Residential Care Nursing Home "vent"

nearlyrich

I was next of kin for an elderly friend of the family, she was in a care home which was horrendous in every respect, she was frightened of the owners and she was on the brink of suicide. I went to social services, her named social worker had never been to see her in 4 years, I went around all the local homes and found a place in a very good one where she lived out the rest of her life in a lovely home with great staff and she was very happy. The "care" home she had been in were only concerned that they got paid a month's notice, the new home halved the fees for the first month and we paid them until SS changed the official payment plan.

Stick up for your relative they should not be worried in their own home...

dannie

Thanks everybody; such a lot of replies and information. Please excuse if I do not respond back to anybody individually as I've still a lot of reading/thinking to do.

errata and nearlyrich- my "fears" took a massive "backseat". 'Not sure if I I've read the home inspection reports.

maggie5 - my viewpoint is that the behaviour tended to cover all three in different degrees.

dannie

Update - Meeting with the care homes owner soon.

I'd be interested to hear more about how others have found such an experience. Thanks.

Errata

It's not a bundle of laughs that's for sure, but it is do-able. Just make sure the manager answers your questions. Sometimes people don't, but like Paxman, just calmly repeat the question until the get the answer to it.
You can take your own notes as the meeting progresses, take your time with these, and make them as full and clear as you need to so they easily refer back to the detailed discussion.
If the owner says something that's not clear to you, it would be quite in order for you to say something along the lines of "So you're saying blah blah blah" which gives them an opportunity to clarify what they're saying.
HTH

elsien

I'm the manager of a care home, and I would much prefer anyone who has a complaint to come to me immediately. If you don't feel able to do so, then take it to my boss, (I work for a charity), CQC or social services, details on the local complaints procedure. I'd be happier about you approaching me first, but if it was a concern about abuse of any sort and you were unsure whether or not I would deal with it seriously, then I can completely understand you taking the complaint elsewhere.
From the point of view of comebacks on your relative, this should not be an issue in a reputable home, but I can see why relatives don't want to rock the boat just in case.
However if I were a less scrupulous manager, if I thought that a resident had someone looking out for them who knew the system and who would have the authorities looking over my shoulder, I'd make damn sure that the concerns were addressed properly. In my opinion, the people more likely to be taken advantage of are those who don't have anyone looking out for them, or who keep quiet for an easy life.
If you're not happy, make it known to whoever you have to to get things sorted, and if you're still concerned it might be time to start looking at alternative homes. (Easier said than done, I know.)

Edit - home inspection reports are available to download for free from the CQC website. However take them with a pinch of salt - there are some dire homes with good reports.

dannie

Another update-Thanks,for the further messages.(Errata,very true and useful comments/ideas from you).

I managed to deal with the situation very well;at least at the time.All has been a terrible stress complicated by "other issues" regarding this relative.Still awaiting to hear the outcome,unsure whether I will in fact.

Errata

Thanks for the update, good to hear it went well. If you did your best, you can rest easy, because that's all any of us can do when faced with a challenging situation.

dannie

Errata - Thanks for your speedy reply - feel reassured and comforted by it (for now!)