How much money do you need to be happy?

bendix

JayScottGreenspan wrote: »

But since you say you'd abolish the NHS, I'm not sure anyone is really going to believe you're that altruistic.

How about if I bought millions of people medical insurance for a year? Would that work?

JayScottGreenspan

Conrad wrote: »

I have zero respect for people like Poshspice who actively seek to ensnare a grossly disproportionate share of the worlds gifts. Does she not think about life on a deeper level that that:rolleyes:

I think it's fairly safe to say that 'posh' spice has as many deep thoughts about life as a brown trout.

mitchaa

JayScottGreenspan wrote: »

When I see a flash car I sometimes think "wonder what hole in their life that's attempting to fill?".

The same could be said about the houses that we buy, the clothes that we wear, the food that we eat and how big our living room TV's are.

It's exactly the same thing.

Why can't you have nice cars without people like yourself being jealous? What holes in any successful businessmans lifes need filling? What about the thousands of overpaid footballers, musicians and pop stars, in fact, anyone famous in the public eye having flashy motors.

Generally when i see a nice porsche or a ferrari drive past me, a touch of jealousy comes along, but then i think, they've done well, who am i too judge.

I would never look down on them, as that to me just shouts out jealousy.

Can't stand posh spice though, she is just truly pointless.

bendix

Whenever I drive past people who look at my car and I see them wondering what hole I have in my life that the car is filling, I can't help but thinking, "I wonder what hole in their life their resentment is attempting to fill."





This is for purely illustrative purposes only. I have no such car. I wish I did. My life is feeling rather empty at the moment.

Pssst

I have plenty of money. I';m not a millionaire but i have enough. Generally it has not made me happy. Happiness comes from within. Its about quality of life,mental stability,a good circle of friends and family.

For money to have an overwhelming influence on me such that it might make me happy,I'd say id have to have at least £1.5m

lostinrates

moggylover wrote: »

Oh Lost! You do remind me of me when younger:o

I take that as a compliment!thank you
I would have to point out that the points at which my perspective changed were

1) when I lost the love of my life, and my soul mate due to the fact that we had both been so obsessed with getting the things we thought we needed for the future that we lost sight of the here and now and he decided that he did not need so much and found (without talking to me first) someone whom he thought would be more easily satisfied with what they had. Turned out she was far greedier than me but wanted him to provide it all but there you are:D .
Thats very sad. I prize my marriage above almost all things (I'd have a hard time if firced to chose between my ethics and DH, but he might win ) perhaps testament to his extreme wonderfulness wioll be come clearer below.;)
2) When I realised that at late 40's I was on the change and beginning to show signs of an inherited genetic problem that will probably mean that I end up in a wheelchair permanently well before 60 and that if I do not "stop and smell the roses" now I shall never get the chance:D .
When ones physical health goes awry, and ones mobility becomes limited then I think one stops worrying so much about a lot of what always seemed so important (especially my OCD tendencies that drove me to be a perfectionist in everthing) evaluate what is good and what is an illness in ones drive mechanism, and take a good look at what the real priorities of survival have to be.

I've already been there. At 23 I had the world in the palm of my hand I had a very successful business, and was considered quite lovely looking and talented in the fields I was working. I had a great life, but worked hard, played hard. Then I met DH and within a few short months..weeks really... DH (then the boyfriend) and my family were told they could 'arrange my affaires'. Despite quite unbelievably certain odds I was helped my fantastic doctors...incidently partly funded by a ''disgustingly rich for show person'' who I know now helps lots of people like me, and they thought if I was lucky I might learn to communivcate again, but not walk or anything. Well, 6 years later I can write ...sort of, thats why I spend time here, its the way I train myself....most people wouldn't pick up on any spoken problem, and although I struggle in my other 'mother tongue', because noone has spoken to me in it' and I have lost most of the third language I spoke well, I since also learned another language. I am totally'mobile' , and although physically depleted most people would just think I was a slow slob. I manage to do pretty much everything Ineed to do, and one day I plan to manage to do everyhing I want to do as well.. I don't think I'll ever be ''me'' again, but I'm going to die trying! I know more than most about the value of love because DH hasd loved me through the physical changes and loss of abilty, held my hand and sat with me as devotedly when he was staying with a dying girl as when he was commiting to a living but severley altered one.

I say none of this for pity, but to explain I do know what the things you describe do to one. The BHS couldn't help me, and it was thanks to the kindness of a rich man I'm alive. It might sound dramtic but its sadly true. It nts true for all of us that we wake out of a mist cleared by our illness and think...whahay, all I need is love! I know I wouldn't be typing now if it were not for the great wealth someone had.

