Non-Soppy Wedding Readings - Help

SmlSave

Hi everyone!

i'd like to have a couple of readings at our cermony but really don't want mushy ones...any ideas?

I also have to convince OH too

nat82

What kind of ceremony are you having? Religious, Civil, etc

SmlSave

Its a civil ceremony nat82 with close friends and family. I'd like something slightly amusing too if possible?

sunshinejoclaire

A Lovely Love Story by Edward Monkton?

http://weddingwords.vox.com/library/post/a-lovely-love-story-edward-monkton.html

Seems to be pretty popular on another wedding forum i go on

mackeroo

Hi Nat
I got married last year and we read through lots of reading til we found one we liked. I do remember a funny one though about still being married when you are both really old, i will dig it out and post it here for you
x

SmlSave

I really like that one sunshine:D

That would be lovely mackeroo if you could

I've found this and wondered what you think:

Yes, I'll marry you, my dear,
And here's the reason why;
So I can push you out of bed
When the baby starts to cry,
And if we hear a knocking
And it's creepy and it's late,
I hand you the torch you see,
And you investigate.
Yes I'll marry you, my dear,
You may not apprehend it,
But when the tumble-drier goes
It's you that has to mend it,
You have to face the neighbour
Should our labrador attack him,
And if a drunkard fondles me
It's you that has to whack him.
Yes, I'll marry you,
You're virile and you're lean,
My house is like a pigsty
You can help to keep it clean.
That sexy little dinner
Which you served by candlelight,
As I do chipolatas,
You can cook it every night!
It's you who has to work the drill
and put up curtain track,
And when I've got PMT it's you who gets the flak,
I do see great advantages,
But none of them for you,
And so before you see the light,
I do, I do, I do!

alex-wakefield

brill!

this really made me giggle.

Horace

SmlSave - my mate had that at her wedding, its a Pam Ayres poem which I think is fab as it sets the rules from the beginning:rotfl:

kelda_shelton

I love it - so much I might steal it!!

MsChazzer

My friend had another Pam Ayres one, something about leaving the toilet seat up? Personally I can't stand Pam Ayres but this friend wanted something non-soppy and amusing and it fitted the bill for her.

Alternatively, have a look at poetry anthologies in your local library, they often have ones on love, weddings or amusing poems and you're sure to find something.

Our celebrant links to a funny one by Hovis Presley on her blog here.

SmlSave

Go ahead and steal it Kelda I really like the tone of the poem, will have a look for the toilet seat one!