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Go on, who has my money?

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More of a niggling question than a problem; wondered if anyone can advise. I had a problem with a product I bought and asked for a refund. The shop processed the refund back to my debit card yesterday (within 6 business hours of them receiving the product back - now that's service!) and sent me a printout of the refund document, showing the money refunded via whatever computerised process they use.

I wasn't sure when to expect the funds in my account, so this afternoon I rang my bank, NatWest. I explained the refund, told the woman the dates and amount, and the conversation continued in this Alice-in-Wonderland manner -

ME: ...So when can I expect to see the money in my account?
NATWEST: When it comes through you'll see it in your account
ME: Yes, but roughly when will that be?
NATWEST: When the return has been processed it will appear in your account.
ME: I think I grasp that, I would like to know how long that normally takes?
NATWEST: How much was it?
ME: As I said, £1,134
NATWEST: Well, I'm looking at your account now and there's no transaction for that amount
ME: Well... I know. I want to know when it will appear!
NATWEST: You need to contact the party who is refunding the money.
ME: Don't you know approximately how long this process might take?
NATWEST: All I can say is there's no transaction for that amount currently showing. You need to talk to the party who is refunding your money.
ME: How will they know?
NATWEST: You need to contact them.
ME: So where is it? The money. Who has it?
NATWEST: You need to contact the party who is refunding your money.
ME: That's great. Bye.

So basically that's still my question. Who has my money, what are they doing with it, and when will it appear in my account? I don't expect the process to be instant (although I don't see why it shouldn't be) but whenever I pay something out it disappears immediately. So I guess the money's not in the retailer's account. And it's not in my account. So where is it?

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