Showing people round house - taking shoes off

Castleman

GracieP wrote: »

I hope you only do this in the houses of people who you know really well. I'd hate it if someone came into my house for dinner or a party and just removed their shoes. It's over-familiar. If it was a good friend who had come over to watch a movie and wanted to get comfy, it would be fine, equally if they were staying in the house overnight. But under any other circumstances I'd actually find it disrespectful, just because you like something done in your house doesn't mean that others don't feel the exact opposite.

Basic manners are nearly always a variation of 'copy the host'! Applies in this case too.

GracieP

Castleman wrote: »

Basic manners are nearly always a variation of 'copy the host'! Applies in this case too.

True in social occasions. But in a case where you are selling a house you have to put your own feelings aside.

I'm not sure how it works with part-exchanges, but if EA's are involved I'd recommend the owner gets out of the house and let the EA do the viewings. I didn't do a single viewing when my house was on the market. You can't let your feelings and sense of ownership get in the way of letting the potential buyer imagine the house as theirs.

Craftyscholar

Castleman wrote: »

Normally I kick my shoes off the minute I walk in the door, but if having people over for something more formal (e.g. dinner party, business meeting, party, wake or the like) will keep shoes on (I mean, people in suits and socks?). It's also a generation thing - very few people in their 70's, 80's etc will take their shoes off, even in their own home.

If I walk in with someone and take my shoes off (I tend to kick them off in a not-obvious way) most people will ask if they should take theirs off too. Then you can say yes.

To be honest though, I would consider house selling to be in the formal category and expect people to keep their shoes on even if most of the time everyone who visits our house takes their shoes off.

Just deal with it!

I was very surprised by the reactions to this question and I was also wondering if it is a generational thing.

I always wipe my feet going into someone elses house (and my own) but would never think to take my shoes off.

OK one friend I used to go dog walking with if we went back to her house then I would dump muddy shoes in the porch, but only under those circumstances.

I was once asked visiting a friend of a friend, who I didn't know. I complied but felt uncomfortable until I left.

vickyp_2

We were asked to remove our shoes when looking round a house. Didn't bother us - the carpets were very pale and in very good nick, so I can understand why they'd want to keep them that way for other viewings.

GracieP

Craftyscholar wrote: »

I was very surprised by the reactions to this question and I was also wondering if it is a generational thing.

I don't think it's a generational thing. I'm 30 and I have never as a child or an adult been asked to take my shoes off or had a visitor ask should they take their shoes off, with the exception of the house I viewed. None of my friends, aunts, uncles, cousins, neighbours or colleagues (older or younger) have ever asked anyone to remove their shoes on any occasion I've ever been in their house. Even my fussiest aunts have never suggested it to anyone.

It's also made no difference dependent on social class or type of house. Whether it be a student flat or the house of a film producer, brand new houses or old family piles with blue plaques on the outer walls, it's made no difference.

I suspect that it has much to do with the current fashion for light coloured carpets more than anything.

queenieplum

This has to be the best thread EVER!! So enjoyable!! I may get potential buyers to dress in blue to blend in with the carpets hahahahahahaha

Valli

3KIDSNOMONEY wrote: »

I have got to show some potential buyers around my house today. I have a real thing about shoes in houses, does anybody think that it is strange or rude to ask them to take off their shoes when they come and have a look round. thanks

err yes I think it would be strange AND rude TBH
(not least because my feet are - um - less than fragrant TBH)
Most people will wipe (assuming you have a mat, that is.)

Cryptical

If you were a naturist, would you expect people to take off their "outside clothes" when they enter your house?!? Just because your comfortable naked doesn't mean everyone is!

I've been fascinated by the small pockets of people with this "shoes off" obsession since I first encountered it after moving from Devon to the Midlands.

In the south west, removing shoes when you enter someone's home is unheard of! In fact, it's considered weird and often viewed as a rather working-class trait. None of my friends or family do it or expect visitors to. My cousin's boyfriend was the talk of the family when he took his shoes off while visiting. The poor guy thought he was being polite.

In my experience, the further north and/or east you go in England, the more likely you are to encounter this "shoes off" phenomenon. And the smaller the house (think tiny semi-detached/terrace shoebox) or the more working-class the family's background, the more likely it is they'll have inflated ideas about their grubby little palace and expect shoes off.

Where I've been asked to remove my shoes, most of the houses were filthy! It's a case of wipe your feet on the way out & bin those brand new socks when you get home!

The weirdest time was when I was asked to remove my shoes and socks by some foot fetish woman who insisted that the dark socks (apparently brand new M&S socks) of another guest had stained her new cream carpet and she couldn't risk the dye of my socks making another stain.

I don't mind taking my shoes off (even though it's weird), but if I'm not asked to and then half an hour later I see the person notice my shoes on and think stuff to themself in their head (even though they don't say anything), that bugs me because I'm hypersensitive to what other people think about me and as the shoes off thing is foreign to me, it's not about being rude or inconsiderate.

Anyway, the fact is that many people carry HPV (human papilloma virus) and various bacteria on their feet and socks which will transfer to both hard floors and carpets and then to other people, so it's biologically more hygienic to keep shoes on!

seven-day-weekend

There is a lady near where I live in Spain (she is not Spanish) - she is the only person I know in Spain who actually has a carpet! She always wants people to take their shoes off. I don't wear socks for much of the year in Spain, which means I have to walk around in my bare feet. I persoanally think that is worse than my shoes!

The carpet is also one of those hard hessian ones and is really uncomfortable to walk on.

So obviously her carpet means more to her than her visitors.

Cissi

Cryptical wrote: »

the smaller the house (think tiny semi-detached/terrace shoebox) or the more working-class the family's background, the more likely it is they'll have inflated ideas about their grubby little palace and expect shoes off.

Where I've been asked to remove my shoes, most of the houses were filthy! It's a case of wipe your feet on the way out & bin those brand new socks when you get home!

I have to disagree with you there I'm in the South East (West London) and definitely not in a working-class area (the average "terrace shoebox" would cost £600k upwards). Around here it's the norm to leave your shoes by the door (not socks though, I've never heard of that one before, and most people keep sandals etc on if they have bare feet and it's dry outside). And this is even though most houses have wooden floors. In my experience it's definitely the houses where shoes are worn indoors that have filthy floors.

But I can't speak for other areas of the country - we have a number of friends in Devon and I've never seen anyone wear shoes in their houses, but then they've all moved back from a number of years in the London area so probably aren't typical. I take your point about the cultural differences though - I grew up on the Continent (Switzerland) where wearing shoes indoors would be seen as completely barbaric, so I guess I'm just not used to it