My SOA - help please!

elyphant

Dear all,
Sorry I am very new on here I hope I am not being rude by posting this almost straight away. Have been on MSE for months now, and picking up loads of useful tips from eg OS board, freebies board, but I think I need more help.

I've done my SOA (see below). It shows a surplus of £187, but actually we seem to always spend more than we have coming in. I think it goes on odd bits you don't notice, like little toys for the kids. But a big thing is that when we have a big event, it sets us back for months. So last month I had 2 hen parties to go to, and each was £150+:eek: so that really made us struggle. I really need ruthless help, please. My OH is not quite on the ball, he doesn't exactly realise that when I tell him there isn't any money, that there really isn't (but then I am bad too - like those hen weekends).

Sorry for the long post, I just really need some tips. A few notes on the SOA below to help explain. Thanks in advance.

Household Information[/b]
Number of adults in household........... 2
Number of children in household......... 2
Number of cars owned.................... 1
Monthly Income Details
Monthly income after tax................ 1411
Partners monthly income after tax....... 0 (DH does work but very sporadic, and tends to go on extras not main expenses. Max £400 per month)
Benefits................................ 411 (C ben, CTC, WTC)
Other income............................ 425 (from family)
Total monthly income.................... 2247
Monthly Expense Details
Mortgage................................ 351
Council tax............................. 118
Electricity............................. 33 (not sure which is electric and which is gas - possibly scope for checking this, reducing usage and getting the DD reduced?)
Gas..................................... 49
Water rates............................. 40
Telephone (land line)................... 60 (not sure of this - have just switched provider and had huge first bill, much more than this, so this is an estimate)
Mobile phone............................ 15
TV Licence.............................. 10
Satellite/Cable TV...................... 19 (tied in for 11 months)
Internet Services....................... 5
Groceries etc. ......................... 175
Clothing................................ 30 (can reduce this I think - has been me thinking that sales are a good thing, but I think I will have to stop even that)
Petrol/diesel........................... 35
Road tax................................ 14
Car Insurance........................... 30
Car maintenance (including MOT)......... 21
Car parking............................. 15
Other travel............................ 80 (mainly for DH to travel to fetch and take back his son when he comes to stay)
Childcare/nursery....................... 285 (nursery fees will reduce slightly next year when DS2 turns 3)
Other child related expenses............ 210 (150 maintenance for DH's son - is far too much but don't ask - plus savings account for this child 25 per month, plus 35 per month school lunches)
Buildings insurance..................... 17 (buildings and contents combined)
Contents insurance...................... 0
Life assurance ......................... 10
Other insurance......................... 84 (critical illness cover for me and DH - not been looked at for years)
Presents (birthday, christmas etc)...... 0 - obviously we do spend on this but currently trying to get to be money neutral this year, or near it, with survey sites etc)
Haircuts................................ 25
Entertainment........................... 0 - an unspecified amount on 'stuff'
Holiday................................. 0 - went on a Sun holiday this easter, other than that don't go on hols. Tend to get big spends with things like hen weekends/weddings arranged by other people. Any tips on reducing these expenses without just saying no to everything welcome. Don't come round that often, but are huge when they do
Emergency fund.......................... 0 - what's that!!!!
Charities............................... 21 - have been reluctant to stop these but may have to
Pension................................. 82 - my personal pension - no work one
Total monthly expenses.................. 1834

Assets
Cash.................................... 6000
House value (Gross)..................... 230000
Shares and bonds........................ 0
Car(s).................................. 3000
Other assets............................ 0
Total Assets............................ 239000

Secured & HP Debts
Description....................Debt......Monthly...APR
Mortgage...................... 60000....(351)......4
Total secured & HP debts...... 60000.....-.........-
Unsecured Debts
Description....................Debt......Monthly...APR
Personal loan..................10000.....170.......6.9
Credit card....................1800......56........0
Total unsecured debts..........11800.....226.......-

