Divorce and Seperation

wazza

I am a father of three very young children who live in a house which i bought before i got married therefore the mortgage is in my name. Have been married for 11 years when one day she simply walked out leaving me and the children. We have been seperate for nearly two years. Both of us agreed to get a divorce and have a new start in life. we have agreed that i will keep the house and the children and she has access to see the children any time she wishes. dont want any maintenance from her because she earns 'peanuts' working part time.

I am on income support while she is working part time in a supermarket.

would like any info for the following questions

1. how long do we have to be seperated before granted a divorce

2. if going through solicitors do i have to pay solicitors fees or can i get legal aid while on income support. also would she has to pay because she is working?

3. does it matter who applies for divorce? is it to my advantage if she was to apply for divorce?

4. how long does it take for the divorce to go through.

5. did a search and found that one can bypass solicitors and get forms from the court itself. is that the best way to go? someone said u can get a divorce pack from whsmiths

any advice will be greatly appreciated


thanks

dwsjarcmcd

Wassa,
Not an expert but having gone through a divorce and help my partner with her divorce, I think the answers are
1. If it is not contested, then 2 years.
2. If you have agreed terms, then only 1 would need a solicitor, the other just 'signs'. Suspect if your on income support you would get legal aid (but check!)
3. Don't think it makes any difference.
4. There are statutory priod that need to be waited between nisi and absolute, but if everyone signs things, then about 3 months.
5. There is a string on this at the momoent which make interesting reading but the answer is yes.

Good luck

wazza

dwsjarcmcd wrote:

Wassa,
............
5. There is a string on this at the momoent which make interesting reading but the answer is yes.

Good luck

could you guide me to that link. just want to make sure if its the same string i found

Rikki

If everything is amicable between you I believe you can get a form from the courts and arrange your own divorce without involving solicitors. An ex friend of mine did this. Its worth phoning the courts and asking.

Becles

wazza wrote:

1. how long do we have to be seperated before granted a divorce

If there is no blame on either side, you have to have lived apart for 2 years. If there is blame on one side such as adultery or unreasonable behaviour, you don't have to wait the 2 years.

2. if going through solicitors do i have to pay solicitors fees or can i get legal aid while on income support. also would she has to pay because she is working?

If you went through solicitors, you might get legal aid. You would have to check that out for both your income and her income. In your case they would count up all the benefits you have coming in as your total income.

If it's amicable, you can DIY with no solicitors which will save both of you some money.

3. does it matter who applies for divorce? is it to my advantage if she was to apply for divorce?

There's no advantages at all. One has to apply to divorce the other one though.

4. how long does it take for the divorce to go through.

If there are no complications and nothing is contested by either party, it can be a matter of months. I think mine took about 5 months.

5. did a search and found that one can bypass solicitors and get forms from the court itself. is that the best way to go? someone said u can get a divorce pack from whsmiths

That is the cheapest way. The WH Smiths and online packs include just the court forms and some general advice on filling them in. In true MSE style, you might as well contact the court yourself and get it all for free! You need to contact the Family section.

It is better if you can keep the access arrangements flexible, rather than "X must have the children every Sunday between 1pm-7pm". Some of my sons friends have been disappointed when they couldn't go to friends parties and things as their absent parent must see them at that time and it couldn't be altered

It does sound daunting doing it all yourself, but it is quite simple to do. I found this site really helpful: www.divorce.co.uk

Also consider getting a Financial Consent (or Clean Break) Order. It means neither can ever claim on the others finances again. It protects you in case you have an inheritance or lottery win, as she'll not be allowed to claim a stake. Even after divorce, you can make a claim on the other partners finances if you don't have this Order. Again the court will give you the forms for free.

8pnoodles

You can download the court forms for free off the internet. I think if you get stuck, you can ask the CAB how to fill them in.

http://www.hmcourts-service.gov.uk/HMCSCourtFinder/GetForms.do;jsessionid=16561697E1C5996AAEC4214619B43F42

gentlepurr

hi wazza,

just beginning the proceedings myself at the mo.

things are amicable between my ex to be and me, so i applied to the court for divorce papers, costs £210 in staffs when you send the papers back, and £30 for the absolute, after the nisi has come through. these are just the admin costs for the court, so even if you bought your own pack from whsmith, you would still have to pay this when you sent them off to the court. the cost varies depending on where you live, so worth checking.

sadly, this is my second divorce, and i would try and avoid using solicitors at all costs, as all they do is antagonise the situation and make the emotional things worse.

anything you wanna ask, i don't mind if you pm me, its always useful to have someone to "chew the cud" with.

xx good luck.

Bossyboots

wazza, as you are on income support you are entitled to legal aid for your divorce. You are automatically passported into the legal help scheme. You need to find a solicitor contracted to do family legal aid work and they will need to see your proof of IS to give you the advice free. You would also be entitled to legal aid to settle any financial matters if your circumstances merit the use of public funds (which most ancillary cases do). Again, you automatically qualify on the means test aspect.

As for the how long, it theory the actual divorce can all be done and dusted in three months. However, I know someone who filed their petition with the Court on the 16th November and it was only sent out to the husband by the Court on the 18th January. That is an inexecusable delay and a complaint has been made to the Court. Ordinarily, you would expect a divorce petition to be turned around by the Court in about five days.

Just as an aside re gentlepurr's post, the fee for filing a petition is now £300 and applying for the decree absolute is £40. (The OP will be exempt from these fees).

Also, the comments about solicitors antagnosing the situation is a sweeping generalisation that is unfair. There are a few who might not do their best to maintain peace in the camp but ultimately issues arise because solicitors advise their clients that the settlement on offer is unfair. The other party then perceives this as the solicitor making waves when all they are doing is protecting their own client, as they are duty bound to do. Also, the intransigence of clients who are told an offer is the best they can get but still try to push for more causes a lot of the heartache and expense in ancillary proceedings.

8pnoodles

We managed to sit down and split things financially without the use of solicitors.

It was hard to do, but I (too) felt if we got solicitors involved then things would get nasty. It felt like a gesture of trust on both our parts for us to sort things out ourselves.

I don't think either of us were particularly happy with the outcome (I suspect my ex thinks I ripped him off a bit, and vice versa!) but we did everything we could for things not to get volatile.

Divorce involves a LOT of fragile emotions, it takes only the slightest thing to set things off down a nasty path.

But then I haven't had any experience of using solicitors.

Would the OP who is entitled to legal aid still have to pay some solicitors fees, or would it become completely free (outside the court costs discussed)?

Bossyboots

8pnoodles wrote:

Would the OP who is entitled to legal aid still have to pay some solicitors fees, or would it become completely free (outside the court costs discussed)?

Thats a good point, I got distracted by the telephone and should have mentioned that.

If legal aid is used to settle the financial side of the divorce then the solicitors fees will have to be repaid from any money recovered or preserved. This would be by a charge on the property if the OP remained living in it. However, at approximately one third of the hourly rate on legal aid as opposed to private rates this is clearly a bargain. The divorce costs will also be covered by this and have to be repaid but as the solicitor will be obtaining a fixed for that work, again it is a comparatively small amount.

It is imperative that whatever way the OP does this, at the end of it there must be a consent order signifying how assets have been divided and preventing them both from making future claims against the other. Be aware though that if the court do not think it is fair to one or other of the parties they will question it and the decisions made will have to be justified before they will approve and seal it.