Need advice re fiances debts

Valli

actually he might well have had his lightbulb moment for it is he and not the OP trying to contact CCCS...

moneysaver12

TotallyBroke wrote: »

I think you need to tell your OH to write to all the unsecured debt people offering them £1 per month on the debt.
He then needs to cut back on everything to the bare minimum. What was the secured loan spent on? By the sounds of it it was not a home improvement loan.
He needs to sell everything, so sofa (keep 1 chair) any spare beds, dining room tables and chairs. Vases, ornaments, tv (get one off freecycle as a replacement).
Get as much money into the home as possible and pay off the debts, I would start with Great Universal just to get rid. You then need to work out if you can overpay on the secured loan or not. If you can not then pay off other debts asap, use the spare money you then have to get the house into a saleable condition and get rid of it.

I do not want to be the bearer of bad news but none of this will be achievable before your wedding. So you may have to delay your wedding until he can help pay for it.

Securred loan was to pay off credit cards that he had, but wasn't enough to pay them all of, he did then cut the cards up. Thats what cccs have adviced him to do too about the one pound payment and he is going to do that.

He is trying to sell his tv and other things, we are going to do a car boot next month. He is moving in with me now, so that will half the bills for him. but he is going to have to pay most of the rent. He can't sell the house unless he can get about 50k for the securred loan, which he can't do, thats why cccs have adviced him to do voluntary respossion.

With the wedding, that has been paid for by using tesco club card deals. I will advice him to get rid of the catalogue. Thankyou very much for your help.

moneysaver12

dumpy wrote: »

Pease be very, very careful.

You've said that he has run up cards, taken out loans, run up cards taken out loans etc etc.

It sounds like someone who hasn't really had a light bulb moment. At the moment it sounds like you are sorting this out so he still isn't really taking responsibility for the debt. Is he really serious about sorting it out?

I know you love him, I loved my ex but he was completely incapable of realsing that money needed to be paid back and cards did not equal free money. Thankfully I didn't do what a lot of people do and take on his debt so when we split up I was not responsible for his spending. And before anyone jumps on me, I paid all the bills, mortgage, council tax etc etc he spent his on coffee, snacks, golf and cars he couldn't afford.


You have exams at the moment, concentrate on them and let him get the ball rolling with CCCS. It will test how committed he is to sorting this all out.

And whatever you do, do NOT take out any joint financial proucts with him or take on any of his loans.

Thankyou very much for your help, i think that he has had his light blub moment now, he is being active with the debt problem and has spoken to cccs. I won't take on his debts and he knows this. He is serious about sorting this out, he knows that it needs to be done. Im trying to just let him deal with it at the moment and have been revising today, just having a break now, so thought i would check to see if there are any replys. I do show him this thread so he can read it too.

debtexodus

Hi money saver12

Has he tried negotiating with his creditors? Even if he lowers some of his outgoing a little it may help him restruction some of his debts. He can do this alone or with the help of a debt management company. Beware, however, because not all are free and the ones that aren't can charge an a monthly fee. The one below doesn't, instead it just charges a one off fee and all future payments go to creditors.

Ideally you should use a free debt management company but waiting lists are pretty lengthy these days, still worth investigating though.

moneysaver12

dancingfairy wrote: »

I agree with Totally broke. He can just about avoid meltdown. He needs to claw back that 215 ish pounds overspend and offer all creditors 1 pound and try and think of everyway he can to get to get some money in.
If he could get his food down to 100 pounds a month and reduce his entertainment to 50 pounds a month thats 250 a month and trim everything else and start tackling those debts.
The other alternatives I can see are - trying to sell the house (negotiating with secured loan people and pointing out he needs to sell).
Bankruptcy possibly?
Would definitely try a debt charity for advice though.
df

Thankyou very much for your help, i have to reply to everyone in a new post as i can't finger out how to multi quote.

We have been looking at cutting down the food budge and with him moving in we are aiming to spend 100 for both of us. I think that he is going to have to go bankrupt, at the moment he is looking at all options as we know that this is not a route to be taken lightly. I think that he has learnt from this and won't be getting in to debt again. He has been living with out credit cards now for over a year so it can be done.

moneysaver12

debtexodus wrote: »

Hi money saver12

Has he tried negotiating with his creditors? Even if he lowers some of his outgoing a little it may help him restruction some of his debts. He can do this alone or with the help of a debt management company. Beware, however, because not all are free and the ones that aren't can charge an a monthly fee. The one below doesn't, instead it just charges a one off fee and all future payments go to creditors.