Monthly Budget Summary
Total monthly income.................... 2,247
Expenses (including HP & secured debts). 1,834
Available for debt repayments........... 413
Monthly UNsecured debt repayments....... 226
Amount left after debt repayments....... 187
Personal Balance Sheet Summary
Total assets (things you own)........... 239,000
Total HP & Secured debt................. -60,000
Total Unsecured debt.................... -11,800
Net Assets.............................. 167,200
Created using the SOA calculator at www.makesenseofcards.com.
Reproduced on Moneysavingexpert with permission, using IE browser.[/font]

dancingfairy

Hi and welcome - nope it's not rude to post the SOA and it's almost always the first thing you'll be asked for anyway - and very good to have comments by everything - saves having to ask quite so many questions.
Right I'm off to go and have a look at your SOA now for you.
Back in a bit.
df

jen_a_c

I am by no means an expert, but the Critical Illness policy looks very high? Is it stand alone or with your mortgage? You say it hasn't been reviewed for a while - might be worth getting an IFA to look at it to ensure you're properly covered (as you've a mortgage and dependants) but not to excess.

dancingfairy

Mortgage................................ 351
Council tax............................. 118
Electricity............................. 33 (not sure which is electric and which is gas - possibly scope for checking this, reducing usage and getting the DD reduced?)
Gas..................................... 49 would check out if you are in credit and if so by how much for the gas and electric - make sure you have energy efficient bulbs, don't leave things on standby, lights off when not in the room, etc and have a look at the switching websites and see if you can save by switching.
Water rates............................. 40
Telephone (land line)................... 60 (not sure of this - have just switched provider and had huge first bill, much more than this, so this is an estimate) perhaps you need to keep an eye on this and see how much it works out at - do you make a lot of calls during the day? or to foregin countries or anything? check when and how you are using the phone.
Mobile phone............................ 15 that's good.
TV Licence.............................. 10
Satellite/Cable TV...................... 19 (tied in for 11 months) o.k it's not too bad anyway - could always see if you can cancel earlier but you may have to wait for the 11 months.
Internet Services....................... 5
Groceries etc. ......................... 175 is that right for 4 people for 1 month ? if so that's good.
Clothing................................ 30 (can reduce this I think - has been me thinking that sales are a good thing, but I think I will have to stop even that) ah ha - found a weakness - at least you know where some of you money has gone - perhaps you can have a good sort out and try and wear more of your clothes or ebay or car boot any extras?
Petrol/diesel........................... 35
Road tax................................ 14
Car Insurance........................... 30
Car maintenance (including MOT)......... 21
Car parking............................. 15
Other travel............................ 80 (mainly for DH to travel to fetch and take back his son when he comes to stay) is this train or bus or petrol?
Childcare/nursery....................... 285 (nursery fees will reduce slightly next year when DS2 turns 3) do you get childcare vouchers to help with this from your work? not sure how it works with the benefits though.
Other child related expenses............ 210 (150 maintenance for DH's son - is far too much but don't ask - plus savings account for this child 25 per month, plus 35 per month school lunches) not sure on this to be honest -it does seem a lot but families are complicated - aren't they - perhaps the school meals could go?
Buildings insurance..................... 17 (buildings and contents combined)
Contents insurance...................... 0
Life assurance ......................... 10
Other insurance......................... 84 (critical illness cover for me and DH - not been looked at for years) ought to check it over then and shop around and check it covers you for what you want/need
Presents (birthday, christmas etc)...... 0 - obviously we do spend on this but currently trying to get to be money neutral this year, or near it, with survey sites etc) present neutral is good.
Haircuts................................ 25
Entertainment........................... 0 - an unspecified amount on 'stuff'
Holiday................................. 0 - went on a Sun holiday this easter, other than that don't go on hols. Tend to get big spends with things like hen weekends/weddings arranged by other people. Any tips on reducing these expenses without just saying no to everything welcome. Don't come round that often, but are huge when they do
Emergency fund.......................... 0 - what's that!!!!
Charities............................... 21 - have been reluctant to stop these but may have to indeed you may want to stop this.
Pension................................. 82 - my personal pension - no work one important - glad to see you have this.
Total monthly expenses.................. 1834