I want money, yes I do. I wouldn't lose someone close to me for it, but I'd do a bit for it. Do I want it to sit in an account and make me feel good? No, although a cushion would be nice. I'd like to live a nice lifestyle, I DO live a reasonable lifestyle compared to many, but what I would use my money for is two fold, neither of which I'll go into, but IMO both good reasons to have lots of money to spend.
Far from being a negative, now that I am coming to terms with all of it it is the most positive thing that has ever happened psychologically and I am finally learning to cast out my black dog, my OCD, and my low self-esteem which caused my drive and to strive instead for the balance that grows from seeing the wood instead of just the trees;)

What you think you need may not be what you need when you get there: it never was for me:o Now that I better know what I actually have, I have a better sense of balance and know that as I cannot have the one thing I really want (my legs back and no pain) I had better blooming well enjoy what I do have:D

You have my sympthy, and indeed my empthy. For me, of course the pace of life has changed, but my beliefs haven't, my wants have altered little, but really, exopanded more than declined. In fact, perhaps they are more strongly held than ever. I always wanted to acheive, I always strive to be the best I can be, I always wanted to earn -sure, to have a nice life- but for me part of that nice life is living in a way I think is moral and 'right' for me, and those around me, and hopefully, a little further out still .

I pretty well never get of my hounding myself with ethics, but I have to say, and this is not directed personally at you, the thing I slightly resent is being told my ethics, my beliefs are less valid, less ethical than another persons*. I want to have lots to do lots with. Further more I want to be able to make CHOICE about my expenditure, not have a high wage that in 90% in tax and 10% about living costs. I want to be able to put the extra I have to causes I believe in, not only on ones funded through taxes: causes/spending that is state approved and signed off but that I disagree with. I'm happy for tax to go to these 'municiple causes', and would never seek to avoid them, but if I thought I could, earn and make a differenc ein a way that mattered and people who are well intentioned but looked one way only tried to stop me, well, that would pretty well destroy my happiness, which is what the question was about

* Edited to add: nor do I expect to impose, other than by way of choice at the ballot box, mine on others. Its my main issue with any high taxation political ethic. Its not that I think that what they might spend the money on isn't valid necessarily, but rather the choice is removed. Where as in a low taxation climate and lower funding, we can choose to, for example, commit 5% of our income to funding public health, or 5% gift to council for the purpose of road repair etc etc.

JayScottGreenspan

mitchaa wrote: »

Why can't you have nice cars without people like yourself being jealous? What holes in any successful businessmans lifes need filling? What about the thousands of overpaid footballers, musicians and pop stars, in fact, anyone famous in the public eye having flashy motors.

It's not jealousy, it's more like pity.

Giving £100 to charity brings me more joy than blowing £200k on a flash motor would.

If people would rather work a LOT of hours and then splurge the cash on a flash motor that's up to them. I'd rather spend more time with my family or retire earlier and forego the flash car.

JayScottGreenspan

bendix wrote: »

Whenever I drive past people who look at my car and I see them wondering what hole I have in my life that the car is filling, I can't help but thinking, "I wonder what hole in their life their resentment is attempting to fill."





This is for purely illustrative purposes only. I have no such car. I wish I did. My life is feeling rather empty at the moment.

The consumer is constantly faced with a series of choices. Each of these choices essentially boils down to exchanging free time for material goods.

What do I think about people in ridiculous cars? To borrow from a famous Indiana Jones scene:
"He chose poorly".

You can pretend this is resentment or jealousy if you want. But it isn't. It's simply rejecting the consumerist orthodoxy and thinking for oneself.
After all, isn't that what MSE is all about?

lostinrates

JayScottGreenspan wrote: »

The consumer is constantly faced with a series of choices. Each of these choices essentially boils down to exchanging free time for material goods.

Or getting paid more the amount of time you will be commited to devoting to work anyway.

silvercar

I always wanted to acheive, I always strive to be the best I can be, I always wanted to earn -sure, to have a nice life- but for me part of that nice life is living in a way I think is moral and 'right' for me, and those around me.

I pretty well never get of my hounding myself with ethics, but I have to say, and this is not directed personally at you, the thing I slightly resent is being told my ethics, my beliefs are less valid, less ethical than another persons. I want to have lots to do lots with. Further more I want to be able to make CHOICE about my expenditure, not have a high wage that in 90% in tax and 10% about living costs. I want to be able to put the extra I have to causes I believe in, not only on ones funded through taxes: causes/spending that is state approved and signed off but that I disagree with. I'm happy for tax to go to these 'municiple causes', and would never seek to avoid them, but if I thought I could, earn and make a differenc ein a way that mattered and people who are well intentioned but looked one way only tried to stop me, well, that would pretty well destroy my happiness, which is what the question was about

:T :T :T

Well said.