MSE Pregnancy Club Birth Stories

Maddie

Ok, I will try to remember as much as I can...

Our little boy was due on Monday 12th November and I hadn't had many signs other that a few braxton hicks a couple of weeks before. On Wednesday 14th I woke up at about 5:30am getting contractions about every 9 minutes. I spent the day with contractions coming on for a while then dying down again. Had a fairly normal day - not much of an appetite but managed to eat some pancakes and get some last minute housework done.

We had wanted to keep it secret when I went into labour to avoid relatives from starting to worry etc, but that didn't go to plan as we ended up with our SIL and a friend coming over and both mums knowing.

At night my contractions got heavier and closer together. I suffer from IBS and this was affecting me too and giving me quite a lot of pain. OH rang the hospital around 4am when they were about every 5min and they said to take paracetamol and ring back in an hour. An hour later I made OH call back and I really wanted to go in. The thought of driving in during contractions was horrible and I wanted it over and done with, also I just wanted to be able to get to where I needed to be and relax. They told OH that if I wanted to come in he could bring me but sounded like they knew I'd be heading home again. We went in at about 5am and on examination I was fully effaced but basically not dilated at all and was pretty disappointed!

So back home we went and I got in the bath with OH pouring water over my bump. Spent a few hours in there. By now I had no appetite at all and if I tried to eat anything I would nearly throw up on the next contraction. Knowing now how long it would take I really should have eaten more and tried to get more sleep than I managed (I could only doze between contractions but should have spent longer doing this). I was also having difficulty weeing so took to crouching over a jug rather than sitting on the loo which seemed easier.

I could see the appeal of a home birth at this point - the idea of just being in one place and having the midwife come out to you and then able to give you her full attention sounds much better than worrying about when you should leave for hospital and whether its going to end up being in the middle of rush hour. Our house really isn't fit for a home birth yet but if we have another child I think I'll have one.

My contractions remained fairly irregular throughout the day, they'd be regular for an hour or so then slow down again, also some were strong but others not. In the evening I got in the bath again and they came on more regularly. Once my hourly average was below 5min apart I got OH to ring the hospital again and we went in again at about 2am. I was examined and told I was 2cm so back home we went and back in the bath where I could get the odd minute of sleep on my bath pillow and OH could get some sleep on the bathroom floor.

By the Friday I was getting quite tired and emotional. OH wanted me to go for a walk but I really didn't want to leave the house so let him drag me round the garden a bit. At about 2pm he rang the triage number. As it was working hours he rang the midwife one instead of the ward. She asked to speak to me which I really didn't want to have to do and when she asked me if I'd had a contraction whilst I was on phone I just started crying and had to pass her back to OH. It upset me so much firstly because just having to talk to her stopped my contractions and also because it made me feel like she was testing me and didn't believe just how bad my contractions were (we had been told at antenatal classes they would do this). At this point even my OH had had enough so rang the labour ward and told them we were coming in. Got there around 3:30pm just missing rush hour and was examined again - 4cm - so relieved although we had both been hoping it would be higher.

I wanted to go in the pool room but being consultant led following fertility treatment I wasn't allowed. Got straight in the bath and OH asked for a jug to pour water over me again. Midwife then got permission from the consultant for me to be transferred to the midwife led unit so I could go in the pool. Just as we were leaving the room we were told OHs mother was there :eek:. Another reason we didn't want to tell people I was in labour was because we had been warned at antenatal classes of relatives not being able to help but to come down to the hospital. We'd told MIL this and she'd sworn she'd never do that :rotfl:. Saw her briefly in the hall as we were walking down. To be fair to her she'd called into the hospital on her drive back from work to ask if there was any news and they'd told her to go up to the ward.

Right I think I need OH to help me remember the rest of the details so will carry on once he wakes up!

Ok, I've finally got round to finishing this off, will try to be concise so that I actually get to the birth!...

There was a change in midwives as we moved into the birthing room and by now it was about 8pm so I was re-examined. The student midwife thought I was about 5cm but said she would see what the midwife thought. Midwife said I was still 4cm!:eek:

I then used the pool but didn't find it that good since it wasn't as warm as a bath and i think i found it hard to find a comfy position since it was so big. I've since seen a photo of someone else in the same bath as it was much fuller so maybe it would have been better deep. At some point I had to get out as I was overheating and then later couldn't use it as my contractions were too slow so I hardly used it really.

When I was next examined I was still only 5cm so we were told to try to get some sleep. I decided to try the gas and air but found it confused the breathing exercises I was doing and was also going to be no help whilst trying to sleep since i would always be late taking that first breath.

The midwife suggested Pethidine to allow me to get a but of sleep. I hadn't expected to use any pain relief other than possibly gas & air, but the birth was so far off at this point that it wasn't going to affect the baby once born and it seemed like a sensible option and we decided to take it. That allowed me about 3-4 hours sleep, although it was only after the injection that I was told the foetal heart rate would need to be checked every 15 minutes, so it was broken sleep. I could just about feel my contractions whilst it had effect, but only to tell they were there, there was no pain at all, and I just felt relaxed and sleepy.

The next day things continued to go slowly. We had another new midwife who was as lovey as the last two. At one point my mum rang the ward - she'd been told by my MIL the night before that I was on my way to the birthing pool so had thought I was about to give birth and was now getting worried!

I had been finding it difficult to wee throughout the labour but it was now getting worse so I had to have a catheter inserted to empty it in case that was slowing things down. By this point I was so tired starting to fall asleep on my feet after each contraction and my eyes were going of in different directions when i tried to look at my OH.

Eventually the midwife broke my waters and said my contractions should speed up and get stronger after this. Instead they pretty much stopped completely!

So in the end I was taken back to the consultant led ward to be put on a syntocinon drip to force my contractions. The midwife had said I should just need a few good strong contractions to get me there as my cervix was very elastic, so it was another disappointment when the consultant said he'd be back in 4 hours to check how I was progressing! I was very uncomfortable lying on the bed so they found me a birthing ball to bounce on leaning on the bed. I was told I might need an epidural as it would get more painful but managed to get by with just my breathing. The pain didn't really get much worse until the end when I got what I eventually realised was the 'urge to push'. For me this wasn't an urge but just a more intense pain like constipation at the peak of each contraction.

When I realised this might be the end I pushed a bit standing up, but wasn't really sure so asked to be examined again. Was given the go ahead to push so got up on the bed on all fours and started to push. It seemed like a relief to not have to do the breathing exercises anymore and I don't really remember this bit being painful, although I know I made a lot of noise so it must have been.

This part only took me about half an hour and it was quite amazing to feel him coming out. My OH stayed with me at the top of the bed but had a look to see the hair when it was visable and also got to see his head popping out. I remember asking my OH what colour his hair was partly to help me believe I really was nearly there. For the very last contraction whilst his head was out there was another long pause between contractions even despite the hormone drip.

Then one last push and he was out! When I turned round to see him my main emotion was relief that it was finally over! I've since read that syntocinon stops you from having the euthoria and bonding feelings that oxytocin give so perhaps that was why - not that I had particular problems with bonding, it just didn't hit me straight away as it didn't really seem real. I had stitches but didn't have much of a cut so in the end it all went fairly smoothly. I then spent two nights in hospital as he was slow to latch on but it was quite helpful to have help on hand all night if needed. He's now 7 weeks old and it still seems bizarre that we have a son

missbunbury

Baby Alice born 24th November 2012 weighing 6 lb 15 oz. So here goes with the whole extremely long story:

I had spent two days grumbling that my Braxton Hicks had started feeling a bit sore and "period-y" but it was nothing dreadful, not as painful as the bad back I had from weeks 20-30, for example. I just thought it was probably to do with the baby engaging or something.

Then on Saturday the 24th I woke up at nine am desperate to get to the loo, which was by no means a new experience! Ran in and as I "let go" I realised that it wasn't urine coming out of me, it was a slightly thicker fluid and coming from elsewhere (I will say at this point that I intend to give gory details so only read on if you can handle it!) It was flowing out like urine but where it was coming from felt like a period, if you see what I mean. At this point I had had no pains that I was aware of.

