buy me happiness

marypoppins_3

I have a mortgage on a house solely in my name.I have a declaration of trust with my ex stating that either one of us can sell the house at any time and after all fee's the profits will be split 50/50.My ex wants to buy me out.We agreed for 70k, then he said he could not afford that so i agreed he could buy me out for 65k, he has now said he wants to buy me out at the agreed figure and me pay off the mortgage (roughly 5k left to pay) and also me pay the mortgage payments in full for the past year since i left him.......i pay the mortgage and he used to pay me half but since we split i have had no contact with him and have carried on paying the mortgage on time each month.
I have a daughter(his) and thats why i'm in this dilemma, i need to do whats right for my daughters future.he does not see his daughter or provide for her financially which is ok by me as i will support her myself.
I could be stubborn and refuse this offer and insist we sell the house but that would mean court costs etc.......the ex gets legal aid as "on a low income" :rotfl: while i have to pay own fee's, he has ignored at least 7 letters b4 this latest offer, all at a cost to me.
This needs to end asap, i cant afford to keep paying the mortgage or more solicitors fees.....shall i just accept this offer and realise my happiness and sanity is more important than money?

clutton_2

""shall i just accept this offer and realise my happiness and sanity is more important than money?""

the sensible answer to this is "yes" -

what he is doing it may not be fair, or right, or proper - but the sooner you leave him behind the better for you and your child.

he will get his come-uppance further down lifes road, whilst you will always know that you acted honourably in all this turmoil

best of luck

poppysarah

So after he buys you out you'd have 5k mortgage left in total?

So you won't have a house then?


I don't understand.
Mortgage in your name but he wants half?

baileysbattlebus

you say you have a declaration of trust and either one of you can sell the house - but surely not without the agreement of the other person.

If you don't want to move a court would probably say you could stay in the house without having to sell until your child has finished education. Then the house would be sold and the proceeds split. There is a child to consider in this not just the two of you.

A declaration should include the following:

The portions of the mortgage each partner will pay.
· Who pays for utilities and other outgoings.
· The provisions for buying each other out.
· An agreed mechanism for valuing the property.
· Provisions for children, such as enabling the child to stay in the property until he or she reaches maturity.


Is the price he is offering you a fair market price or just a figure that he can afford? Don't be pushed into taking a low valuation on the property because he wants you to or to keep the peace.

If you sell to him, will you be able to buy another property? Or will you have to rent?

ukcarper

As someone who has been divorced all I can say is don't get to hung up on the money divorce or seperation is never fair and it's your happiness that counts.

ivavoucher

He's going to come out of this slightly better than you whichever way you jump but at least you get to split the assett and not line the pockets of the legal vultures if you agree to his offer.

You will also have less stress and agrivation.
You sound cool and at ease with yourself, keeping it that way is worth a lot.

Good luck with whatever you decide.

marypoppins_3

Thanks all for your advice.....
Yes, i would be left to pay off the mortgage and also have to find a new home and try get a mortgage etc.....the declaration of trust exists because we have always paid half each into the house as ex didnt want name on mortgage originally.I could be stubborn and not leave the house etc but more hassle for me, ex is slightly crazy and living there would be unbearable! Also since i had my daughter he has invited two of his children from a previous relationship to come and live with him so he could argue he needs a roof over their heads etc!
I think i answered my own question in my first post really, need to end this asap and not get too hung up on money side of things, obviously need to get as much as possible in order to find a home for myself and child but in the "credit crunch" world we are in at the moment i could be cutting my nose off if i keep pushing.