

Being an Executor (and Trustee) is a position of responsibility and they have a legal obligation to act in the best interests of the beneficiaries. They should also be keeping proper accounts of this money as they are personally liable for any losses that arise from their mismanagement.

I think I would be a bit suspicious that there has been no communication from them - particularly in view of the fact you are almost 25, rather than a child.

Come back to us once you've seen the Will and we can help you a bit more.

delain

Thank you, i will try to get enough info to track the will down from my mum.