REMO-Reciprocal Enforcement of Maintenance Order

4m1n4

Hi Mico62

1. I would imagine the arrears number has increased because it would include payments you should have been receiving between the REMO order from the Judge here in the UK and for it eventually being dealt with in the US. For example my REMO order had an arrears amount but it took 6 months to be registered and so they included the further 6 months in the total arrears.
2. Given you don't have a US bank account why don't you ask them to send the cheques directly to REMO. In my case NJ makes the cheques out to REMO in $s and then REMO send me a cheque in pounds. I don't think the exchange rate is the best but it is better than the hassle of trying to sort it out yourself. I don't think they can insist you have a state debit card when I doubt you can use it here in the UK.

Another option is still to open an account with Citibank as you can have $ account too. That way you could receive $ cheques and deposit them without paying any fees. I think HSBC also have $ accounts but they charge for the pleasure....

Caught

Hi everybody, I have an autistic son. QUESTION DISABLED 20YR OLD SON ex defaulting on payment, Can REMO help again.
My ex (not married) is Croatian and didn't want to know about my son at all once he knew there was something up. We did have plans but he went and stayed in Croatia pretty quickly leaving me with the stresses and bringing up my son. Obviously I never thought I could get CSA across the water but found REMO under Human Rights when (still in touch, he really bugged me). I went through REMO very late when he was about nearly 16 (all those years I had lost). It took some time making a case, but the fool who loves music and sang in a group as much as possible made a web site so I traced everything and all the tours he'd done. Had to swear at London Court telling truth. Took about 4 months for translation I think. But suddenly he rang and said - The woman rang me I agree to pay you, I don't want my finances looked into. I had only asked for £100 a month as he was always pleading poverty and also I didn't think the Croatian Court would let me have much more if I asked. So you could say it was done in mutual agreement. However I was getting ad hoc amounts from all different bank accounts over the world. REMO asked me at some point could they close the case. I said no because I didn't trust the way he was paying. Lately I have been accepting a build up of several months last being £500 up to last December. Now nothing, I have been texting him trying to point out how much it takes to look after my disabled son. So he now owes £700. I have rung and rung. Finally he rang back and half heartedly agreed to try to assemble some money together, end of conversation. Later on he phoned to say he would send £400. I said he already owed £700 and if he had been paying regularly he wouldn't get behind. Rules are I believe soon as payment to be made amount in advance. He then got really annoyed and shouted so what will you do if I give you nothing? In the Croatian REMO I do believe he is liable if his son cannot work and has a disability so REMO should continue. Does anyone think this can be enforced because he definitely has money?

anj_S

Hello All

have just read through all of this on here and so not holding out much hope now lol!

My ex lives in the EU and does pay mtnce for our 2 children, but its when he feels like it, ie often a month late varies in amount a little, sometimes somes in separate amts, days apart. Basically to cut a long story short until about 4 years ago he used to pay me £420 a month per child and had done so for quite a few years. He does has an extremely good job, lives in a 900K (euros) house, owns other properties over there that he rents etc etc. Although he is self employed so I am sure he could manage to show his income as considerably less. He also has 2 other children with his current wife.

Anyhow about 4 years ago, he threatened not to return the kids after a visit and I ended up going to court, and getting a full residency order. Since the day I got that order he has cut the mtnce back to £180 a child a month.

Whilst I appreciate completely that this is far more than many of you on here are getting, at least I get something, I still feel its unfair given his income. Its still a struggle to make ends meet, I have had to change my working hours at work so that I can look after the kids ( I used to work nights) so my income is considerably less that it could be as I dont get unsocial hours pay.

My question is this, if I apply through remo, what do I do. Def cant afford a solicitor and I make very slightly too much to get legal aid. The mtnce he pays has always been voluntary. We were married when the kids were born, our divorce was just a straightforward 2 year separation thing, done by me through the courts here. The only order in place is the residency order.

If I got nothing off him I would def apply through remo. However as I do get something I cant afford to run the risk of ending up with nothing.

He does see the children, and like other posters on here I do half of the work, spending a day driving and travelling to take them to meet his mother who then takes them over to him!

