Partner's ex trying to take her money from the house sale

MJ1979

My partner is separating from her husband - divorce process to start in the next few months. After a year on the market the house finally has a buyer. The sale is nearly at completion but the ex has now turned around and said that he is refusing to sign the contract if the proceeds are split 50:50. In a nutshell, he wants the split to be 70:30 in his favour as he says they owe money to members of his family (this is unsubstantiated).

My partner is stuck. On one hand she's desperate for the house sale to go through and doesn't want to lose the buyer (a cash buyer who wants a quick sale) but on the other hand she has both the children and want to be able to make a new start for them all.

Any idea what she can do? I've heard that the monies can be held in trust until an agreement is reached but presumably he'd still have to consent to this and I'm not sure he will. He's banking on her signing up to anything just to be rid of the house. If she agreed to 70:30 would she later be able to reclaim the money during the divorce process itself?

Thanks for any help.

Hectors_House

I think she needs to get a solicitor involved.

Her ex seems to be talking about money owed to family members that she knows nothing about?

So her ex needs to provide proof of that first off.

And if it was me, and my ex had been borrowing money from family and I knew nothing about it I'd want that noting down somehow so I could distance myself from that debt and I certainly wouldn't accept a 70:30 split because of it.

Aspiring

MJ1979 wrote: »

My partner is separating from her husband - divorce process to start in the next few months. After a year on the market the house finally has a buyer. The sale is nearly at completion but the ex has now turned around and said that he is refusing to sign the contract if the proceeds are split 50:50. In a nutshell, he wants the split to be 70:30 in his favour as he says they owe money to members of his family (this is unsubstantiated).

My partner is stuck. On one hand she's desperate for the house sale to go through and doesn't want to lose the buyer (a cash buyer who wants a quick sale) but on the other hand she has both the children and want to be able to make a new start for them all.

Any idea what she can do? I've heard that the monies can be held in trust until an agreement is reached but presumably he'd still have to consent to this and I'm not sure he will. He's banking on her signing up to anything just to be rid of the house. If she agreed to 70:30 would she later be able to reclaim the money during the divorce process itself?

Thanks for any help.

My understanding was that the 2 children also have a "share" of the sale of the house? In which case, his claim of 70:30 is ludicrous.

Legal advice asap methinks.

RAS

Definitely, as a divorce court would probably have handled this very differently.

msb5262

When I got divorced (3 children, OH divorced me for adultery), our assets were split 60/40 at my ex's suggestion - I got the 60. Don't dream of allowing the proposed 30/70 split go ahead; it's deeply unfair. Your partner needs legal advice urgently; hopefully her soon-to-be-ex will be as keen for the house to sell as she is, so he's just calling her bluff. If anything the split should be in her favour - if she has day-to-day responsibility for the children, her earning power is probably less than hers.
Best of luck.

pinkshoes

If she has custody of both children, then perhaps she should point this out to him and suggest SHE gets 70% and him 30%... (then perhaps he'll agree to 50/50!).

She should NOT agree to this.

Who is currently living in the house? What's the mortgage? What's the selling price agreed?

Pssst

This is just a control mechanism being excercised by a man who feels hard done by.

Was he? may i ask if you were having an affair with his wife behind his back?

Either way, marital breakdowns,someone always tries to apply a control mechanism. Its part of the grieving process. If it wasnt squabbles about money,it would be custody of the family parrot. An amicable settlement is better than you both laying out £££ to lawyers.

Debt_Free_Chick

Have they not been the process of agreeing the split of all the matrimonial assets? If so, is there not a Court Order in place for this?

muffintop

The sale should go ahead and the proceeds of sale held in an interest-bearing solicitor's account (perhaps the conveyancing solicitor's account) while your partner and her ex sort out who gets what. This looks like mediation will be necessary at the very least, but possibly court proceedings might be required.

mademoiselle_2

Pssst is right, this is sabotage by a man who wants to be calling the shots and jerking his ex-wife around. My ex tried to do the same, telling me one thing to my face and seeking a 70-30 split behind my back. A solicitor soon put him straight! - but it took me time to find out.

Don't assume that he wants the sale as much as you do - my house was taking ages to sell as well, guess what, my ex was showing prospective buyers around - as soon as I realised what the creep was doing, I took over the viewings and one of the first couples that I showed round, bought! But the price of the house had been dropped three times by then - I lost a packet over it, and I suspect most of the loss was generated by spite on my ex's part.

No-one wants to imagine that someone they have shared their life with will stoop so low, but they DO. It is natural to hold back from going legal on them, 'nice' people don't want to do it - but 'nice' people lose!

My advice would be, ask around friends, Citizens Advice Bureau, anyone you know who works in legal circles, for the solicitor who is most reknowned in your area for being a rottweiler on marital breakdown - and hire them!

DKLS

mademoiselle wrote: »

My advice would be, ask around friends, Citizens Advice Bureau, anyone you know who works in legal circles, for the solicitor who is most reknowned in your area for being a rottweiler on marital breakdown - and hire them!

Top advice from mademoiselle, that echoes my experience, the first solicitor I hired was male, looked like a weasel, and wouldn't say boo to a goose, and after 4 months could only come up with the suggestion of mediation :mad:. I sacked him and hired a pitbull with the most severe PMS, she destroyed my ex in court and a 50/50 split was agreed. She wasnt cheap but very effective.