MONEY MORAL DILEMMA. Would you give up a £50 train seat for a pregnant woman?

ThinkingOfLinking

:rotfl:

Tiger_greeneyes wrote: »

Bless you, that must have been awful for you. Well done for getting the woman's purse back, she must have been really grateful. Not sure why anyone would leave their purse accessible but hopefully she knows better now. I know it's not something you'd have had time to think about but how did you feel once it had had time to sink in?

I know what you mean about being unable to give up your seat, but as you say, there's plenty of heroes around so it's completely unnecessary. Oddly enough, in all the thousands of hours I spent commuting I can't remember having witnessed even one man put down his broadsheet to offer a pregnant woman a seat, it was always a woman. The majority of men just tended to sit there and push their knees as wide apart as they can possibly get them so they can claim as much room for themselves as they can. It's bizarre how many people say one thing and so easily do another

Ooh, you reminded me of this time when...a guy kept squashing his leg against me and every time I moved as I hate body contact, he spread his legs further apart. So I looked him in the eye, looked "down there" and said loudly, "You're not that big so close your legs". He gave me the half of my seat he was hogging back and left me in peace the rest of the journey.

easy

I havedn't had time to read the whole of this thread, so I hope my posting won't be off topic.

I'm disabled (unsteady on my feet), and used to do a great deal of travelling for my work. I can't remember how many times I struggled, hanging on tight standing up on the tube on my London visits, while perfectly able people sat in the seats, ignoring the signs which said 'please give up this seat if an elderly or disabled person needs it'.

I think the worst tho' was when I caught a flight from Edinburgh back to East Midlands one Friday afternoon.
The airline had overbooked, and as I was the last to board, all the regular seats had been occupied, leaving only a spare folding seat available (the ones normally occupied by the cabin crew).

As I am disabled, the crew couldn't allow me to occupy that seat (I think because it is nearest the Emergency exit), so the chief stewardess made an announcement, asking for someone to swap their seat with me.
All the suited businessmen aboard ignored the request, raising their newspapers higher and coughing, or busily delving in their briefcases.

The only volunteer was a scruffily dressed guy in his early twenties, who not only gave up his seat, but stowed my coat and attache case in the overhead locker for me, smiled and said it was his pleasure when I thanked him.

I hope all those 'respectable' executives, who thought their comfort was more important, later felt just a bit ashamed of themselves.

Rakesh.Chauhan_2

I would allow the pregnant woman to sit in my seat - Only if there were spare seats in 1st class. This is because if the train decoupled, you could sue the train company if you were standing ( which is against health and safety ). If they dont have a seat throughout the entire train, then you have no grounds to sue.

aliasojo

That seems so mercenary to me. 'I'll give you my seat as long as I can sue if I want to....'

I know we're all different but I'm a bit surprised at that tbh.



Edit: I really want a City Dweller / Not City Dweller poll. :rotfl:

skintchick

This thread is why tomorrow, when I need to go into central London, i'm going to burn some carbon and drive in rather than get the train and tube. I have better things to worry about than whether some selfish person will bother to offer me a seat when I can ensure I have one by being in my car for the journey.

Global footprint, schmobal footprint...

drago

This may offend pregnant women everywhere but i definitely would NOT give up my seat. Firstly, pregnancy is a choice, not an illness..it also doesn't make you lose the use of your legs. I would never hesitate to give up my seat for someone who has difficulty standing - whether frail or disabled (or extremely pregnant -clearly struggling with standing)- but after commuting to London for the last 8 months, i've started to get really annoyed with pregnant ladies who think they are special and somehow more worthy for a seat when the rest of us are finding it equally as uncomfortable. My last 'hmph' on the subject is with those ' Baby on Board' badges that pregnant women wear when using the tube/overground in London. Have you seen them? Last week a woman (who didn't physically look pregnant at all) tapped me on the shoulder when on the tube and pointed at her badge...feeling embarrassed and slightly ashamed for not somehow telepathically knowing this information, I jumped up and offered her my seat..only to feel really cross about it for the rest of the journey! I'm not a complete ogre..If a struggling, heavily pregnant lady got on the tube, I am likely to offer her my seat...just don't take advantage people!!!

aliasojo

drago wrote: »

Last week a woman (who didn't physically look pregnant at all) tapped me on the shoulder when on the tube and pointed at her badge...