Went in to wake up other half and told him I thought my waters had gone. He suggested I come back to bed to get some more sleep (I'd been up late) but when I tried I found more water kept trickling so I got up and messed about with pads for a bit, I soaked four or five in half an hour and kept putting them in nappy sacks to save for the midwives to sniff!

Other half was changing the sheets while I rang the hospital. They asked about pains, by this point I felt period-y again. They suggested I come in at eight that evening whether anything had happened or not. They also tried to manage my expectations by telling me it can be several days between waters going and baby putting in an appearance!

So by now it's about half ten. We had missed bin day and I had no painkillers so I sent OH to take the bin bags to the tip and buy some paracetamol. While he was gone, I suddenly started feeling real pain in my bits/womb/tummy region. They were strong enough to stop me in my tracks and felt like waves, when one started I wanted to jump up and walk, almost as if I wanted to get away from it! They were about ten minutes apart and although I wasn't timing their length I thought they were lasting about ten seconds.

OH got back about half eleven. By this point I was pacing the house and stopping to whimper or moan with each contraction. I tried going back to bed but it was worse there, every time one came I wanted to thrash about and I was worried about the neighbours hearing me!

At one point OH found me kneeling on the stairs doing some howling. He was rubbing my back which was nice, my breathing pretty much went out the window though, I was in too much pain to concentrate on it. I asked OH to run me a hot bath and I remember kneeling against a big pile of blankets on the couch moaning and thinking "well I am doing really badly at this, it's really early days and I am whining and crying already, I might think about getting the TENS machine out soon."

OH came down from running a bath and he was worried the contractions seemed close so he got out the timer app. They were two minutes forty five seconds apart and lasting fifty seconds! OH phoned the hospital, who spoke to me. I told them "I'm really struggling" so they said to come in and they would have a look. To be honest they didn't sound too bothered.

By now it was half past one in the afternoon. I was in my pyjamas still. We got me in the car and set off for the half hour drive, it was absolutely pouring with rain. I remember thinking "ok, I am going to have to get through at least ten contractions in the car probably" and was trying to count them but I lost track after six. OH was looking at me in the mirror every time I started whimpering and reaching back to try to comfort me, I kept telling him off "watch the ROAD!" I was also seeing other drivers looking at me funny and I felt really embarrassed! I was drumming my feet on the car floor and squirming about while I went "ow ow owwwww" with each one!

We parked in the special lay-by at the hospital and got out in the rain. I was still walking ok, hanging on to OH. A man directed us to the right door, he could obviously tell what was happening!

When we got to the reception in the midwife-led unit there was a woman at the desk who said "oh dear, I'll be no good to you, I don't work in this unit!" then she answered the phone and started chatting! By now I was in a state, I kept moaning "why won't someone help me?" and poor OH didn't know what to do! Finally a midwife bustled along and took me into an assessment room, she kept telling me "I'm not really here, I work on the consultant ward upstairs."

It was probably half two by this point. We got me on the bed and I clearly remember seeing a plastic chart thing for cervix measuring, it looked like a spaghetti measurer and the 10 cm hole looked ENORMOUS! The midwife had a look and put a loose monitor pad on my tummy to hear baby's heart. It seemed good but the pad kept slipping and when it did the machine would beep which was really scaring me!

Another midwife came to look and they muttered together which was also freaking me out. I wanted the pool but nobody was running it. Then I said "can't I have some pethidine?" and one midwife went to get it but the other didn't want me to have it for some reason. They kept saying I was fully effaced but I wasn't really taking it in!

Then they told me they were going to transfer me up to the consultant-led ward. I was utterly terrified now and kept adding what was wrong, they were saying everything was fine but I kept accusing them of lying to me! I was using gas and air by now but I didn't think it was working.

They wheeled me up, I had a big rubber bean-bag on the bed which I wouldn't let them take off me and one student was helping me with the gas and air. I kept asking "am I ok? Is the baby ok? What's going on?" OH tells me he wasn't too scared because he, unlike me, had understood the problem was my monitor kept slipping and they were wanting to put a clip on baby's head.

We got up there and were back with the lady I had had first of all who worked upstairs. She put the clip in, I felt a bit more lucid now. This was the first point at which I actually understood they were saying I was in the second stage, I kept saying "oh my God am I really pushing?!"

I was wanting to push on all fours but they kept telling me I wasn't doing very well at it, and this got me cross and I was telling them to shut up! My mum arrived at some point around now too and I kept telling her they were all horrible.

Eventually they put me on my back with my legs in stirrups and tried to get me using the gas and air more effectively. The student was doing directed pushing with me and I was really trying, chin on chest and no noise, strain like you're having a pooh! I kept thinking I was actually poohing, they kept saying that's baby coming but to be honest I am pretty sure I was actually poohing too because someone kept wiping my bum!

Mum and OH were one either side of me encouraging me and getting their hands squeezed really really hard, his thumb was purple I found out after. A doctor came in to watch me push. I now realise this man was an evil genius: he threatened me with a ventouse which completely enraged me ("I am NOT having a ventouse!") and with hindsight I am pretty sure it was that that that got me pushing well for the first time.

The student kept on directing me, by now I was shouting "I can't do it" and "just give me a Caesarean"! They were telling me the baby was upset and I needed to get it out within the next few pushes and I was so frightened by now, Mum tells me I never actually said it out loud, but I was thinking "they need to get the baby out or it will die."

The midwife kept talking about getting the baby round the corner then suddenly she said "right,I am really sorry but baby can't quite get out right, I am going to have to cut you." I had argued about practically everything they wanted to do but by now I was so scared I just shouted "do whatever you have to do, please just make die the baby is ok." I'm pretty sure I had an injection of local anaesthetic then when the next push came, I saw her do something with a shiny metal implement which OH reckons were scissors. There was an immediate sense of relief. I don't know whether it was this push or the next one that got the head out. The doctor was there and he looked at the head, I had an instant of panic about the cord and the neck but they seemed not to be worried so I assumed it was ok.

I think the midwife asked me "where do you want us to put baby?" and I think my answer was "OUT GET IT OUT!", I may well have still been demanding a c-section too! One more push and they dumped a baby on my tummy! I remember it looked sort of blue and they took her away quickly which scared me, but her APGARs were 9 then 10 I found out later so it can't have been anything to worry about. OH says he was reassured by the fact that the doctor only glanced at her for about thirty seconds so he knew she must be ok! It was only now I thought to get OH to ask the sex and we all spent a few minutes going "ohhh a girl, brilliant" and they brought her over wrapped up in a towel. My sister arrived about now and we all passed her around, awe-stricken! During this period the midwife stitched me up with a continuous stitch, I don't know whether it has those little ball things at the ends that I've heard about, because three days later I still do not have enough brave left in me to really have a proper look!

I was taken back down to the midwifery led unit to stay overnight at about ten that night, I think if I had really pushed it they would have let me go home that night but I was so shell-shocked that I actually didn't mind staying. The only thing that was a Shane was that all the double rooms were full so OH had to leave us and go home.

All in all I would say it was a good birth, if a bit more rapid than I had expected! My birth plan went out the window entirely bit when the result is so amazing I don't intend to spend time analysing and finding fault, either with myself or with the hospital.

MushyPeas

I'm due my first any day now - EDD 31/12 but likely to come early due to complications. This thread is brilliant, thank you to everyone for sharing their stories.

alizee

Alizee's birth story - Isabel Helen - 8 lbs 7 oz - 12th of May 2012

LATENT PHASE - skip this if you want to get to the happy bit!

It was Monday night/Tuesday morning (around 1 am), the 8th of may, when i started getting tightenings across my bump that were also a bit painful. I was already 5 days overdue after my scan due date (due date by LMP was may 9th). I did nothing about them initially as i was still quite comfortable at home and i had an appointment on Wednesday so i just waited for that.

After a bad night's sleep i went to my appointment. Tightenings were getting more painful and slightly closer together at that point - around 10-12 minutes apart and it was getting very difficult to sleep through them. I had my last scan to check everything was okay - she was estimated to weigh around 8 lbs and everything looked good!

