Have A Really Horrible Job And Feel Trapped

System

whitewing wrote: »

Could you ask work to cut your hours, and then set up for yourself. You'll still get tax credits then.

Your missus needs to support your decision or your life is going to be impossible.

You're 29 so what your parents think is irrelevant (easier said than in reality, perhaps).

1. Do SOA on Debt Free Wannabe and start to review your budget
2. Get your missus on board with a plan for being self-employed (say in 2010). Work out what you need to do. Look into bank accts, etc etc etc. Make a separate thread and set this up as an out-of-work 'hobby'. Work won't seem half as bad if you're planning to get out of it
3. Do a CV anyway as this will help you spot what you're good at and be more realistic about yourself. It will also be readily available if there is any opportunity of part time work anywhere
4. Add some more to the list yourself....

Thank you, You know what, I feel better already:T I really need to sit down and make a detailed plan, I already have the business bank account opened, I opened that last year so the idea has always been there, just never actually done anything about it,

whitewing

Lol, the reason why this forum is so helpful is that we've all done it the hard way!

whitewing

Incidentally, learning to like your existing job will be excellent practise for learning how to handle tough and unexpected situations and people when you're self employed. So, you shouldn't even think about giving it up until you like it! It will be invaluable experience to learn how how to control your attitude and bring about change yourself.

Bogof_Babe

What exactly is wrong with the job? Is it not challenging enough? Perhaps you could ask for more responsibility, or a project you can handle on your own.

nzmegs

MY husband was in similar position to you a few years ago. 2 kids, lots of responsiblities and hating every minute of his job. Difference was that he was on great money. But we sat down and worked out a plan for him to get out of it. Even though he was on good money we didn't have savings but we managed to set my husband up as a kitchen and bathroom fitter (he had very good skills in this area) and we haven't looked back. He now earns less than a 1/2 of his previous wage, but I went to work to help out and we do alright. Not brilliant - but he is happy and that makes life at home better all round.
Now my own story - I am currently working as a receptionist and I don't enjoy it. Badly paid over worked etc. I only work part time and have now started supplementing my hours with freelance writing. I worked out what my real skills are and worked out a way i could use them. At the moment I am able to earn a full time wage working 1/2 my hours in an office and half at home. When I feel stressed at work i think about my afternoon work and how much i love it and how one day I can do it full time. It gets me through.
You need a plan and you need to get your partner on side. She will want you to be happy and if you have a solid plan in your mind she sholud support you. It is a risk but I believe that nothing is gained from being cautious. Good luck.

david69_2

do what i did resign i dont see the point of being unhappy at work. my main problem was my manager as a person he was ok but as a manager he was rubbish

whitewing

I haven't read them all, but some of these may help:

http://zenhabits.net/2007/08/get-off-your-butt-16-ways-to-get-motivated-when-youre-in-a-slump/

advent1122

nirelandguy wrote: »

My missus and my parents are from the school of thought that you get a job, you stick at it no matter if you like it or not you stick with it.

My wife would never tell me to stick with a job I hated.
Life is too short to be miserable and as you spend the majority of your waking life in work why spend that time looking at the clock and wishing your life away.
I took a career change at 40 and I am lucky that I now have a job I love - my job is my way of life and there is no difference between work and home, it is just my life.
I couldn't imagine clocking in to earn £5.65/hour and then working all month only to have nothing left at the end of it except to be miserable for another month.

System

Bogof_Babe wrote: »

What exactly is wrong with the job? Is it not challenging enough? Perhaps you could ask for more responsibility, or a project you can handle on your own.

No its not challenging at all. I don't know if any of you's have ever worked in a factory? I hadn't and it was certainly was an eye opener to me. In any previous jobs i've had the way it worked was when you started you got all the c**p no one else wantd to do, eventually through hard work you progressed on up the ladder, it doesn't work like that in there. People get to where they are at by butt kissing nothing else, Our supervisor got to where he's at by dancing around the manager, the manager got to where he's at by dancing around the director, and even down at the bottom where I'm at there is a hierarchy, its sickening to watch, people's main aim everyday is to kiss up to the supervisor. I'm a shy person, I keep myself to myself, go in do a days work nothing more, hence why I am still doing the same cr*p no one else wants to do 3 years after starting, thats my main issue, Maybe its like that everywhere? But I know in pervious jobs it certainly wasn't, My only saviour is my MP3 player, I listen to it all day everyday, it helps put the day in, I don't know where i'd be without it.

I haven't read them all, but some of these may help:

http://zenhabits.net/2007/08/get-off...re-in-a-slump/

Thanks for that, I really like that type of thing, I have a few self improvement mp3's I listen to and its all based on the same sort of thing, They do pick you up when you are down.

My wife would never tell me to stick with a job I hated.
Life is too short to be miserable and as you spend the majority of your waking life in work why spend that time looking at the clock and wishing your life away.
I took a career change at 40 and I am lucky that I now have a job I love - my job is my way of life and there is no difference between work and home, it is just my life.
I couldn't imagine clocking in to earn £5.65/hour and then working all month only to have nothing left at the end of it except to be miserable for another month.

Yes that is part of the problem, there is nothing left at the end of the week, so there is no real motivation and you wont get a payrise as if you give 1 employee you have to give them all.

Oldernotwiser

david69 wrote: »

do what i did resign i dont see the point of being unhappy at work. my main problem was my manager as a person he was ok but as a manager he was rubbish

Good grief! The man's got a wife and children to support; what an irresponsible attitude!