I haven't seen these badges and I accept that pregnant ladies who don't look pregnant may well have unseen problems that would require them to rest....BUT.....in this instance my cynical side might rear up and make me wonder if she was just taking the proverbial.

I'd find it quite hard to balance my thoughts on this tbh.....my nature is to be nice and I'd find it difficult to sit whilst my conscience was telling me to show consideration but I also hate pushy folk who think they're owed somehow, regardless of whether they actally need help or not, so I also might be tempted to just smile and say 'nice badge'. :rotfl:


Edit: I should add, even if someone didn't look pregnant but they told me they were and were feeling really tired/sick/whatever and would I mind if they could sit in my seat for a while...I'd happily let them. I just have a problem with the 'expectation' angle as in the lady in the post above.

skintchick

drago wrote: »

This may offend pregnant women everywhere but i definitely would NOT give up my seat. Firstly, pregnancy is a choice, not an illness..it also doesn't make you lose the use of your legs. I would never hesitate to give up my seat for someone who has difficulty standing - whether frail or disabled (or extremely pregnant -clearly struggling with standing)- but after commuting to London for the last 8 months, i've started to get really annoyed with pregnant ladies who think they are special and somehow more worthy for a seat when the rest of us are finding it equally as uncomfortable. My last 'hmph' on the subject is with those ' Baby on Board' badges that pregnant women wear when using the tube/overground in London. Have you seen them? Last week a woman (who didn't physically look pregnant at all) tapped me on the shoulder when on the tube and pointed at her badge...feeling embarrassed and slightly ashamed for not somehow telepathically knowing this information, I jumped up and offered her my seat..only to feel really cross about it for the rest of the journey! I'm not a complete ogre..If a struggling, heavily pregnant lady got on the tube, I am likely to offer her my seat...just don't take advantage people!!!

Pregnancy DOES make it much more painful and difficult to stand actually.

Bogof_Babe

Maybe pregnant women should carry one of those fold-up camping stools in their (large) handbags.

Seriously, if they get on a train and find it so packed that there isn't a free seat, they do have the option of getting off again and waiting for the next one. If their journey was so ad hoc that they could not pre-book (thus ensuring a seat), then perhaps they shouldn't be so fussy about catching that particular train.

As regards giving up my seat, it depends a lot on the train and the track. Some Intercity services on newish rails are so smooth you hardly know you are moving, and I'd be willing to stand for a while (not the whole five hours though) on one of those. However local networks are often extremely bumpy and throw passengers around, especially when stopping at local stations every couple of minutes. No-one in their right mind would willingly stand for any longer than absolutely necessary on one of those.

Another problem with standing is what to do with your luggage. I use the train regularly for longer journeys, as well as local ones, so use a rucksack. It is not particularly big (I'm a small woman and can comfortably carry it on my back, even when full), but it never fits on the overhead racks, so it either goes on the floor under my seat, or on my lap if the adjacent seat is occupied so I can't put it there.

On crowded trains it would be tricky to get near the luggage hold sections, and even so I would be doubtful about having it out of my sight, as a rucksack is easier to "lift" than a suitcase. Consequently if I have to stand on a journey, there is the added problem of what to do with it, without wearing it and thus knocking into other standing or seated passengers.

scrambledgeg

Tigsteroonie wrote: »

As a (not yet heavily but still) pregnant woman, I'd like to thank anyone who would give up their seat ... However I would have made sure that I booked a seat for the journey for myself anyway, so hopefully the dilemma will not arise.

Agree - I'm 34 weeks pregnant and would make sure I booked a seat if it was a long journey. Furthermore, I would probably avoid travelling on a BH as it's always busy. Someone said they would give up their seat if it was only for a short time - that's got to be the best reply! :female: