Child Maintenance (CSA) questions (merged)

kelloggs36

shaunc196 wrote:

Please Advise if possible. Now this is going to sound aweful. As above, you see that I am staying in the house, paying mortgage and Secured Loan. Wife knows the situation. I have managed to adjust the bills, so that I am left with £13 per week, which I holding onto to treat the children when I have them.

Now obviously, and this is making me physically ill and sick with worry. Wife has applied for IS, and obviously gave consent to CSA.

When CSA come to assess her, how long are we looking approx, and does the CSA look at my money side of things? Unfortunately it is impossible to tell but as soon as they send you the form, or ring you, that is the day that the maintenance will start to add up. They do not look at any of your circumstances really, only your income and then assess you at having to pay 15%, 20% or 25% of your net income.There is NO money there, I am not hiding anything, just don't have anything and the wife knows this.

Its amicable between us.Unfortunately, this is irrelevant, unless you pay her direct, but she would lose what you pay penny for penny and because at the moment it is a legal requirement to instruct the CSA to collect maintenance on behalf of the PWC she cannot opt out unless she can prove that she or the children are at risk from undue harm or distress and she would have to provide some sort of evidence to back this up. A Decision Maker would consider the evidence and make a decision.

I am absolutely terrified as I know, the CSA are going to want round 40per week, which is £160 per month, and then that leaves me with - figure.

We cannot sell the house, and with all the changes that will happen, I wanted to keep the house, so the kids felt some normality when they stayed, and I would that as often as possible.

Any ideas of how to stop this very sick feeling?

I wish I could help you more. Have you told everything in respect of loans? Is there no chance your ex would work over 16 hours per week? I know it sounds easy, but I don't know her circumstances. If she could work over 16 hours per week then you can come to your own arrangements as she is not tied to Income Support and the regulations that go with it.

kelloggs36

tevangelynne wrote:

would not hold your breath my ex owes thousands they have never got a penny off him

How far have you got in terms of enforcement?

Karen1980

No i havent rang them to ask, the appication only went in , in december so its not been that long, Just wondered really after seeing this thread.

Scarlett1

Karen1980 wrote:

No i havent rang them to ask, the appication only went in , in december so its not been that long, Just wondered really after seeing this thread.

I have been waiting since last may for my £5 per week so just a little indication of how long it may take

shaunc196

kelloggs36 wrote:

she cannot opt out unless she can prove that she or the children are at risk from undue harm or distress and she would have to provide some sort of evidence to back this up

How about that she said, it would send me emotionally unstable ( as it had already, and they haven't contacted me yet, but I am trying to plan for the future ) what they are taking away from me, is actually planned to be used for the children. I am taking on the secure loan ( they we both signed, and was used FOR THE BENEFIT OF THE FAMILY WHILE WE WAS STILL TOGETHER ) and that I continue to pay her mum OUR loan, and that I have cleared her CTAX debts and Gas debts.

I am bending over backwards to help her, and now I am being shafted. I could not run and hide from CSA, even if I wanted to, she knows my NA Number, she knows my account number, sortcode and I work with her mum.

I do have a plan, its going to take some negoiation, but, maybe it might work. If it doesn't, then might as well crawl under the nearest rock and hide, as if the CSA are involved, I have no life for kids. OK I will be there, but never ever be able to do anything with them.

Yes they are going to stay over, I would like 2-3nights per week, and every other weekend, but lets see how this pans out. I never EVER wanted to seperate, she wants this for her, nothing else, so she is breaking the marriage up, and I am left to suffer. FUBAR, system is FUBAR

kelloggs36

Unfortunately, there is no place in the legislation to allow the NRP to claim undue harm or distress due to payments. Otherwise no !!!!!! would pay at all!!!

Be aware that whatever your 'plan' unless it is totally legit, you may risk more than you can afford to lose. I do sympathise, I know it doesn't seem like it, but I can only advise on what the situation is - I can't change it, as much as I might want to!

Is there really no chance of a reconcilliation? I know you would want to by the sounds of things, but is there really no hope? Marriage guidance or Relate or something? I wish I could help more, I really do.

The only other way is for her to claim that you pose a risk to her and the children, but this could backfire in a big way, so I wouldn't recommend you do it at all. In the future, it could bite you big style and I wouldn't want you to ever risk any relationship with your children. Do you have any other ways of rebudgeting?

kelloggs36

I shall check out the council tax debt and gas debts bit but it would only be temporary whilst you were still paying them if it can be allowed. Credit cards never are allowed, so don't pay using them.

kelloggs36

Were the council tax debts and gas debts unpaid debts from when you were both living there? Are you legally liable for them or did you pay them because you felt that you should, to help her out?

Karen1980

Scarlett1 wrote:

I have been waiting since last may for my £5 per week so just a little indication of how long it may take

LOL thanks, :rotfl: the kids will be adults by the time I get a penny lol their only 4-6 now lol :rolleyes:

shaunc196

kelloggs36 wrote:

did you pay them because you felt that you should, to help her out?

Thats why.We had great talk today, really nice it was, and its all sorted. Funny, we both want the same things out of this seperation, and she knows, and said, how can I take what you haven't got, and then the kids suffer when they come to you.

Although seperation is never a good thing, a friendly seperation is miles easier than a Solicitor / Messy One.

I must stress that, its not that I don't want to pay, damn my children will NEVER go without like I did when I was younger. Its just taking on the debts ( there is no way in the world she could afford them ) that should give her relief and peice for mind. But by doing this, the only monies I have left per month, are for my children when I have them ( cheap Maccy d's or Childrens Indoor play area for the day ). When my situation improves, and it will, then I can really give her what she deserves for my children. She knows this, and understands this.