Stress and money

Silencio_2

Hey, was wondering for some advice...

I am currently stuck in a job I hate (yes, I know people consider me to be lucky to have a job, but I would actually have more money and be financially better off unemployed), I don't know how much longer I can take it...

It's incredibly boring, I work in business sales and talk to a lot of condescending people...

But my main problem is money... I am paid hourly £6.50 and my wages just about cover rent and basic living. I can't afford to save up anything, can't afford to see my family in Wales (I am in London now), can't afford to move house to somewhere cheaper and can't afford to go out and see what few friends are still about...

This is really getting me down, I never know day by day how many hours I'll get or if I'll even have a job. My campaign is ending soon and I may have my hours cut a lot (most people have been cut to 20 hours, too few to claim working tax credits, too many for benefits)...

I think if my finances were better, I would be less stressed. I currently don't have the security to set up a standing order and just knowing I'll be able to afford rent would be amazing.

I have had over 10 interviews, but am struggling to find a job. I am on th DWP waiting list, but am unsure as to whether or not it'll deliver...

This month has been the worse. HSA have 'not received' the receipts for the dental treatment I sent them... So I am £198 down until I can find the time off to visit the dentist.... It has been bank holidays and had to go to hospital, so lost a week's pay there...

Basically have made around £500 this month...

Grrrr

Any advice on what I can do to get me through?

I am starting to get ill with stress... Which affects my performance at work, but I can't take time off as I need good referees for if/when Ifind a new job.

Jokaty82

Can I ask what is your reason for being in London? Can you do your work in Wales, to be closer to your family? I know the salary is probably less, but the cost of living also a lot less, plus if you were nearer your family you might have a better and happier life.

Rustvaar

You don't say how old you are or if you've anyone to support besides yourself.

If you have family back in Wales then my advice would be to ask the family to check locally for work and ask them to hand in CVs to places on your behalf with the intent of returning to Wales for a slightly more relaxed state of affairs.

I used to do a job I hated, while the pay was nice and it allowed me to save a handsome sum every month, it eventually took it's toll on me mentally and I really had to get out before things got worse. Just remember the bigger picture; your health, your happiness, your sanity - they all need to come before the performance of some company. It's very easy for things to get blown out of proportion but if you have the ability to get back home to your family and even find part-time work in Wales I'd say go for it.

I'm working part-time just now and it gives me a lot of free time, which gives me a lot of time to sit and mull over the bad times at work and how things could have turned out better for me, but at least I'm still alive and healthy (and working on becoming happy, again). It's all peaks and troughs, you'll have high points and you'll have low points and just now you're going through a low point. Get back to your family and take some time to relax and calm yourself.

Don't get stressed over work! Remember what Frankie say; RELAX!

Also, try speaking to your manager! Sometimes they're too clueless to realise you're anxious. Mine certainly had no idea!

Silencio_2

Jokaty82 wrote: »

Can I ask what is your reason for being in London? Can you do your work in Wales, to be closer to your family? I know the salary is probably less, but the cost of living also a lot less, plus if you were nearer your family you might have a better and happier life.

Well I come from an area of high unemployment...

In some parts it is over 50%... My home town used to have a lot of manufacturing jobs. That and also, there are personal reasons for not moving back.

I have considered moving back, but I know jobs would be even worse than in London and I would be more unhappy.

You don't say how old you are or if you've anyone to support besides yourself.

25 and no kids.

RaksP_2

I know the feeling! Sometimes I think I should just start selling drugs!!

VfM4meplse

What are you actually enjoying in life? What gets you excited in life? Hold onto that as a starter for ten.

Then asked whether there is anything at all you actually like about your current job. Surely it can't be 100% bad?

Then think about what you would love to do for a living if there were no obstacles.

Then start removing the obstacles.

VfM4meplse

RaksP wrote: »

I know the feeling! Sometimes I think I should just start selling drugs!!

Yes I agree pharmacy is a good career choice.

Silencio_2

VfM4meplse wrote: »

What are you actually enjoying in life? What gets you excited in life? Hold onto that as a starter for ten.

Then asked whether there is anything at all you actually like about your current job. Surely it can't be 100% bad?

Then think about what you would love to do for a living if there were no obstacles.

Then start removing the obstacles.

I don't really enjoy anything in my life at the moment.

I am fed up of my job, I am not popular where I work and don't really have anything in common with anyone. The fact it is so boring stresses me out.

Outside of work I like to see my friends and go places, but all have moved on apart from three, two of which are currently in long term relationships and hardly see now.

I'd like to do an open university course, but even my holiday pay goes on bills... Grrr.

lol, I probably sound really self-pitying and sad... My life really is crap at the moment. Hence was looking for advice.

Yeah, selling drugs would make me some cash. Being on the dole woul have me better off too... I can see why some people choose not to work when they would be better off doing nothing!

muddymouse

Sorry to hear you're so unhappy, I know how soul destroying it can be when you hate your job.

You mention wanting to do an Open University course, but feel you can't afford it. Have you considered a career development loan? You can find some info here:

http://www.direct.gov.uk/en/EducationAndLearning/AdultLearning/FinancialHelpForAdultLearners/CareerDevelopmentLoans/index.htm

You could also consider doing some evening classes, you might be able to get help with the cost of these if you are on a low income. Even if they aren't vocational courses, you might find that having something to engage your mind outside of work makes your job more bearable.

I hope you don't find my other suggestion too personal, but from reading your post, you sound like you could be depressed, and perhaps it would help if you went to see your doctor about this. You might find that if you get help for the depression that your job doesn't seem so bad.

Good luck with whatever you decide to do, I hope you find a solution, no one deserves to be miserable.

candlegirl

Im sure everyone on this forum has been where you are at some point in their life.

So don't feel too bad - it will pass!

You really need to be proactive in changing your life - start with small changes doing what you can when you can - then you will find when you feel more postive things just will not seem as bad.

I have worked as an Accountant for 25years - I once loved it now I truly hate - I have taken on a 2nd job which am loving every minute of it and building up my contacts so eventually I can give up my other job - so at the moment Im working very hard but can see the bigger picture.

Why not try a second job and see how it goes!

Hope it all works out for you!

ScoobyStew

candlegirl wrote: »

Im sure everyone on this forum has been where you are at some point in their life.

So don't feel too bad - it will pass!

You really need to be proactive in changing your life - start with small changes doing what you can when you can - then you will find when you feel more postive things just will not seem as bad.

I have worked as an Accountant for 25years - I once loved it now I truly hate - I have taken on a 2nd job which am loving every minute of it and building up my contacts so eventually I can give up my other job - so at the moment Im working very hard but can see the bigger picture.

Why not try a second job and see how it goes!

Hope it all works out for you!

Its true, being pro active makes all the difference, it may sound like poppycock but its true