Midwife asked me if i want to be examined and given a stretch & sweep and i said yes. Turns out the cervix was favourable - open a bit and thinning out so she was positive things were going to happen soon! Booked my induction for Thursday 17th of may just in case.

Wednesday night (may 9th) things were still happening - pains were getting quite strong now, varying between 6 and 12 minutes apart. no chance of sleep but i was happy to manage them at home. i gave the ward a ring on thursday morning (may 10th) to let them know and they said if i am still getting the pains by the evening or if they are getting any worse come in to be examined.

Fast forward to friday morning (may 11th) i was in a lot of pain so we decided to go in to get checked out - we didn't take my bags with me as we assumed i was going to be sent home but having had no proper sleep since monday night i was absolutely shattered and desperate for some sort of relief so i could go to sleep! At this point contractions were painful and varying between 6 to 15 mins apart with no break longer than 40 minutes. I had an examination and it appeared i was 2 cms dilated (so the pains were doing something! hurrah!) and th midwife said we can go home now but keep active, she expects to see us back by lunchtime in labour! She told me to come back when they get closer together.

We went back home a lot more positive despite my lack of sleep - went for a very long walk around the countryside hoping it will get things started! Contractions very painful (had to pant through them) between 6 and 19 minutes apart. A bit dissapointed by Friday night when contractions were still not getting closer - i did not want to go back in just to be sent home again.

Friday night/Saturday Morning (may 12th) around 3 am - they were getting very very bad - i relented and let my husband ring the ward - they said fine, come in to be examined. I was in a great deal of pain by this point and after having had very little sleep since monday night i was just in a very bad place. We got to the hospital and i was examined by a midwife only to be told i'm still only 2 cms and cervix hasn't even thinned out fully. I was in so much pain, i asked if they could do anything and they just gave me some codeine. Whilst they were monitoring me they told me they are not picking up the pains as contractions and they are probably just bad SPD pains as they were not regular and further than 5 minutes apart . When i asked if bad spd pains come roughly every 10 minutes and last 1 min 20 sec each they didn't know what to say. I was sent home with a sleeping pill to hopefully let me get some rest. I was told I was not in labour and probably not close to it either and it's quite normal to be 1-2 cms dilated for weeks.

We got home on saturday morning at 5 AM. My poor husband didn't know what to do at this point, he was feeling so bad he couldn't help me. I took the sleeping pill hoping it would help but it only gave me a tight chest and shortness of breath. Pains were far too strong to sleep through. I got up and went for a bath at 6 am as i couldn't lie in bed. I stopped timing the pains as they were nowhere near regular. I was just feeling so hopeless at that point, I got out at 9 Am as water was getting cold and it wasn't helping at all. I remember shutting all the doors between me and DH and just going downstairs so i wouldn't disturb him. It was 11 by the time he came downstairs, he found me leaning over the sofa sobbing between contractions and screaming in pain when each one hit (still irregular - nowhere near 5 minutes apart)I briefly remember a conversation along the lines of dh:"we are going back in right now!" me:"i don't want to go in again, they will send me home! i can't be in labour they are not 5 minutes apart!!" dh:"then i am taking you to a&e this is NOT NORMAL!" As another contraction hit i heard him being quite angry down the phone to someone and then he grabbed my handbag (and me) and shoved me in a taxi.

We got to the labour ward around lunchtime - i had nothing with me apart from my notes - Labour bag was in MIL's car and she was at work! i was told to lie down on the bed and wait for someone. i told them i can't sit down. When they finally came to see me, they told me they will examine me (this time!) even though the contractions weren't close together and i also got told i could have some more codeine if i wanted as they keep the stronger stuff for people that are actually in labour. I was also told "i would know" when the real contractions hit (i was wailing in pain at this point).

After (finally) getting my examination I was told i was 6 Cms dilated and promptly started being fussed around by several midwives and injected with Diamorphine. I vaguely remember saying something about my birth plan and my water birth before dozing off.

ACTIVE LABOUR!!! - friday 12th of may - lunchtime.

Shortly afterwards the diamorphine started working its magic and i was soon laughing down the phone to my friend telling her what a nice day it was outside.I asked to be taken off constant monitoring as i wanted to move around. I was soon flat out on the bed though (i was reminded at this point that i have had little sleep since monday.) only waking up every 10 minutes or so to go on the gas and air during contractions.

After around 2 hrs they examined me again and i had made little progress so they asked me if i would like my waters broken. I had a think about it we agreed it would probably be the best course of action at this point. After my waters had gone my contractions got closer together but still not regular. i was a lot more awake at this point and was in active birthing mode, bouncing on my ball and pacing around the room between contractions.


Things went on like this for a while and at my next examination i was 8 CMS. Unfortunately as contractions were STILL not regular they suggested i go on a hormone drip to intensify them and make this phase shorter and i agreed. They also suggested an epidural due to my tireness and the fact that the hormone drip will make them much stronger. I had a think about it and decided as they were strong enough and this could go on for hours, i would go for the epidural. After a 45 minute procedure to put that huge needle in (something i never ever want to repeat in my life) I thought great - i can rest now and let the drip do the work to dilate me to full!

I was wrong. the epidural only worked on one side so i was still getting awful contractions on my left side. They tried to readjust it (didn't work) and they had a doctor in talking about re inserting it by the time i started feeling the urge to push. I was examined once more and found to be fully dilated, I had the option of re-doing the epidural or starting to push. I opted for pushing!

After a brief explanation about how this pushing stage works i was warned that they would let me go for around an hour, monitor me and if the baby is fine perhaps a bit longer but if she wasn't out yet i would probably need assisted delivery. I think that talk might have changed what happened next as I started pushing at 21:05. Isabel Helen (8 lbs 7 oz) was born at 21:25 after a frantic running around from the midwives as they didn't even have the injection for the placenta ready or the newborn trolley!

Apparently just before her head crowned the (fairly shocked) midwives asked me what i'm feeling! DH said i sounded a bit like MR T when i screamed back at them "PAIN!!!!!!!"

We are falling in love with her a bit more as each day passes and i genuinely don't care about the week of slow labour i had to endure. It was all worth it!

---

LittleMoog

Eleanor Josephine Ann - 27th November 21.41 - 8lb

Went for a sweep on Sunday at 40+12. Cervix was thinned to 1cm and 1cm dilated. Had a slight show in the morning before we went to hospital, which continued more heavily afterwards, and started to lose my plug during the afternoon. We went for a long walk to try and help things along. About 7pm I started getting mildly painful tightenings, 7 mins apart which got more painful as the evening went on and oft to about 4 mins apart by 2am. Phoned labour ward and went in to be assessed - no change to cervix from that morning! Sent home with cocodamol and went to bed, didn't get much sleep but the contractions petered out and stopped about 6am. DH decided to start his paternity leave anyway, as I was booked to go back for induction on the Tuesday morning, so we spent the day having snuggles in bed to try and get the oxytocin going (and cos it was probably the last chance for a while!)w. Contractions began again mid-afternoon, and continued into the night, but were very irregular and mild. Again they petered out overnight, but I didn't get much sleep.

Tuesday 8:30 we went to the day unit for induction - monitored for half an hour before pessary inserted and then sent home for 6 hours. As we got home I had a painful contraction, and put my tens machine on. We went to bed and tried to nap, but my contractions progressed pretty quickly, and by the time we had to go back they were 5 mins apart and lasting 60 seconds. The pain felt really manageable with the tens on up until this point.