Anyway your SOA doesn't look too bad to be honest - a few savings to be made here and there but you don't appear to be overspending drastically on those areas.
With 187 a month spare according to your SOA you really need to find out where this is going - a spending diary is useful here and it's scary when you write it all down. I think this is your problem area - it's probably going on the hen nights and the clothes and odd bits and pieces from what you have said.
If you can harness some of this money it would really help you.
Your debts are approx 11,000 which is not huge but now is the time to really nip it in the bud.
I think you need to set yourself a realistic entertainment budget. Try and have the girls over for drinks at home and a pampering evening, go to the cinema on wednesday with orange if you like the cinema, if you go out for meals try the 2 for 1 deals that lots of places seem to be doing now, maybe try an exercise class or sport - they can be relatively cheap, maybe have a meal in at home and get people to bring the drinks, or one can bring deserts and one the startes , etc.
With regards to the hen nights - perhaps some forward planning is needed - for example if you know they cost approx 150 each then you may have to have a few quiet months in order to be able to afford to go on them.
Anyway that's quite enough ramble from me - hope it gives you some ideas and suggestions.
df

elyphant

HI jen and dancing fairy, thanks so much for the quick replies.

Critical illness cover - I definitely need to review this, this is 3 policies altogether and I can't remember how it works. Think it's critical illness for me/DH, and income protection for me. Will look it all out and find an IFA. It's all standalone.

Gas and elec - We are def not in credit, but probably there are ways to reduce usage. Also we have had mostly estimated bills since we moved (1 year ago) so not sure if they have been higher or lower (eek) than our actual usage. Just gave an elec reading the other day so will soon see.

Telephone - will def keep an eye. Can be expensive cos DH makes calls during the day and to foreign countries, & not the cheapest. Need to have a look at the international calling thing on here and try and override provider I think.

Groceries - the £175 per month is based on my last couple of shops which I have really managed to reduce. Was quite a bit more than this (c. £240) Hopefully I will start to see the benefit of this in a month or so.

Clothes - ebay is definitely a good idea, will have a root round my wardrobe. I think there's a board on here for tips isn't there? Have never used ebay even as a buyer. I don't do a lot of shopping - would not get something every month - but I think I have been doing more than our finances will allow. Fortunately the kids (our two and DH's other) are all boys, so lots of hand-me-downs!

Travel - this is train. We go through the trainline and try to get the cheapest tickets. Still amounts to around £90 each time though.

Childcare/nursery - I looked into childcare vouchers, but according to some calculator, I was better off not taking them because I would have lost more in CTC than I gained in childcare vouchers.

Other child-related expenses - it is the maintenance which really gets me, but I honestly don't think i can do anything about that. Not set officially, I know it would be much lower if it was. Very reluctant to stop school meals - saves me a huge amount of time, and DS1 has always been a terribly fussy eater and I think the social discipline of school meals, and having to just have what there is (rather than jam sandwiches - aargh!!! - to be fair he's not that bad these days really) - is reallly good for him.

I am feeling much more positive already from having posted on here, but still feel a bit sick - we always seem to end up spending more than is coming in. I have done Martin's money makeover budget planner, and there must have been more included on there than the SOA. I would really like to be in a more stable position by this time next year. We are always in our overdraft (honestly don't remember the last time we had a positive balance).

Sorry, this is turning into a big moan. Thanks so much for the support.

elyphant

Sorry I just have a little bit more to post - I really will go away in a minute.

The spending diary I think will really help. It will hoepfully show where it is going. Entertainment wise I think mostly this is things like treats/days out with the children. Am really trying to clamp down on this, only got free/very low cost stuff lined up for the hols. DH not so good though -every time they go out they come back with new toys. Admittedly all from the charity shop etc, but even so. We don't ever go out (cinema etc) - we can't seem to afford it and also I rely quite heavily on family for daytime childcare so feels a bit much to get them in on a night as well.
Right, resolve to stop moaning and start my spending diary TODAY!!!

