Is this likely?

traveller

Hi,
Following on from the 'calling my exes bluff threads', he Is now claiming to the children that someone from the CSA came to his house??? This makes no sense as I asked them not to collect from him.

Yesterday he gave the kids 240.00 and told them he has hired a solicitor, who has me Investigated for benefit fraud:rolleyes: as I cannot claim 'all those benefits' and get such a large amount 'on the side' from him.

He said himself and his solicitor are fighting the assesment and my fraud all the way.For the record I work 25 hours a week and claim wtc/ctc and help with childcare costs.

I have now had enough, as he hasn't approached me with any figure at all for the children and most of all Is scaring the 12 and 10 year old witless.He hasn't told the 16 year old this nonsense. I feel that I have no chioce but to tell them to collect, as he Is now proving at best to be away with the faries and at worst a spiteful, greedy , vindictive person.

It really makes my blood boil, when you read on here how some men are really going through it to see there kids/being manipulated and here I am asking for what Is for the kids a need and a right and he's playing these hurtful games?

So, Is It likely the CSA would have gone to his home and would a solicitor worth their salt give this nonsense any time of day at all? Thanks

Blob

Kids should not be used in this way by either side it is wrong. In the long run they will see what has happened and make their own mind up as mine did, they now text me information as soon as they think I need to know what there mother is doing and any letters that are left out by their mother, my daughter reads and then tells me about, this is without asking, as their mother and step father are always slaging me off infront of them. For my part I tell them that their mother is good at things as well as their grandmother, who did her best to split us up, in my opinion she is a sad and evil woman, but I dont tell the kids that.

The Kids and the money should never be linked, unfortunatly under the system that is in place at this time it is, and noone will do anything about it. Result Kids suffer, observation, well done thte gov and the CSA!

traveller

I totally agree with you that kids should not be used In this way.I choose to have little to do with him as dealing with him was affecting mwe.If I stop the kids from seeing him and listening to this,I will be viewed as vindictive.All I can hope for Is he will stop this as It's unfair and hurtful.

I don't hold the CSA responsible fot this as he has only had dealings with them because he chose not to be responsible.

SkyWatcher_3

traveller wrote: »

Hi,
Following on from the 'calling my exes bluff threads', he Is now claiming to the children that someone from the CSA came to his house??? This makes no sense as I asked them not to collect from him.

Yesterday he gave the kids 240.00 and told them he has hired a solicitor, who has me Investigated for benefit fraud:rolleyes: as I cannot claim 'all those benefits' and get such a large amount 'on the side' from him.

He said himself and his solicitor are fighting the assesment and my fraud all the way.For the record I work 25 hours a week and claim wtc/ctc and help with childcare costs.

I have now had enough, as he hasn't approached me with any figure at all for the children and most of all Is scaring the 12 and 10 year old witless.He hasn't told the 16 year old this nonsense. I feel that I have no chioce but to tell them to collect, as he Is now proving at best to be away with the faries and at worst a spiteful, greedy , vindictive person.

It really makes my blood boil, when you read on here how some men are really going through it to see there kids/being manipulated and here I am asking for what Is for the kids a need and a right and he's playing these hurtful games?

So, Is It likely the CSA would have gone to his home and would a solicitor worth their salt give this nonsense any time of day at all? Thanks

From the end of last year (October I think) maintenance payments are disregarded in the assessment of Housing and Council Tax Benefits. You will have to check regarding Tax Credits but if you are getting HB and/or CTB you can tell him to "jog on".

traveller

Thanks skywatcher.I don't get Housing benefit, but do get the 25% thing for council tax benefit as i'm the only adult.Mt case worker at the csa said i'm entitled to maintainence and wtc.

It's the visit he claimed he had that's baffling me now:rolleyes:

blimey40

He paid £240.00? Does he pay it regularly?

If yes, then why are you pursuing?.

if no, then I would not take it and let the CSA sort it out, as if you are claiming and taking the money and he can prove it, you might be in trouble,

mitchaa

As i suggested in your last thread, you should forward him to the CSA calculator. A 5 min check from him will get him in a panic.

Solicitors are not stupid, this is the 1st thing they would check, and i would suspect if he did have 1 on board that they would make him aware of this. I would pretty much say that he is 99.9% calling your bluff about solicitor.

Watch though as £240 x 12 is around £3k pa and im not sure if this needs to be declared anywhere as extra income, so if you are not declaring it, you may end up in a little trouble. (Im not sure if you actually do need to declare CM to tax credits?)

I very much doubt he had a personal visit from the CSA either.

You really need to make him aware of this calculator, as there seems to be a lot of tit for tat both ways here. You are both adults, when he drops off the children, you should sit him down for a coffee and have an adult conversation over this and not play these tit for tat games with each other.

Going full out for the full award through the CSA may backfire on you so be careful as £240pm is better than nothing as is the relationship that your children have with their father.

Good luck

traveller

Hi,I asked him back in january to go on the csa website as a guide for what he should pay for 4 children as I didn't want to name an unrealistic figure.This was via text.Because his temprament was affecting my health and upsetting the children-raising of the vioce ect, all correspondance is via text or email.He text back to go to the csa as they will agree he pays too much.

He just plain refuses to up this amount, despite the fact he champoined his sisters cause to go after her ex who paid 200.00 per month for 1 child and has that child part of the week.

It's easier said than done, with regards to sitting down and talking, as he won't listen-although your right.

Loopy_Girl

As you are working you do not need to declare any child maintenance that you receive from your ex partner.

The CSA do make home visits to NRP's for certain reasons. Maybe he's being a git and trying to scare the kids or he's maybe actually telling the truth.
You can phone and ask the CSA if there has been a visit.

Loopy_Girl

Blob wrote: »

, they now text me information as soon as they think I need to know what there mother is doing and any letters that are left out by their mother, my daughter reads and then tells me about,

That sounds like a healthy relationship.:rolleyes: You may not ask for the information but you are clearly not stopping it either and you are forever bleating on here about children not being used as pawns and yet you are allowing your children to get involved in things. It's none of your business what their mother is doing or what corre she is getting and you should be telling them that.

Blob

Strangly I do tell them that it is nothing to do with me what there mother gets up to. They come to me for help and get it as well. However with the current economic climate they now know Dad can't do the things that he has done for them in the past, they see their mother going out and haveing holidays and all the rest of it, and have come to the conclusion on their own that the system is not fair.

In 6 months my daughter will be 18, she is a strong will girl/ young woman, she will do what she wants and if that is to try to undermine her mother because of what she sees as being unfair, so be it. I have done my best to bring her up with an open mind, and legally she is now free to do most things for herself, so what she now chooses to do is basicly down to her. There is a feeling that she will be gone from her mother as soon as she can, but she will not leave her brother, as they are very close.