We got to the day unit and as soon as I lay down to be monitored everything got really intense. Contractions were every 3 mins lasting 90 seconds each, and I was sent down to labour ward to have my waters broken. By the time we got there I was overwhelmed by the intensity/frequency of the contractions, and asked for an epidural. Used gas and air while they were sorting it out, and it helped, but not enough. Epidural went in about 3.30, but didn't work fully on my right side, so was still on gas as well. Examined at 4, 4cm dilated and waters broken. Examined again at 6 and had reached 7cm. Next examination was due at 8, but my MW was called to an emergency (later found out it was a woman who'd gone to wrong floor in lift, decided to nip to loos before going back down, and gave birth in the bathroom!) So a different MW came to check on me. She was having trouble with the monitors so decided to put a clip on baby's head. This went on about 9, and they kept losing the hb. Once they found it, there were big decelerations with each contraction and they pressed the emergency button as they were going to take me to theatre. DH says he's never seen so many people working so quickly but without panic, but it was still terrifying for him. I was a bit oblivious as they were asking me all sorts of questions, doing consent etc. When we got to theatre hb had stabilised, so they decided to wait a bit to see if they could do forceps as I was dilating quickly (9cm by this point), but a few mins later the hb plummeted again, and they did an emergency section.

Ellie was born at 21.41, and in perfect health we were taken into recovery until about 3am when we went down to the ward. The MW in recovery was great, made sure we got skin to skin, helped me get feeding started and went through everything with us so we understood what happened and why.

This was pretty much the opposite of my ideal birth plan, but it was still a really positive experience. The hospital staff were great, and Ellie is beautiful and healthy. Recovery has been hard, possibly as I had very little sleep from Sunday onwards, but starting to feel better now.

mlbarrett

Tuesday evening started with irregular contractions, which seemed to become more painful and timings between 5-12 mins, lasting 40s to 2 mins (thus no sleep). As there was no set pattern, LRI recommended the usual painkillers and hot baths to deal with the pain. At 4.30am, had a bloody show, followed by loss of plug at 10.30am.

Having already arranged my 40 week mw apt, hubby and I popped to the docs on Weds pm. Had several contractions in the waiting room, leading to several people questioning the staff if I was ok. Mw seemed quite concerned that I was having regular, strong contractions so called the hospital, yet LRI maintained the “wait until contractions are 5min apart” request. As LRI is 10 miles away, mw suggested eating dinner and then pop over to hospital. With the dread of being turned away, I suggested to hubby that we try to relax and wait (another sleepless night).

With the pain unbearable at 1.30am Thurs am, hubby called the hospital to say we wanted to be checked as I was struggling to cope. LRI seemed reluctant as contractions were still in the irregular-ish pattern as previously (just much more painful).

Getting to LRI, the mw didn’t seem overly concerned as she said I could still speak through the pain (she was out of the room during the most painful part of the contractions and only saw the end of them). She said she’d do an internal to determine how far I’d progressed. She must have caught me at the wrong time as I ended up kicking her as a natural reflex as I couldn’t take any more pain. She then told me I was only 1cm dilated and that she’d go and find a doctor to provide some pain relief for me before going home. A student midwife (who was also assessing me ) suggested alternative methods of taking the mind off the pain before going to sort out my paperwork.

Four severe contractions and 15 mins later, we were still waiting for the mw to return, I tried to get off the bed to get ready to leave. Failed miserably to move and hubby them spotted blood that had leaked from me. He went to find mw but came back with student mw. I told her that I couldn’t cope anymore and she went to find someone more senior. Another mw came in and didn’t like to look of my blood loss so examined me again. This time, I was fully dilated (!!! – in 15 mins!!!). As waters were still intact, they were broken and I was moved to delivery suite. Was told I was too far gone for any pain relief, except G&A (which didn’t touch the pain), and there was no time for my GBS antibiotics.

Queue the birth. Not sure how many times I asked if there was pain relief I could take but I got the same answer each time – only G&A and tens(which kept cutting out – carp thing). Had the student mw, who was joined by a doc who had been working in theatre (there seemed to be concerned with my blood loss so sent her in – not idea what happened to mw whom I kicked). At one point, was offered water but I told them I wanted whiskey to numb the pain Then told hubby, we’d only be having more kids if he had them!

Took a while to push baby’s head out but it was lovely to see hubby all emotional. Followed as best I could with the instructions but did end up with 2nd deg tear. Surprised myself with my composure and lack of swearing – the worst that came out of me was “Get this little git out of me!”. Student mw ‘encouraged’ this ‘anger’ and it helped with pushing baby out. She even stayed an hour after her shift to help me deliver – lovely lady.

Didn’t manage to have much of my birth plan; only the use of G&A, for hubby to cut the cord, and to donate the cord and its blood to Anthony Nolan Trust. The rest ended up being just a nice idea. My suitcase remained in the car until after the birth, despite being prepared with all of my bits and bobs for weeks beforehand. But I have a gorgeous baby and have experienced something that will stay with me for the rest of my life. Just hope that if I do it again, I’d like a little more ‘control’, but that’ll never be guaranteed.

savageHK

My due date was the 26th of November 2012 by scan date. Turns out if you have a scan your due date is set by that no matter what - in my case I happened to know when I ovulated, and due date by my calcs was therefore 30th November 2012.

Roll on to the 13th of December 2012 - now term plus 17 days by the scan, or term plus 13 by mine. The community midwives had previously said they'd believe my dates, so I was set for a home birth all the way until the 14th of December with induction on the 17th of December (a Monday) - it was never quite clear what would happen if I went into labour on that weekend though.

At T+10 (their dates) I'd had an appointment at the hospital (as standard) where they did a scan to check the placenta's blood flow, fluid around the baby, size of baby and put me on one of those heartbeat machines to check baby's heartbeat for 20 mins. All was fine so I went home (I refused the sweep as I didn't think I was T+10), and made another appointment for more of the same on the date of my T+10. I'd not had any twinges or anything right up to (and beyond) my due date so I got in touch with an acupuncturist to try inducing labour that way (at least I tried) and ended up having three sessions with him. On the Monday I had my follow up appointment, more baby listening and an attempted sweep which failed as my cervix was still posterior. On the Thursday more of the same, another scan (all still fine) and a successful sweep, and my induction booked in for Saturday morning if nothing happened. I was keen to avoid induction but on balance of risks decided to go with induction if baby was two weeks late by my dates. The community midwives then called me that afternoon after the sweep to tell me that they wouldn't attend my home birth after all, unless it happened that night (when the head of the team was on night duty). I was a bit upset by that as I thought I had another day. Now it was all up in the air - labour on Thursday night allowed at home, labour on Friday means hospital, if nothing by then induction and not even allowed on midwife led unit. I went into town to do some emergency shopping (such as something to labour in - I'd been hoping for a home water birth so wasn't too bothered about being naked, but clearly if I was induced this might take a while and I'd be stuck on a ward with other people and would want to walk around and so on....)

I got home after some depressing shopping, and cooked some supper. Halfway through cooking (7pm Thursday night) my waters went - eureka! That's it, labour has begun... or so I thought. I called the midwives and they came out, confirmed I was 1-2cm dilated. Then went away again! Contractions had now started - like period pain, but not too painful to handle, and I was just glad something was happening! They continued and were pretty regular, at 11pm I decided to try get some sleep as everyone tells you to do in early labour. I dozed from 11 to 1am in our lounge - I'd sent hubby to bed - when I decided that the sleep thing wasn't really working - I was waking for every contraction anyway. I started timing the contractions at 1am using the Contraction Master Timer app (great app, except when you have a break from recording them as it mucks up the averages!), contractions were lasting a minute each and there were 3 in 10 mins. I decided to call the midwives and they came out, but didn't do much to be honest, it was clear that they'd consigned me to the hospital in their minds. They were out for a good two hours or so, and shift change was due at 7. I woke hubby up at about 5am (full nights sleep for him!) and got him to inflate the pool. I then laboured in it for a while. A new midwife was sent out to me at about 9am, and her task was to tell me that they wouldn't attend me in labour (essentially). As my waters had gone it was policy to hook me up to antibiotics after 18 hours (which would be at about 12 midday) and this couldn't be done at home. In hindsight I think that the midwives had erred when they originally agreed to my dates and 'hospital policy' was to go to term + 13 (not 14!) by scan date *only* for a home birth and no further. Mention was made of insurance. They also apparently wanted to monitor me continually with the fetal monitor, which would mean no labouring in the pool either as their monitors weren't waterproof. Anyway, as I was clearly unhappy about being moved to hospital, we agreed a compromise where I could go into the midwife led unit - and labour in water - provided that I hooked up to a trace for a good 20 mins when I first got in.

By the time the new midwife had been sent out to me contractions were spaced a bit further apart but were much more intense. I was beginning to moan through them (didn't think I'd be a moaner, but it helped - mooing like a cow at low frequency). I'd only been using hypnobirthing and the water up till this point. I don't know how dilated I was, as she didn't perform an internal. Again, in hindsight, I think the contractions were painful as part of my cervix was getting stuck and baby was also back to back (which no-one had said!). This was giving me the urge to push and more painful contractions.

We got into hospital probably about 12 midday, and we went straight to the midwife unit (avoiding triage as the home midwives had already examined me). I was having to stop during contractions and hold onto things like they tell you to expect. When we got in they hooked me up to the monitor and (I think) gave me an internal, and I was only 2-3 cm or something. They hooked up the monitor and it was fine although they had some trouble getting it to pick the baby's heartbeat up during contractions. I also stared on the gas and air which worked well for me. I was hooked up to the antibiotics at some point too - it's all gone a bit hazy on the finer details - they came to put the canula in and then I had this thing on my hand which I wasn't sure should go under water. I laboured in the midwife led unit in the pool for quite a while, and my contractions got to the point where I was having the urge to push quite strongly with each contraction (knowing I wasn't anywhere near fully dilated). The midwives told me not to push but it's bloody hard to ignore the urge. In hindsight this was probably due to baby being back to back and/or the lip of my cervix getting stuck, although I wasn't told either at the time which I'm a bit unhappy about. I then remembered reading about 'shaking the apples' in one of the birth books I'd read - I think it was the Ina May Gaskin book - which essentially requires your birthing partner/s to vibrate your thighs/bum during contractions to help you relax. This worked wonderfully although my poor husband was getting a really good workout! Of course to do this I was out the pool again, and didn't get back in. To enable the midwives to do some of their monitoring I had to get out at various points anyway and I can confirm that having a contraction while flat on your back is the most painful position to do it in! I'd also not emptied my bladder for a while so they got worried and inserted a catheter for a bit, that hurt like hell too (and I don't know why I agreed to it, actually).

Eventually I was about 7-8 cm dilated - then there was suddenly meconium in my waters. All hell broke loose at this point (it seemed to me). I was transferred up to the main delivery unit for more monitoring and so on, and the transfer was done in a bed flat on my back again (and without the shaking of apples or gas and air). Once in the main unit they strapped me up to the bloody fetal heart rate monitor thing again and it again couldn't pick up baby's heartbeat during contractions, I was also hooked up to various other machines and drips and who knows what else. The doctor arrived and explained that baby was back to back and that my cervix still had the lip. Because the fetal heart rate monitor wasn't picking up baby's heartbeat, they tried to attach a monitor to his head (which failed), then they decided to take a blood sample from his scalp (which came back fine). They did this again a bit later too. I was given something to speed up my dilation and attempt to get rid of the lip in my cervix. If this didn't work I'd have to have a caesar as they wouldn't let me push with the lip. However, as he was back to back he'd need to be forceps anyway, so I asked for an epidural at this point - largely because I was worried in the back of my mind that they'd suddenly decide they needed to deliver me and knock me out under general for a caesar, where if the epidural was in already I'd only need a top-up. I had the epidural before the stuff to speed up my dilation kicked in, and got to fully dilated and the lip clear. Then I signed up to go into theatre - they'd attempt to rotate him with forceps, but if that didn't work it would be a caesar immediately. When everyone was set up we kicked off - the midwife had the job of telling me when to push as the epidural was topped up to be strong enough for a caesar if needed so I had no feeling below about my nipples! At the first contraction everyone was yelling at me to push, so I did. At the second I think my husband was trying to help me breathe through it but he was told not to by the theatre staff as I needed just to push as hard as possible (so I figured that I wasn't pushing effectively). At the third contraction I had a baby! I wasn't expecting it to be that fast. As a result even though they had given me an episiotomy anyway I ended up with a third/fourth degree tear, and apparently he came out pointing upwards anyway despite the use of the forceps (and weighing 9lb4). They delivered him onto my tummy before whisking him off to the paediatrician to have his airways cleared of meconium and so on. I was then stitched up after having my placenta delivered (not naturally as I'd hoped, but at this point so much of my birth plan was out the window anyway...). The doctor was quite chatty, although I must say this was now past 3am on Saturday morning and I'd been labouring to some degree since 7pm on Thursday so I wasn't particularly chatty myself.... I also apparently lost about a litre of blood at this point which no-one seemed much bothered about at the time (i.e. no-one mentioned it!) but it was on my notes afterward and I was given iron tablets to take as a result.

After all the stitching up was done I was put on recovery ward for about half an hour - during which time the midwives got him to feed (I still couldn't move after the epidural and had various monitors and drips hooked up which meant I really didn't have much to do with this!). Luckily he latched pretty easily and still does now. Then we got carted off to the ward proper, and I was there until 3pm Sunday.

I know the tear sounds bad, but so far to be honest it hasn't given me any problems. I was pretty tender the the morning after the birth, even with the monster pesssary of painkillers I believe I was given in theatre, but since then there has been no pain. I was on painkillers for a few days after but stopped them myself as I thought they were making baby drowsy, but they don't seem to have (he's just contented!) and still no pain. I can feel I have stiches, but they aren't sore. I was also worried about my first bowel movement but that was fine too. Of course longer term we'll see what gives but I think they stiched me up well and hopefully there aren't any problems.

Bamama

A lot of my story is after the birth so you don't have to read it all. I'm also going to try and mention all the things that I wish I'd known/don't recall reading about.

How it all started : 5am Christmas eve. I woke with back pain so decided to get up. Had some breakfast and struggled on the settee until half 6. It was a constant ache in my lower back. I got up to go back to bed and I thought it was easing. Well after thinking about it a while I realised it hadn't eased.. it was actually coming and going. When I knew for sure, they were lasting about 30-60secs every 5min so woke OH. Stayed in bed until 8 having a bit of a roll around.

OH got up and started cleaning the house. Think it was about 11 when I phoned the birth centre. Told me to bath and take paracetamols, ring back in an hour. Hour and a half later... OH still cleaning and has packed the car. I phoned back to say I was coping and would ring when it hurt more.

Sometime around now was my last proper pee!

Got out of the bath at about half 1? Was drying off and managed to rub my plug into my leg. Great stuff! Rang in and they sent the midwife out. I was 2cm... they like you to get to 4-5 before you go in. So off she went. Well less than an hour later I couldn't handle it. I wasn't getting a break in my contractions suddenly so we got in the car and I was in hospital at 3pm and 3cm dilated >< luckily midwife said I could stay in as the centimetre had gone fast.

Hospital : Midwife was Mary and I loved her! She gave me gas and air and let me lean on the back of the comfy chair. She asked a few questions about if OH was cutting the cord/my health etc. She kept telling me I looked like I knew what I was doing. She had to run me two pools as the first wasn't hot enough. I got in with my bikini top on. It's rather strange getting naked infront of a stranger but it gets surprisingly easy as time goes on. Well anyway I'm in there on my gas and air waiting for my next examination at half 7pm. Mary helped me out and examined me while OH went to see his mother outside. I was 7cm and Mary checked with me who was allowed in. I only wanted OH so she made this very clear to him. Back in the pool I go. Not sure how long I was in there for but Mary put the cd player on with Christmas party tunes. That played twice and most of it was a blur... I heard Mary saying to OH that I'm very in tune with my body, I know I was bouncing and breathing through some of it. Then I had a panic and started telling them I couldn't do it and I was crying. I didn't want to get out of the pool because it hurt even to try. I was adamant I was staying in... unfortunately my contractions slowed down and I was falling asleep. So I gave in and got out.

I ended up on a bed, falling asleep between contractions, with Mary watching over me. OH had gone for a break and thought it was best to leave me get some sleep. Change over of midwives at 10pm and in walks Adele... my original midwife from my old clinic. She stayed in with me while OH popped in and out. I gave in and decided to have pethidine as I wasn't coping, Adel gave me half a dose. One thing I haven't mentioned is that they monitor the baby's and your heart rate every 10 min or so. I had to lie on my back for these and upon rolling back onto my side after one I managed to tell Adele that I thought my waters had gone. She rolled me back over and examined me. This was when my waters exploded over the bed! Adele had once said my belly was so hard that she doubted I had much water. I could tell she was shocked lol. She changed the bed and left me. I thought she'd gone to get OH. Half hour later she comes back. Few minutes later OH comes in and asks what's going on? Inform him that my waters have gone and Adele is examining me. She said there was a little bit of cervix that hasn't gone. No pushing yet. This is not something you say to a girl who has now become convinced her rear end is falling out!

Pushing : I couldn't help but push. Pretty sure from this point on I lost all dignity! I know Adele was changing the sheets under me and the room started to smell rather like a portaloo. OH said he didn't see any poo. So either I'm wrong or he is doing as I asked and not talking about it! Much pain ensued... I had another midwife in, Jill. What a dream she was to have. She rammed my leg up with each constraction and told me what to do. Every push guided by Jill while Adele seemed to be massaging my downstairs. Then I suddenly realised there was no pain in my bum but just this intense sort of pressure. Nothing like pooing a watermelon...! OH had a look, but not too close, and told me he could see the head coming. The girls asked if I wanted to touch. I wish I had but I could feel a contraction coming and I wanted baby out!

Push push push. There's the head. Thank god. I know it's only one more push now. Few deep breaths and... my god - the relief! Not at the fact it's over but your body just gives way and, there is just nothing like it!!! It's a boy, a gorgous boy. I spot Adele cutting his cord and then I'm thinking wait, she's supposed to ask OH if he wants to. Baby wasn't crying and midwives looked a little concerned. They tell me he's ok and take him out to re-sus. Few minutes later and I can hear him. He's letting little cries out. Time of birth 1.25am on Christmas morning.

Afterbirth : I had the jab for the placenta at some point, with my low iron it had been recommended. I was just waiting for Dewi to come back so wasn't paying much attention but I think Adele had her hand on my belly and was occasionally tugging at the cord. I looked down and saw her flop the thing into a tray... OH had a laugh about how disgusting it was.

Aftermath! : They brought Dewi back in and I finally had cuddles (and got poo'd on). He looked so beautiful, if a little wrinkly ^^. Then Jill started explaining to me that he'd had the cord around his neck and they'd had to give him a few breaths to get him started. He would have to be transferred to another hospital (as mine was just a birth centre) where he would be seen to. So everything went a little fast here but he was weighed and had a quick cuddle with daddy. Then whisked off in an ambulance with OH following.
I'll get back to this bit in a sec.

Stitches : OH MY WORD! I was told I needed to be stitched up as I had 3rd degree tears of the labia. Jill was gonna stitch me up as she was the "designer vagina" woman! I had another woman called Sue holding my hand while she numbed the area with injections. I squashed poor Sue and sucked on the gas and air. They made jokes about vajazzles and did I want Jill to give me a pretty pattern? Sue said she was gonna make a joke about prickly holly but said she thought better of it XD I was only numb down one side so had a few stitches into some rather tender flesh... even felt her yank the thread at the end *shudders* not fun but it had to be done. Once Jill was finished Sue stayed and helped me into a nice bath. We had a little chat before she had to totter off to help a new member of staff with the pool

This is the end of the birth part so I don't blame you if you stop reading. I said I'd get back to Dewi's hospital visit so here goes (I won't go into too much detail but if anyone has any questions/is in a similar situation then feel free to PM and ask more).

Dewi : Well I'll start at my local where I still was. They were trying to sort an ambulance which wouldn't be for another 2-3 hours as I wasn't an emergency case. It was now about half 4am, I rang my father to come and sit with me as I was completely on my own. Sue, bless her, sat with me and chatted for a while. When Dad arrived, Jill started telling him all about what was going on. I felt fine but probably looked completely in a daze as I don't think I was letting anything sink in. As she was talking the ambulance arrived, needn't have woken my dad! He came with me in the ambulance though and I chatted away explaining what I could. Had a bit of a laugh with the ambulance boys. They took me to the maternity ward where I was staying, private room with my own shower and toilet, pretty swanky if a little small. Midwife came in and checked my BP. Asked me if I wanted to rest or go and see Dewi, what a stupid question! Back in the wheelchair I go. Pushed down to SCBU where OH and Dewi were. Dad had to wait outside as it was only parents allowed to visit. He was in an incubator but they seemed super positive about him. The grunting had turned out to be nothing! OH and I go back to my room. He leaves about 6am Christmas morning.

First pee since the hospital labour started!

I think I got about 2 hours sleep before they came to check on me and take me down to see him. We managed to breast feed twice. They called me a third time in the early evening but by the time I got there he was fast asleep and nothing would wake him! I agreed to let him have formula (through a nose tube) as it was that or have another drip put in. When I left he was fine. Had even been moved into a cot instead of the incubator.

Here it all went wrong : 9pm Christmas night. OH finally woke and returned to the hospital at 5pm btw! He turned his alarm off and hadn't put his ringtone back on from the hospital so nothing was waking him. Anyway... 9pm we were told that Dewi had had a fit. He was put on meds and put back in the incubator. He continued to fit during the night, every 2 hours or so lasting for 3-9min. We went down by 9am Boxing day to see the consultant. He had another fit while we were there. It wasn't a whole body shaking, just his right arm and right leg, they were sort of waving. Nurses and midwives said they had seen his eyes roll back too, there was no sign of that this time. Consultant gave him different meds and we left for a bit of a break. When we went back down we were told he'd had another fit at 2.30pm but it only lasted 40secs. Luckily that was the last fit he had! We are still at a loss as to what caused them.

The rest of the stay : When he wouldn't wake for a feed Christmas evening they suggested I start expressing. I did and they were all amazed at the amount of milk I was producing (the start of many jokes about being able to feed the entire unit). I kept doing this and they were tube feeding him from Thursday. Friday morning I was in the middle of expressing when the midwife came in to say SCBU had called and could I go down because Dewi was being transferred! Well, off I went as fast I could and sure enough he was being shipped out. They explained that he wasn't ill enough for their SCBU but not ready to go home. There was an ambulance coming, meant for another baby (Dewi was gonna be transferred in the afternoon and they would have told me gently) but that transfer had fallen through as the baby wasn't right to be moved. So I had to rush back up and grab my milk so that the ambulance could take it. Much panic! They were trying to get me admitted to the new hospital but there was no space. Best they could do was tell me I could stay as long as I liked but probably wouldn't be able to sleep there. Great! Never mind... rang everyone and got OH to come and collect me and my things, couldn't go in the ambulance too

We arrived just after him and I spent another few days in hospital. SCBU had family rooms and they had cleaned one out for me Dewi was now back in a cot and could have visitors. The midwives were amazing, I was still expressing so he could be tube fed but they soon got us trying breastfeeding again. We latched at two feeds, the second he even stayed on for 5min the midwife at this feed had suggested nipple shields as my nipples aren't very perky. OH missed the feed as he ran out under orders to go and fetch some! Since then Dewi has been latching perfectly and enjoying his feeds. The midwives told me to stop expressing so he could regulate my milk which we have done.

Should mention we were only staying as they wanted an MRI before discharging him, just to see if there was anything causing the fits. This took until Wednesday... he was over a week old now. We had the results Thursday and as everything was ok (a few blips) so we were discharged.

He still has to take one lot of medication a day, phenobarb, which he has in a syringe. We have an appointment to see the neuro specialist, he has seen us already and told me Dewi seemed fit and healthy. So in just over 6 weeks we are going back to find out what this whole thing was about and hopefully he can come off the meds

THE END

Sorry that this is so long but I think some of it will help others and wanted to share what we've been through.