EclipsedMind

I can't answer the remo aspect but it sounds like it would inflame the issue and could be risky and cause him to hide income.

Might I enquire as to whether you have actually tried to ask him to increase the maintenace politely. Do you have an ok relationship with his mother and can you speak to her and ask her to pass on a letter perhaps if phone/email contact is not possible. I see so many posts here about using csa/courts when in fact the other options have not even been looked at. Considering he has contact he does care about the kids so I would of thought dialog about their wellbeing should be possible.

EM

anj_S

EclipsedMind wrote: »

I can't answer the remo aspect but it sounds like it would inflame the issue and could be risky and cause him to hide income.

Might I enquire as to whether you have actually tried to ask him to increase the maintenace politely. Do you have an ok relationship with his mother and can you speak to her and ask her to pass on a letter perhaps if phone/email contact is not possible. I see so many posts here about using csa/courts when in fact the other options have not even been looked at. Considering he has contact he does care about the kids so I would of thought dialog about their wellbeing should be possible.

EM

Hi yes believe me I have tried. I have tried to reason with him and I have emailed him examples of what I have to pay out, eg childcare bills, school uniform lists, letters about school trips etc but he isnt listening. i have also said well I will have to try a legal route, and he just laughed saying the CSA couldnt touch him.

His mum and I get on ok in the brief times I see her, but she is adamant she wont get involved in any issues at all.

EclipsedMind

As dialog is not an option then I guess litigation may be you only recourse. I found this guide which may assist you http://www.csa.gov.uk/en/case/remo.asp

I would also think that this thread has a lot of information although it might take a while to go through. There are quite a few people in the process already and it does not appear to be very quick. So you could end up with no money for some time once he hears of teh application.

As to whether you could end up with less I have no idea tbh as remo uses the laws of the country he is in so you would need to look at them. Just as with here there are ways to duck some of the cost it may be possible there is the equivalence there.

EM

PlayingHardball

Hiya AnjS - does your ex have any ties to the UK besides his mother and children, ie; does he still own any property here and does he visit the UK throughout the year? Also, did the CSA have any involvement in the past?

SallyUK

Hello Everyone

I was kindly given the link to this thread by another reader of this forum.

I have been "fighting" to try and get some financial help from my husband ever he abandoned me and our two children back in 2001.

It's been a long tiring battle and I've not had the best of legal help along the way either. He had disappeared off the face of the earth up until last year when he unexpectedly tried to contact my children via a message on Facebook!

You can read the thread here:

https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/2184849

I had a maintenance award issued in Nov 2003 and not a penny has ever been paid. He never got in touch, no phone calls, no letters, nothing. Our marital home was repossessed and sold on and I ended up living in rented property. I have had debt collectors chasing me ever since. I moved to England in 2004 and had to find another lawyer, who, hasn't actually been much help. The CSA didn't get involved at all as he was allegedly working in the Middle East at the time when he disappeared and paid by a company in the USA.

As far as I'm aware now he still lives in Dubai and works in Saudi, and has a new woman and three children (just lately had a new baby girl) - whether or not they have married I'm not quite sure, as he calls her his wife on Facebook. Apparently he's set up an oil consultancy business as well in Dubai and they travel back to his home country (East Africa) ever other month for a holiday!!! His kids are also privately educated!!!

I've raised my 15 year old daughter and my soon to be 19 year old son (Asperger's) who is hoping to go to Uni in September. Any little financial help would be an immense help, but I'm just so tired but at the same time I don't want to let him away with anything, if I can help it. Not when my children could really benefit in the long run.

Any advice would be gratefully received.

Sal
xx

PlayingHardball

Hi Sally, unfortunately neither Saudi or Dubai are REMO countries. It is absolutely disgusting that a father does this to his children and then goes on to have more children. Has he never thought about what his actions have done to his kids?? It goes beyond financial deprivation!

If you have gone through all the possible legal routes you could go via solicitors, I'm not sure if there is anything more to suggest to you. I hope someone can come along with some helpful advice though. Best of luck!

flutterby_lil

How are you getting on Playing hardball?