abandoned by bridesmaid

xJayJayx

She is being unreasonable not you. It is your wedding and if that is what you want then you should not be expected to change the date of your wedding for one person.
So what if it is provisional it is what you want otherwise you wouldn't of provisionally booked it!
she can't be that good a friend if she isn't willing to go to your wedding so she can spend a weekend shacked up with her boyfriend!
I'm sorry but if that was me and it was one of my friends then i would put my plans on hold for a friend's wedding. More to the point how can she plan a year's anniversary weekend away when she's only been with him 6 months...? laughable...:rotfl:
I say keep the date and make do with the 2 friends that are willing to help and attend, if she is a good friend she'll come to her senses.

rlm_3

Whatever is the outcome, please try not to let this get you too stressed. We had major battles with my parents about the location of our wedding (we chose to have it in a different region from where I'm from) and it was horrible . Things appear to be smoothed over now but it has taken the excitement out of the planning and made H2B considerably less enthusiatic about the whole process.

Good luck. I hope you manage to get it sorted.

Alleycat

Christ, when we got together there was no way we could have afforded to go away for our one year, two year or even three year aniversary. Going out for a meal was special enough!! And what if the first year anniversary was on a week day??

Going to a close friend's wedding would definitely have been top priority and actually a darn good way of celebrating an anniversary as we would have the excuse of staying in a nice hotel for a change!!

Just explain to your friend, that unfortunately the only daate you have been told the place is available for is that day and that as you love the place so much you are going to have to bite the bullet and go for it. You are really sorry that it will clash with your friend's first anniversary but you still hope she will be able to make it...sorry.

If she gets arsey about it, then really is she worth bothering about?

chnelomi

just had to post' i cant believe what i just read has happened to you. it's stressfull enough trying to sort a wedding and keep family and inlaws happy without a FRIEND acting like a child. If your friendship means less to her than a six month relationship then she is not worth it.

if she was in a relationship that was serious and years not months perhaps she could justify asking you to rethink your date. i've been to loads of weddings anniversaries and engagment parties where not so close (not seen since school etc)friends have cancelled or rearanged booked and paid for holidays just to be their for the special day.

mark this one to experience in life, you just can't make every one happy. now organise the rest of your happy day and keep smiling.

kelda_shelton

Re: the 51 week anniversatry versus 1 year.. I mean come on - shes not 15. Adults should act like adults - they could still have a great weekend the following weekend or extend the wedding weekend and make that their dirty weekend!

I think the idea of checking if there could by any underlying issues is a good idea thought but I do think, on face value, she is being unreasonable.

ariba10

As I have said before

"A Funeral is a lot less stressful than a Wedding"

s4aRainyDay

Thanks for all the opinions, yes it is a provisional date but by the time she told me I'd also provisionally booked the church, photographer, dj so it was provisional in that I was still negotiating the cost and haven't paid the deposit yet. I was just a bit stressed last night, one of my other friends has canceled her 1yr wedding anniversary wkend away to come on my hen party, and I started getting upset again! The day we've chosen is one of my OH's friends 30th birthdays, and its 2 days away from my parents 30th wedding anniversary.

We've moved away from where she lives (still with her ex boyfriend) so don't see her as much as we used to, i think she started to change since she's found this new bf. I'll call her tonight and have a chat, check everythings ok.

Thanks
x