Few things I haven't mentioned...
Please drink plenty during labour and eat while you can!
Your poo may not be a very normal colour at first (mine was a dark green). Blood loss doesn't always mean a heavy period, mine was watery and turned into barely anything.
For me... When the head starts coming out it felt like that first painful contraction when you know it's definitely labour.

spaghetti_monster

Hi there,
I wanted to get my second birth story written down and thought I'd share it here too. I found it really great to read all the stories - especially before the birth of my first. I was also posting on the pregnancy club then, but somehow only had time for some lurking this time around (in between running around after a toddler!!)

This time I had a (mostly) natural birth after having a c-section the first time.
My first birth story is here in full if you're interested.
But the short version: Had a very long first part where contractions were like period pains, they then broke my waters and it all went crazy! But baby was lying back to back and with his head in an awkward position and by the time I got to 10cm, nothing was progressing any further so it had to be a c-section.

(Also, I'm in Holland - most of the way they do things is the same, but sometimes I realise I don't know the English terminology!)

So now on to the second story!
On the Thurs I definitely lost the mucus plug thing, but didn't feel too excited as that happened with no.1 and it still took days for contractions to start. After last time I was determined to stay calm, rested and at home as long as possible. As I'd had a c-section I'd have to have no.2 in hospital (no problem for me, that was my intention anyway). They also wanted me to call a bit earlier than normal, when contractions were 5-10 mins apart - they really want to keep a good eye on you and what's happening with the scar. But I also wanted to balance this out by not getting too excited, too early (like last time!)

Saturday was my due date and I still didn't feel anything happening. Had a nice day with family and some friends came over in the afternoon. During the visit I started to feel a bit period-y, but nothing dramatic. By the end of the visit the pains were definitely coming in waves, but not so strong. I then cooked dinner for everyone, but thought I probably shouldn't eat too much myself (a wise move as it was curry!). I then thought it would also be nice to have a bath (had been having one every evening anyway as it felt so nice on the bump!), so as that was running I got OH to time the contractions - they were actually coming about 3 mins apart and lasting about 40 secs.

So we thought we'd better call the hospital and they said to come in straight away just to check. OH called a cab and I chucked the last things in the hospital bag. The first thing they wanted to do when we got there was to put me on the machine to check the baby's heartbeat and the contractions. The midwife (who was very nice), went from a slightly wry "you make a very good impression", to "oh, you ARE having contractions!".

After half an hour/ 40 mins on the machine she came back and did an internal check - I was fully expecting to be told I had a centimetre or 2, so we were all pretty surprised when she said I had 5/6 cm and even up to 7cm when a contraction came! As the midwife was leaving the room, I got up from the bed and my waters broke - she could immediately see that they were clear (which was good, as the first time there was meconium).

So now things started to go a bit faster and the contractions were actually becoming a bit painful. But still it was a world apart from the first time around - mainly because I seemed to get a proper break between the contractions where I could fully rest and prepare myself for the next one. I quickly got the urge to push (which also never happened the first time) - but wasn't allowed to go with it at first and had to try and "puff" it away (as they say over here!)
During my first labour, when the epidural didn't work and I was feeling pretty desperate, there was a brilliant nurse who did the most fantastic massage - so I had been nagging OH to brush up on his massage skills (pretty non existent), and he was prepared with oils, massage ball thing, etc. But actually the only thing I wanted at this point was anything cold on my head - and it couldn't be cold enough! Flannels soaked in cold water weren't doing it, so a nurse brought some ice, which felt great. The head end of the bed was soaked by this point - OH said I was really red in the face and sweating like crazy!
Then I was allowed to go with the pushing feeling, which was great. I know I was making some pretty strange primeval sounds and they actually told me to try not to! Or at least to keep my mouth shut whilst doing so to save my throat (which was good advice as I did indeed have a bit of a sore throat afterwards!)

So from now on, things didn't go quite as smoothly, which I guess stands to reason, as the first part of labour (up to 10cm dilated) I had done before, but the pushing part was unknown territory. They had already told me that the baby wasn't lying in the best position - in fact she was in a similar position to her big brother - back to back and with her head in an awkward position and she wasn't really moving down as they'd hoped. Because I was in much better shape this time and had more energy, they got me to try a few different positions. I had been labouring at first really on my left side, almost slightly face down and they got me to try first on my left side, but more on my back (with knees up), then on all fours, then totally on my back. But it seemed that on my left side, knees up, was the best.

Then, at some point the midwife said that as the baby really wasn't moving down, I would have to do it myself with some active pushing. This active pushing part (which I think happened along with all the position changes, I can't quite remember!) seemed to go on forever - actually the birth report says 1hr 39mins, which doesn't include the more natural pushing part, so pretty long I think!
As the time went on, I started to get a bit more desperate, thinking this baby is never going to come out! The midwife and nurses were being really encouraging, saying they could see more with every push, but to me it didn't feel like I was getting anywhere. As I pushed I could feel a little progress, but after the contraction was over, it just seemed the same as before. They asked me at one point if I wanted to see what was going on down there with a mirror during a contraction (I guess this is to encourage you!), and I could indeed see a little bit of the head (with a monitor sticker on it), but not very much, so it actually had a bit of the opposite effect.

Then, unfortunately, I was getting so tired that the contractions were beginning to weaken and space out and sometimes it was almost like I didn't have to go with it and push. I started to feel a bit more desperate and the idea of another c-section was not altogether unappealing! The midwife was still trying to get me to push and push and one more big PUSH and telling me I didn't want a c-section. But I was thinking, well actually I think I bluddy well do!
The doctor had been coming in and out for the last hour or so and I think everybody realised I'd need some help, so it was decided to use the suction cup (ventouse? vacuum pump in Dutch…) to help. During a contraction he gave me a local anesthetic and then made a small cut. He then put the cup on the baby's head, which didn't hurt me at all. On the next push her head came out, which hurt like hell and with one more little push she was out, lying on my chest and looking me straight in the eye!

I had missed this with no.1, as he was instantly whisked off to be checked, but this time it was amazing and I could even really enjoy and appreciate it as they were fiddling around down there stitching me up! I also was able to get her to feed quite well straight away and breastfeeding is still going really well. Her poor head was a bit of a cone shape - this was apparently just as much due to all the pushing as to the suction cup and it was a good sign that she started and continued to drink well (babies born this way can have headaches and not want to suck too much) and over the next few days her head returned to a normal shape.

We stayed in hospital for the next 24hrs (just a formality here for babies born this way - everything was fine). Things were a bit sore down below, but of course nothing like as bad as after the c-section.

And now the adventure has started of looking after two under-twos………

mrs_B_5

Well, having spent a lot of time here during my pregnancy & having learnt a lot in the process, I feel that I'd like to add my pregnancy & birth story as if it can help one person as much as I was helped then I think it's worth adding

We found out in June 2012 we were expecting our first little one having been trying for around 15/16mths & having just been referred for investigations into our fertility, I'd had my initial blood tests & my husband opened the letter for his first testing appointment about half an hour before I rang to tell him he was going to be a Daddy!

We were around 5wks when we found out, so quite early, but something just felt different so I tested earlier than I had previously (I would usually wait until I'd passed the last day of the longest cycle I'd had whilst trying but I couldn't wait ). We had a scare at around 7wks which resulted in an early scan, although I didn't see much because I was too emotional that all was ok! We then got safely to our 12wk scan where we found out little one was due 29th Jan 2013, although Bean didn't want to play ball & pose for a picture so we had to go for a wee to see if that got Bean to play but it didn't so we had to go for a walk & a drink which finally worked & we got a good picture :T I also discovered I had an anterior placenta which meant it would potentially be later before I would be able to feel Bean move & I may not feel movements as clearly. We also made the decision not to have the blood tests for downs syndrome. Our reasoning was that we wouldn't get a yes or no, we'd get a high or low risk then if we were high risk we'd be offered amniocentisis which I didn't think I could go through risking miscarrying a potentially healthy baby & if our one chance of being parents was to be blessed with a child with downs syndrome then so be it

We were still undecided when we went to our 20wk scan whether or not we wanted to find out the sex of Bean but after much deliberation, we decided that we were going to find out but would only tell people who wanted to know on the condition they kept it secret so as not to spoil it for those who didn't want to know, although we did warn people it might slip out at some point To be honest, both myself & my husband felt we were able to bond with Bean much better knowing the sex because it made Bean become an actual person as opposed to an 'it'.