dancingfairy

Ah - thanks for the detailed replies - looks like you have stuff to work on eg gas/telephone, etc.
I think other people have had the same issue with reards to the childcare vouchers as well and that it works out worse for them.
Have a look at the DFW diaries board - there are several posters on there who are trying to entertain their children for free or as cheap as possible - an age old parental problem I guess - but hopefully they will give you some ideas.
I think Martin had a thread on cheap holidays at home as well which had some great ideas in it. - anyway things like picnics, parks, seaside etc are always good aren't they - any crafts they like? football? cooking bits and bobs? watching tv? cheap dvd rentals? going to a friends house and then reciprocating? doing a holiday scrapbook - taking pictures and collecting leaves/postcards etc? even if you are staying in the uk. Join the library? check out holidays clubs run by the schools/council etc. cheap swimming or sports clubs at the leisure centre?
df

nearlyrich

Harsh question alert please don't take it the wrong way.

Hubby works sporadically and earns a max of £400 but pays out £250 maintenance and extra into a savings account for his child. Why does he not have a full time job? if he is disabled or incapacitated in some way he should get some benefits. As a family you are struggling financially the maintenance and savings may have to become more realistic or he needs to get an income to service this.

the_cat

I agree nearlyrich

I would also question whether it is worth hubby working at all if it is so sporadically whilst the family are paying out almost £300 in childcare per month. Presumably benefits (WTC) would adjust upwards a little too

I applaud the father who wishes to provide an adequate maintainance for their child, I really do. However, he is not providing for it OP, you are. And as such you have every right to have a say in how much is affordable. Unless your OH is able and prepared to earn enough to cover this, it along with everything else MUST be up for negociation

gfplux

Hello elyphant,

Well done for posting your SOA.
you have already been given some fantastic advise.

You asked what the emergency fund is. Well here you would put something like £30. This would in a year total £360 and is there to cover emergencies like needing a new hot water boiler or replacing a broken hoover. it can even be used for a hen weekend in Dublin if needed except that should be covered by having say £25 in the holiday fund (£300 in a year) I think you should re-do your SOA including the emergency and holiday funds plus any of the other changes. Why not re post it on here.

However I think you have one big, big problem that you need to face up to.
Re read the last posts from the_cat and nearlyrich.
Also read your original post where you say " My OH is not quite on the ball, he doesn't exactly realise that when I tell him there isn't any money, that there really isn't"
Have you shown him the SOA? if not re do it as I suggest and then print it off and talk to him about it.

Good Luck, looking forward to your next post.

elyphant

Hi all thank you for your replies, it really feels good to get advice and support. Will try and be brief sorry my posts have been so long.

nearlyrich, the cat and gfplux, thank you for your harsh questions! This is exactly what I need. I think we definitely have a bit of an issue here but it is very difficult to know what to do. DH is a performer (musician) so when he is working he is away for a few days-a month at a time, otherwise he is at home with the kids. That's why we need the childcare even though he is at home some of the time - we need it for when he's away. Yes he could possibly get another job, but there are some problems - English is not his first language so there would be an initial outlay in English classes. Also, tbh he would be utterly miserable doing anything else and I think some past mental health issues may recur. So although it's difficult, I am fine with being the main breadwinner.

I think the bigger problem is the maintenance and costs for his other child. It sounds awful, I don't want to begrudge anything, but it is much more than it should be. But all unofficial so I don't know what to do about it. He is also unhappy about it, but whenever we try to discuss it with mum there are huge ructions which have a very bad effect on the child. It is total manipuliation but what can we do? I think if things get much worse we may need to bite the bullet and get some advice (legal). I've contacted the CSA anonymously, and it would be about £60 a month maintenance through them (cos my income wouldn't count, and they take into account that he is supporting two other children). Also, we also pay for extras for this child so it is probably even more than in my SOA.

Sorry, this has become a really long post after all. Showing DH the SOA is a really good idea, I think I will get it updated and show him, also will keep a spending diary for a while and show him that.

Emergency/holiday fund sounds good, will look at that probably next month. Have also read about piggybanking and set up some new accounts, hope that will help us see what we have.

THanks again for your patience with my rambles, and for all your advice.