Ideally you should use a free debt management company but waiting lists are pretty lengthy these days, still worth investigating though.

He hasn't tried negotiating, really he has been burying his head about it and ignoring it till recently. I will show him this and get him to look in to it. Thankyou very much for your help.

Flylady_Flower

Valli wrote: »

I would also question emergency fund - if £50 is being put to one side to pay for emergencies/rainy day well OP tell your fiance it is raining NOW.
Searching me is right - need to cut down on food (buying lunches?) and entertainment. With a mortgage so low this is quite a sad SOA tbh.

Valli's right about the rainy day fund, why not pay that off a card each month instead - it's raining now and if there is a torrential downpour that you need to buy a boat for, at least then the card would have some balance on it that you could use. (Ignore this as I've just seen what you've done with it anyway )

Obvious places for savings are as Searching me said - food and entertainment - try only going out once a month, have nice meals in together or friends round (bring a bottle) and you supply the snacks or something so you're not just in staring at the TV - visit places (free ones) depending what's on in your area as I know what my hubby is like if he's caged up and can't go out so check out the free papers to see what's about.

On the mortgage front, what about renting out his house if he is moving in with you? Selling at the moment is hard and there are lots of costs involved before it goes through too - not sure if he could get those costs together up front as things stand for him so this could be a good option? Just seen he can't sell because of the secured loan, but surely the loan would be paid off if the house was sold? Is the house not worth as much as the mortgage and secured loan? I know renting would not pay all of it, but would it cover the majority? At the moment he is paying all of it himself isn't he? Maybe you could do a 6 month let and point out the bits you will repair once they are in, using the money from the rent to do this plus - and this is a toughie - ask any friends you have that can do the kind of work you need for favours or give them [strike]your[/strike] his time in return? depends on what needs doing, but if you are selling and these aren't done, you will loose money there too. Also, the lodger idea sounds good.

Could you also speak to the secured loan debtors to see if you could extend the loan time so the payments go down? I know this is extreme but it would maybe free up some spare cash?

I don't know if they still do it, but our local council once helped me sort out my finances because of council tax debt - basically, they helped me do a SOA then work out what I had left and showed me how to tell people what I could pay them, if they didn't like it, tough really, but they all accepted it (well, they bumped it up a bit in places, but it wasn't much as if you have nothing left they can see that and they would rather have something than nothing) plus they stopped my interest (3-6 months at a time until my circumstances changed). All the details are on this forum anyway and you've done the hard bit by doing the SOA.

I wish you and your fiancee every success - it is doable if you really decide to do it, but beware - he has to make the decision to change or it will return to how it is now - it's a hard slog and I know myself that when someone keeps saying, "well, you always say you'll do that and you don't" it is really disheartening, but I am sure you will give loads of support to him and he is a very lucky man to have you supporting him. (have just seen the post from Dumpy saying a similar thing, please make sure on this - he does have to make the decision for himself or it just won't work - it's a habit and it's like smoking - the person who smokes has to make the decision or they go back to it... )

Good luck to you both...:A

moneysaver12

Flylady_Flower wrote: »

Valli's right about the rainy day fund, why not pay that off a card each month instead - it's raining now and if there is a torrential downpour that you need to buy a boat for, at least then the card would have some balance on it that you could use.

The rainy day fund he doesn't really have, it was me that put it in when i was doing his SOA, so i took it out. He doesn't have the cards anymore as he cut them up last year and he is in defaults with them.

Obvious places for savings are as Searching me said - food and entertainment - try only going out once a month, have nice meals in together or friends round (bring a bottle) and you supply the snacks or something so you're not just in staring at the TV - visit places (free ones) depending what's on in your area as I know what my hubby is like if he's caged up and can't go out so check out the free papers to see what's about.

Thats a good idea, we will look in to that.