Other than the earlier scare, pregnancy was pretty good to me. I suffered with morning/all-day sickness from around 9wks but was only actually throwing up between 11-17wks, so frustrating when everyone tells you that sickness will ease & you'll start to bloom from 12wks My iron levels dropped in the final trimester, not to a level they would normally treat but because I had quite high iron levels early on & was suffering with palpitations they prescribed iron tablets which helped along with me increasing my iron intake from food. Constipation is a barrel of laughs when you're on iron tablets so might be worth asking for lactulose to start at the same time so you don't get to the point it did where I was really struggling! I also struggled with my pelvis being a bit uncomfortable from around 36wks but I guess that's to be expected when you are so heavily pregnant

With regards to Bean during pregnancy, we had 4 episodes of reduced foetal movement which we went up to the hospital for. The first was checked using a doppler as they were too early to be monitored & the rest we were hooked up to the full monitoring & monitored for around half an hour each time although Bean always started wriggling the minute we were monitored After the third episode we were given a scan to check his movements which was at 30wks & Bean was described as a very active foetus :rotfl:

The weekend before my due date, I had some extremely bad news & found out we had lost my Grandad who I was very close to & who had been more than a little bit excited about Bean's arrival as it was to be his first Great-Grandchild One of the most difficult things was knowing not only would he not get to meet Bean who he was so excited about but I could potentially miss the funeral.

I was due to see my midwife at home on my due date for my first sweep & when she came for my appointment (29th Jan) we had a good chat which was really helpful & decided to press on with the sweep in an attempt to evict Bean in time for the funeral. From what people had said, I was a bit worried about what to expect but it really wasn't that bad She did a good sweep, I was 1-2cm dilated but my cervix was still around 2 cm thick & still anterior so not exactly ready for labour She then booked my induction for the 11th Feb & arranged to come on 1st Feb to do a second sweep, earlier than she should have due to my circumstances & a third sweep on 5th Feb when I should have had my second one! At the second sweep there had been no change from the first & by the third I was pretty fed up to find there was still no change We'd tried all sorts to try & get Bean to arrive (all the usual old wives tales!) up until now but at this point we had the date for the funeral, 8th Feb, so were hoping Bean would stay put until after that point. Bean behaved & stayed put allowing me to make it to the funeral & spook everyone out by being so far overdue :rotfl:

At 21:00 Sunday night, I was at home with my husband when I realised I needed to wax my underarms :doh:So out came the wax pot before I had a shower, then dried & straightened my hair. I mentioned I was having the odd twinge whilst I was in the shower & doing my hair but nothing to worry about. Once I'd finished, about 22:00 I sat on my ball & OH decided to time the twinges & see if there was a pattern as I said they were getting to the point where I didn't think there was much point me getting into bed as I was most comfortable on my ball & would have to keep getting up! At one of our ante-natal tours, the labour ward had said to ring them when we had 3 contractions in 10mins, lasting around a minute each & painful to the point I couldn't talk during them. At 00:30 they were roughly 3-4mins apart & a minute long so OH rang the labour ward & was told not to rush but to bring me in & they'd check us over although it was probably only the early stages of labour :T

We arrived at the hospital at 01:00 & the midwife apologised because it was extremely busy but they were getting a midwife off the post-natal ward to come & check me over. She arrived & hooked me up to a monitor due to the episodes of reduced foetal movement, then brought me paracetamol which I didn't really see the point in tbh! OH said the contractions were going off the top of the monitor printout at this point but Bean was doing well. I remember saying to OH that I didn't think I could take another 12hrs of this only using water with gas & air like I'd intended which quite upset me The midwife then came back, took me off the monitor & then examined me at 01:30 to find out I was 'a good 5cm' & they were going to move me to a labour room :T This really spurred me on as I'd got half way with just a couple of paracetamol!

There is only one birth pool at our hospital which was currently in use but the midwife said the lady was actively pushing & would only be 2-3hrs so they'd clean the room once she'd left & then move us into there from the room we were put in She ran me a bath so I could still use water to help me & got OH a jug so he could pour water over me whilst I used the gas & air. She kept coming in to check on us & top the bath up with warm water to keep it up to temperature. I remember her then saying to OH that she was going to get the delivery pack because I was 'doing something very different now' & the other midwife as there are supposed to be two there when baby is delivered meaning the chair he was sat on had to go as there wasn't room so he ended up kneeling at the side of the bath!

I remember her asking me if I'd felt the pressure change because she thought my waters had broken, I just agreed that I had even though I really didn't care, I just needed to push! She then asked me to roll from my side onto my back so I was in a better position to deliver & the other midwife straddled OH & held my left foot like it was in stirrups whilst my right leg was over the side of the bath, she also had a hand behind my neck encouraging me to sit up a bit & tip my pelvis because they were worried about the head breaking the surface of the water during delivery which would mean the bath would have to be drained. Next thing I remember is a lot of pushing, Bean being put on my chest & both me & OH crying :T He arrived at 04:43, just hours before I was supposed to be getting to the ward to be induced & less than 4hrs after I'd got to the hospital I never swore which suprised me & I never uttered the words 'never again', in fact I said within minutes that I'd do it again!

After 5-10mins or so, they then passed Bean to OH for more skin-skin & got me out of the bath to deliver the placenta which I had the injection to assist with, very strange feeling but not painful at all. The midwife then examined me & found I had a 2nd degree tear internally, apparently most likely caused by Bean coming out with both hands up like a boxer! She got the Dr to come & check the tear which she recommended I have stiched to keep it together, reduce the risk of infection & for cosmetic reasons :rotfl: I had gas & air whilst being examined as well as when I was stitched & the midwife found it highly amusing that I asked to hold her hand

They also found it amusing that when they offered to run me a bath I asked for a shower as I hate baths yet I'd just spent hours in one & given birth in it! They ask you to do a wee in a cardboard bowl which sits in the top of the toilet before having a shower or bath as they need to measure your first wee, it was nowhere near as bad as I expected & barely burnt at all I spent about 40mins in the shower with OH talking to me & keeping watch over me with Bean in his crib keeping the bathroom door open so I didn't get too warm in there.

Once I'd got dressed, I had cuddles with Bean & they brought me some toast. Then they encouraged the first feed as I wanted to breastfeed, he fed for 30mins but noone came to check he was latched on correctly & we later discovered he'd butchered my right nipple :mad: When the midwifery care assistant came to swaddle him & take us to the ward, he the threw up all over the bed & the blanket They then explained he was quite mucousy so might bring a lot up & may not feed much but not to worry too much.

We spent the monday in hospital & because he wasn't feeding we stayed in overnight. OH went home around 23:00 leaving me & Bean so he could get some sleep as he'd been up since 06:00 Sunday morning so around 43hrs. The support during the day wasn't great but the midwives on the night shift were great & even managed to help me get him to feed a couple of times At 04:15 one of the midwives came to see if I wanted them to look after him whilst I got some sleep as the only way he would settle was on my chest being cuddled She then swaddled him, put him in his cot & he apparently stayed there until 7am when OH arrived back on the ward :j I am eternally grateful to that midwife for enabling me to get a few hours sleep!

On tuesday we finally settled on a name for Bean so announced it to family & friends (who were getting quite impatient by this point!) then we just pottered about, saw the midwife & the Dr, Bean fed a few times & we were finally discharged around 15:00.

We've been home with George (middle names of Beau Edward) for 2wks now & he's perfect. Motherhood is amazing & breastfeeding, although it takes some work & was difficult to begin with is going really well. I was extremely relaxed during pregnancy, I didn't let anything worry me & strangely had no fears or worries about labour either which spooked a few people out considering this was my first pregnancy I honestly believe that has a lot to do with why I had such a good pregnancy, such an amazing labour & have such a good baby. It would be my one tip to anyone who is expecting, try not to worry about anything as there's really not a great deal you can do other than look after yourself as best you can.