Contact Order

hamstercheeks_2

kirstoff wrote: »

Hi can anyone advise please ?
My partner (the father) has a contact order to see his 2 x kids. Lately the mother has been saying the kids do NOT want to visit on his weekend to have them (they are 9yrs & 4yrs) so they have not been coming to see us.

Can I ask, is the mother in breach of court order for this ?
ie in my eyes the kids are too young to make this decision that they do not want to go and the mother should encourage/tell the kids they don't have a choice in the matter ?

Thanks everyone in advance, the local court are just saying to apply to enforce the order but I don't know if the court see it as a breach or not !

Sorry to hear you are going thru this, my OH is going thru this at the moment. Contact was going great but she decided to flout the court's decision

Believe me - there's not a judge in the land that would send the PWC (mother usually) to jail for denying contact

All they will get (if they turn up at court) is a slap on the wrist

nobody questions the PWC

hence successful PAS

Sad, but true fact

good luck we've spent a fortune so far:mad:

SuziQ

Our experience was very like Ambera I'm afraid and various contact orders were not worth the paper they were written on. In the majority of cases a selfish pwc like this who is not looking at the bigger picture-ie what is best for the kids-is likely to be pretty intractable,resourceful and tenacious in their determination to stop contact. It cost us many thousands of pounds and after 2 years we ended up with a 'no contact order' of being able to send birthday and Christmas cards and recieving school reports and 2 photos a year. She doesn't even do that any more,and has moved without providing the new address for the second time running (we managed to track her down the first time.)

Not what you want to hear I'm afraid but the court system in this country really has no teeth to tackle this,plus in our experience the (always male) cafcass officers were always swayed it seems by a few tears,promises to comply and gushing speeches of how she 'really really was acting in the childrens best interests'. The only contact we get now is via the oldest child chatting to my oldest on facebook-I'm sure she would stop even that if she knew about it!

ricardo9874

the exact same thing is currently happening to me.

I was fortunate to have a baby daughter with my new partner in October 2008. Naturally the CSA payment went down by £75 automatically when I informed them plus there were some changes of circumstance. Down from £450 p/m to £254 was quite a hit.

Since this point I have been plagued by phone calls snide remarks even insulting and intimidating letters from her father comparing me to Frank Lampard (who ever he is).

Since January 2009 my children have now said that they don't want to come around anymore - straight after Christmas and the Eldest(10yr) birthday.

then like the harbinger of doom the ol' brown envelope of the CSA fell through the door.

After a lenghty process it actually turned out that I was initially paying too much as mu car allowance and mileage allwoance was taken into the calculation. However I have not wanted that money back , it has , as far as I know gone on the children.

I think it is important to note that you can ask for a second opinion when the calculations are being done as depending on who you speak to you usually get a different perspective.

so - the CSA said that despite me still havinga court order (obtained in Feb of 2006) in place that the calculation actually goes on the nights you actually have the children. I tis strange that even though they take this variable into consideration they dont take into consideration all the permentations.

As a result I now pay £427 a month and still get the intimidation.


I too have looked at PAS and while very interesting, I wonder if the Cafcas officer is going to pay any attention to it.

Watch this space for developments as she has gone against the original court order by not enforcing it and there are letters of intimidation....