Advice wanted helping elderly parents to buy a house.

Catblue

What does your husband/partner think about this? Would you contemplate taking out £120K of debt to help out his own parents or siblings?

What if his family are in need at some point in the future? Would he be happy to say to them "Sorry, we already took on a debt of £120K to allow teachergirl's parents to live in a £300K+ house, so we helped them but we won't help you out".

Another thing that could happen is that your children might wish to buy a property in a few years' time and with your money tied up in the other house, you might not be able to help THEM out (should you wish to, of course).

dopester

Catblue wrote: »

Another thing that could happen is that your children might wish to buy a property in a few years' time and with your money tied up in the other house, you might not be able to help THEM out (should you wish to, of course).

There used to be a time when people would be focussed on paying off their own mortgages.

Not seeing their homes as a funding-vehicle to feed into, in order to withdraw huge sums of money to buy other places for grandparents and children.... adding to their own debt and leaving themselves dangerously over-leveraged to falling property values, teacher job losses and pay-cuts, and other real-world changes which will melt your mind.

teachergirl

clutton...you are very insightful!!!!;)
Catblue funnily enough you have voiced some of my own thoughts. I asked DH what if his parents needed help? The truth is he is an only child,his parents own two houses, one they live in and one they rent out. They too are in their eighties and live even further away. They however have extended family around them and would not dream of leaving sunny Dorset. Ironically if we did help my parents in this way and one of his parents had to come to live with us it would be easier because if necessary we could make use of the "spare rooms around the corner." The one thing I hadn't thought of was my children...currently 12 and 15...I suppose in the next ten years they may want a house....will have to think about that one.
Oh and thank you to Hamish too you have voiced all the things we have thought..it seems to make perfect sense to us.:D

teachergirl

Dopester I do understand what you are saying and I know that we cannot predict everything that will happen. The main thing here is not about making a profit but about having your family really close to you for the rest of their lives. It's a ten year plan, which if there are unforseen circumstances we may have to rethink, but if it works then my parents and my family will be able to enjoy this time together with ease, dropping in on each other but also having our privacy.It is a gamble but I think the benefits will outweigh the risks.

bryanb

I can't understand how you can say your parents can only afford £180000 yet then talk of a live in carer. A live in carer would not come cheap, or do you mean a family member?

teachergirl

hi bryanb
Hopefully a live in carer will never be needed but my sister is an occupational therapist and she just went through a list of Pros and cons,of the house and one of them was the spare rooms could be used for a live in carer. As much as possible I would hope it would be one of us and as it is just around the corner this would make it easy.

Catblue

You seem to have thought about this quite a bit and it does seem like it could be quite a reasonable solution to your parents' accommodation needs. Given what you have said, it would definitely be worth thinking things through over the next couple of months before you make a decision. Let your parents settle into the area and see what they think. It won't hurt to go and have a look at a couple of places with your parents in the meantime, either.

If you do eventually go down the route of live-in carers, then they are extremely expensive so you'd need to think how you could finance that if you have to.

And just the last thing to think about (which hopefully would never happen) is that your parents might absolutely insist that they would want to be cared for at home but sometimes people really do need specialist care which cannot be done at home unfortunately.

It is really great that your family are planning for the future like this and I wish you and your parents all the best.

dopester

teachergirl wrote: »

Dopester I do understand what you are saying and I know that we cannot predict everything that will happen. The main thing here is not about making a profit but about having your family really close to you for the rest of their lives. It's a ten year plan, which if there are unforseen circumstances we may have to rethink, but if it works then my parents and my family will be able to enjoy this time together with ease, dropping in on each other but also having our privacy.It is a gamble but I think the benefits will outweigh the risks.

Have you got any room on your property to build like a garage/granny-flat?

Not knocking your idea because I think you're set to make a profit in the long-term. Totally the reverse actually. Asking you to factor in stonking percentage losses in value on your own home, and the leveraged property. Does that make the benefits outweigh the risks?

You've only just jokingly tested the water with an EA and got indication a seller would be prepared to accept an offer of £30 odd thousand pounds under asking. 12/24 months on... you think prices will be stable? Standby for the education.

Fire_Fox

A larger than necessary house means larger than necessary bills. You also have not discussed what would happen if you and OH split up, you may need to sell both houses. Why don't you leaflet other properties in your town that would suit your parents lifestyle and budget to see if the owners want to sell?

teachergirl

Thanks fire fox...we have already thought of that and will be doing that. Don't think OH and I will split up...we have been together for more than 20 years...plus he says it would be far too much hassle and he hasn't got the energy!!!!;)(Yes I know everyone thinks that as well.)