Advice required re needing to be at home with sick child.

rachnbri

I'm totally stuck and hoping that someone can offer some advice or maybe even just support.

Last weekend my son's vision started to go very suddenly. He woke up on Saturday morning saying his left eye was blurry and by Monday both eyes were blurred and he could barely see. I took him to the optician on Tuesday evening and they said that they thought he was short sighted but the lenses weren't helping so referred him to the hospital. He was seen on wednesday (they take children with sudden deteriation of sight very seriously) and they said that he's not in fact short sighted but they think that the muscles in the eye which control focus have gone into spasm. He had to go back on Thursday to have eye drops which paralyse his eyes. These last for 3 days and he has to have another lot on Sunday so is now effectively blind until next Thursday when he's back at the hospital.

Under normal circumstances I'd leave him home if he was unwell as he's a very sensible 12 year old and I can be home in 10 minutes if I need to be, however as he can't see I really can't leave him alone.

My employer has special leave arrangements for family emergencies but these are at managers discretion and my manager has decided to let me have the Wednesday and the Thursday as special leave but no more than that.

I don't have enough annual leave left to cover this period and, as I said, can't leave my son alone, so what I'm left with is going to the doctor and getting a sick note for stress. This isn't really stretching the truth. The hospital have said that my son's condition could have been brought on by a very stressful situation which we are having to deal with involving his biological father and this is causing me a great deal of stress also. In addition to that I've recently had to cope with my Mum having a serious illness and my Dad having been attacked and not coping terribly well with that. Since I got the call from my manager today I've been constantly tearful and shaking.

So, apart from having a bit of a rant about the situation, I'm wondering if anyone can offer any advice.

chnelomi

sorry to hear of all your troubles i hope all turns out well. i have no info i think would be of use to you, again sorry.

I just wanted to remind you to bump your message when the site is back up tomorrow. i'm sure someone can help.

Emmzi

have you asked for *unpaid* special leave, this may be more forthcoming

is there any way you could keep on top of work from home

rachnbri

Emmzi wrote: »

have you asked for *unpaid* special leave, this may be more forthcoming

is there any way you could keep on top of work from home

Unfortunately I just can't afford to lose a weeks pay.

I need access to specific IT systems for my job so can't work from home at all - if I could that would be the best option as I know I'm going to have shedloads to catch up on when I get back!!

Emmzi

for info my employer never pays special leave so i suspect this is quite common. Any family that can help with childcare?

magic57

Sorry to hear about this very difficult situation. Your son clearly needs you as he can't see. If you have no family or friends to help out with him I think your only option is to get a sick note for yourself for stress or similar or to ask for unpaid leave. If you are upset and shaking your doctor should be able to advise and support you anyway.
Good luck and I hope your son makes afull recovery soon.

SomeBozo

You have had 2 days off "special leave" which is quite generous.

Special leave with regard to sick children is to go home and arrange care, not to do to care. The test of faireness is that if the event was unexpected and sudden.

You have had 2 days off to sort it out, its not your employers fault you have no leave left.

Your employer can't afford to pay you to not to come to work.

I think your employer has been fair, so either unpaid leave or you ask someone else to provide care.

Bozo

sammyjammy

rachnbri wrote: »

Unfortunately I just can't afford to lose a weeks pay.

I need access to specific IT systems for my job so can't work from home at all - if I could that would be the best option as I know I'm going to have shedloads to catch up on when I get back!!

Are you a civil servant? It sounds like you might be, have you spoken to your countersigning manager and explained the situation.

This "managers descretion" stuff makes me so mad, there are some really understanding and fair managers and then there are not.

Hope you sort things out.

Sam

SomeBozo

sammyjammy wrote: »

This "managers descretion" stuff makes me so mad, there are some really understanding and fair managers and then there are not.

But only a manager knows the operational issues of the business, the pressures, plus has a relationship with the employee and hence needs to flexibile / tow the line with certain employees.

Bozo

zzzLazyDaisy

You have no legal right to time off to care for your sick child.

As another poster has said, the only legal right is for time off in an unforseen emergency, to give you time to make arrangements for a dependent to be cared for.

However, that does not help you in this situation - I can see that you would want to be with your child who has suddenly gone blind. What a terrible thing to happen.

One thing to consider - if paid leave is at the manager's discretion, do you know of colleagues in similar situations who have been given longer time off work? Is your work particularly difficult to cover? Whilst the decision may be in the manager's discretion, the employer does have a duty to exercise discretion fairly, and not make arbitrary or capricious decisions.

But ultimately, if you cannot find a way round all this, then yes, if your GP will sign you off sick, then that is probably your best way forward.

LinasPilibaitisisbatman

Why exactly is it you think your employer and colleagues should suffer for your lifestyle

They have already been generous and given you ample opportunity to arrange alternative care and you plan to repay this by conning a sick note out of the doctor too get your own way.

As for no annual leave. Could you confirm what your annual leave period is.