Leaving the army questions

tartanterra

gibboelli wrote: »

Yeah, I have a bleak picture because of how my other half feels, if he's unhappy it makes me unhappy. Not sure I could really think of any benefits to be honest! I just want my fiancee to be happy and I know he's terribly unhappy at the moment. He's come to a point where he wants to settle down and have roots, not being carted all over the world at a moments notice, I think being in Iraq changed alot of his future career ideas and made him decide he'd had enough of the army and I want to do everything in my power to help him along the way.

I've done over the 22 now, so I will get my pension as soon as I leave. It's been a great life for me and I don't regret any of it,..........however,...................I have seen a lot of utterly miserable people over the years, who only stay because they are terrified of losing the security of being in the Forces. If you're both unhappy, then you are doing the right thing and I wish you both the best of luck. If things ever got really bad, he could always join up again anyway!
All the best for the future.:T

Cat695

I wouldn't change my Army career for the world.....things I've done...things I've seen you would have to pay thousands for..

Not all was good...but life never is....but the good out way the bad 10 fold.

The jobs not for everyone and its best he leaves now than get caught in the pension trap like so many.....but I know he will deep down miss his true friends....guys that would have given their lives for him....not many people can say they have friends like that.

I just hope he can look back and smile with the memorys he will have.

RainbowBrite_3

GPedro wrote: »

Congratulations on having been happily married for as long as you have but, in my experience, a marriage such as yours is the exception rather than the rule.

I'm happy for you that the benefits are worth the sacrifices, but I think that's rare.. especially where there's family or young children involved. I do have a bleak picture of life in the forces, but that's purely based on my own experiences.. I accept that other people's experiences may differ

I do agree with much of what you said, apart from our marriage being an exception to the rule. All of our friends have been married for as long as and longer than us.

My husband is always away on tour and I've never once thought of dragging him home from tour.

Put it this way, we got married, 2 weeks later he was away for 3 months. He was back for 4 weeks, away for 1 months, back for 6 weeks then away for 4 months. It is the nature of the unit he was with at the time - which we are posted to at the moment.

There are people who are downright miserable but they dont seem to do anything about why they are.

Im at the point now where I get itchy feet after 18 months in a posting. I love moving around.

Everyone just paints such a bleak picture of the forces that sometimes it irks me

gibboelli he has obviously thought about it long and hard and he is lucky that he has you to look after him.

Good luck to you both :beer:

gibboelli

Thanks for all the good luck wishes, I know not everyone hates the army as much as my other half does but it's about whats right for him.
Thank you all so much for the advice as well, we've both found it so useful and it's motivated my OH even more to keep nagging his boss to lift his finger.

cgsac

Anyone leaving really should speak with their RCMO and get to speak with the IERO (Individual Education and Resettlement Officer) who is located at the Army Education Centre.

Ask about grants, the SLC pays 175 a year, the soldier may also get an ELC (worth 4000 pounds) also there may be other useful things about war pensions etc if he/she has questions about hearing damage etc.

Spouses/fiancees are able to attend the interview with an IERO (2 pairs of ears remember much more than one).

IEROs are often busy, speak with him/her asap.

Good Luck.
PS don't burn bridges, you may find you want to return one day.

royalirish

Hi i was wondering if anyone could help me?? I have recently left the army after four years. I left at the end of a working month and on payday, however i was curious to know if i will get payed again at the end of the following month because of a lyin month worked etc should i contact glasgow or does anyone have any adive they could offer????

helsee

[QUOTE=GPedro;18480257]I think it's a very individual thing - I certainly don't regret my time in the forces, as it gave me the motivation to make a proper go of it in civvie street. I still believe that the sacrifices far outweigh the benefits until you get a few rungs up the ladder. Unfortunately, I didn't make it very far before realising that it wasn't for me.

Congratulations on having been happily married for as long as you have but, in my experience, a marriage such as yours is the exception rather than the rule.

I'm happy for you that the benefits are worth the sacrifices, but I think that's rare.. especially where there's family or young children involved. I do have a bleak picture of life in the forces, but that's purely based on my own experiences.. I accept that other people's experiences may differ

Oh, and well done to gibboelli's oh for getting a course sorted[/QUOTE]

i tick a lot of those boxes...lower ranks, family of young children....and ive found most of my peers and myself are very happy in army life and very happily married to our soldiers. For me the benefits do massively outweigh the downsides. But i think its a personal thing and if you dont take to army life then you'll probably always struggle to be happy. Some marriages are unhappy of course but i dont think thats an army thing....after all you get broken relationships and unhappy couples in all areas....but just that if theres any cracks, the pressures of army life will just make your situation worse.

It makes me sad that so many people are so quick to paint such a black picture of what it is to live with the forces though. Majority of the time, for many people, its fantastic!

laura89_2

Does anyone have any advice or knowledge about getting out of the army early?

My fiance is in at the moment, his 1yr sign off date is january 2011 but he can't get any paperwork pushed forward on this. What are his chances of getting an early termination and does anyone know how to go about doing it?

Veryskint

Another question re leaving the army, my husband is out in April after 22 years (SSGT). He had a few interviews re the cash, but has been on tour for the last 7months so hasnt had time to sort anything out re a new career. He has only been back a few days so I don't want to nag him about it too much just yet!!

However I am finding it very worrying, ie we don't know what he wants to do, what he is qualified to do (the only thing I have heard of so far is Tescos Store Managers), and the contact name he had just didn't reply to his emails whilst he was away.

Any top tips for things I can look up on his behalf would be much appreciated, so I can busy myself being useful rather than getting on his case.

His skills are BQMS, UAV, tank commander.... not sure how marketable all that is. Oh and I truly believe a desk job would kill him. He is fit enough but not a PTI, he does triathlons etc, and loves fitness.

Many thanks

snowball1972

Veryskint wrote: »

Another question re leaving the army, my husband is out in April after 22 years (SSGT). He had a few interviews re the cash, but has been on tour for the last 7months so hasnt had time to sort anything out re a new career. He has only been back a few days so I don't want to nag him about it too much just yet!!

However I am finding it very worrying, ie we don't know what he wants to do, what he is qualified to do (the only thing I have heard of so far is Tescos Store Managers), and the contact name he had just didn't reply to his emails whilst he was away.

Any top tips for things I can look up on his behalf would be much appreciated, so I can busy myself being useful rather than getting on his case.

His skills are BQMS, UAV, tank commander.... not sure how marketable all that is. Oh and I truly believe a desk job would kill him. He is fit enough but not a PTI, he does triathlons etc, and loves fitness.

Many thanks

He needs to get himself on a CTW (Careers Transistion Workshop) if not done already as they will help with CV writing, networking tips etc. Have a look at this too - http://www.ctp.org.uk/ctp/serviceleavers