On the mortgage front, what about renting out his house if he is moving in with you? Selling at the moment is hard and there are lots of costs involved before it goes through too - not sure if he could get those costs together up front as things stand for him so this could be a good option? Just seen he can't sell because of the secured loan, but surely the loan would be paid off if the house was sold? Is the house not worth as much as the mortgage and secured loan? I know renting would not pay all of it, but would it cover the majority? At the moment he is paying all of it himself isn't he? Maybe you could do a 6 month let and point out the bits you will repair once they are in, using the money from the rent to do this plus - and this is a toughie - ask any friends you have that can do the kind of work you need for favours or give them [strike]your[/strike] his time in return? depends on what needs doing, but if you are selling and these aren't done, you will loose money there too. Also, the lodger idea sounds good.

The securred loan and mortgage together are more than the house is worth thats why he would have to pay the difference before he could sell it. I don't think that he would get enough from renting it to cover the loan and also we really don't have the money for fees etc, and it would take many months of rent to be able to pay for the celings fixing and water occasionally leaks through in the kitchen. We don't know anyone who could do the repairs for us.

Could you also speak to the secured loan debtors to see if you could extend the loan time so the payments go down? I know this is extreme but it would maybe free up some spare cash?

I have just had a look at the statement cccs have done for him and with the money he will need to pay for living expenses and then the securred loan on top he is over 600 short, so doesn't even have enough to pay any of the other debts.

I don't know if they still do it, but our local council once helped me sort out my finances because of council tax debt - basically, they helped me do a SOA then work out what I had left and showed me how to tell people what I could pay them, if they didn't like it, tough really, but they all accepted it (well, they bumped it up a bit in places, but it wasn't much as if you have nothing left they can see that and they would rather have something than nothing) plus they stopped my interest (3-6 months at a time until my circumstances changed). All the details are on this forum anyway and you've done the hard bit by doing the SOA.

I will get him to look into this.

I wish you and your fiancee every success - it is doable if you really decide to do it, but beware - he has to make the decision to change or it will return to how it is now - it's a hard slog and I know myself that when someone keeps saying, "well, you always say you'll do that and you don't" it is really disheartening, but I am sure you will give loads of support to him and he is a very lucky man to have you supporting him. (have just seen the post from Dumpy saying a similar thing, please make sure on this - he does have to make the decision for himself or it just won't work - it's a habit and it's like smoking - the person who smokes has to make the decision or they go back to it... )

Good luck to you both...:A

Thankyou very much for your help. He has made the decision for himself, he has realised that he needs to sort this situation out. Which is good.

Flylady_Flower

moneysaver12 wrote: »

Thankyou very much for your help. He has made the decision for himself, he has realised that he needs to sort this situation out. Which is good.

I'm sure everyone would love to help you, but both of you seem to be going really well with this - I'm glad he has made the decision for himself too, it's hard to do and very brave to admit you need help - well done to him!

Sorry, I read your explanation about the rainy day savings after I posted and I understand why you can't sell now.

As for checking out with the council, I recon you've done the right thing getting help with CCCP and they will help you just as well as the council helped me... and the £600 shortfall that you have just found - let them sort that for you too. It might not be the way to go, or even the way they sort it for you, but honestly, when we went bankrupt, it was the best thing we ever did - the weight off us was palpable and I'm sure my health improved after because we were under so much stress before that, arguments, everything - it really helped us, and when this is all sorted out, you will both feel a great weight lifted...

All the best with this and with your wedding... :A

moneysaver12

Flylady_Flower wrote: »

I'm sure everyone would love to help you, but both of you seem to be going really well with this - I'm glad he has made the decision for himself too, it's hard to do and very brave to admit you need help - well done to him!

Sorry, I read your explanation about the rainy day savings after I posted and I understand why you can't sell now.

As for checking out with the council, I recon you've done the right thing getting help with CCCP and they will help you just as well as the council helped me... and the £600 shortfall that you have just found - let them sort that for you too. It might not be the way to go, or even the way they sort it for you, but honestly, when we went bankrupt, it was the best thing we ever did - the weight off us was palpable and I'm sure my health improved after because we were under so much stress before that, arguments, everything - it really helped us, and when this is all sorted out, you will both feel a great weight lifted...

All the best with this and with your wedding... :A

Thankyou for your help, i think that he might have to go bankrupt, have been looking at that and iva.