My SOA - Gulp! Lightbulb moment!!

millionaire_in_training

Hi Stolli. Poor you. Light bulb moment day is horrible. Getting it all out there is scary stuff. But hey it is now done. You have counted what you owe and hopefully it will get no worse than this.

You need to do what we women do all the time and get your a$$ into gear and sort this out. I am also a single parent and this site has taught me how to budget, how to spend ( getting best deals etc) the importance of dealing with problems asap instead of burying my head and the art of self discipline.

One of the things I did with my cc debts was to call the companies and see if they would reduce the % interest I was paying. Halifax put it down to 11% from whatever silly percent it was before that and others also changed theirs. Worth trying as the debt will decrease quicker if you can manage this. Lots of good ideas so far from people and lots for you to sort out. Very best of luck xx

Coffeetime

St0lli wrote: »

Firefox that is a fab idea! I mean about the renegotiation with ex... Hadn't thought of that and it may be something he would go for. Also I've got a contract for my mobile with orange which I'm tied in to until 2010 so they may provide it free... something else for me to investigate! I just hope I haven't got too much in my diary when I get into work tomorrow as I've got lots of money saving ideas to look into.

I've also decided that I really should tell my mum about my situation... I now just have to pick my moment as we live a few miles apart and its something I want to do face to face rather than over the phone.

I also have an orange contract & with that i pay £5 a month extra for unlimited 8 meg BB with a wireless box & free calls through it.

Now ive had it for about three years so the offer maynot still be runnng but worth a check.

I pay £35 a month for the phone & £5 for the BB conection.

St0lli

Millionaire in Training - thanks for your thoughts. It's very scary being in a single parent and in this position. I'm not saying if you've got a partner or if you're single its not frightening but when your child (even if he is 15) is reliant on you it seems so much worse. Really nice to hear from another single parent - although its not nice that you are going through something similiar!

Coffeetime - Thanks for the info, much appreciated. I've got a feeling that I would have to be connected to BT to get the Orange offer though? It may be worth the initial investment though to make the savings in the longer term. Hmmm something else for me to look at! I'm not going to have time to work tomorrow! LOL

justruth

As you pay 109 ten times a year, you should be due 2 months without paying this out soon. So you have a bit of a temproary reprieve.

Where is the other money currently coming from to cover the fact that your outgoings are greater than your income? Is it that you currently rely on using the cards to buy in your home essentials?

I have a dramatic cost cut (well you might think it is but I think you should consider it). Sell the TV. You would not only get however much you could raise for it but also save £12 a month on TV license and £57 a month from scrapping a satalite service you cannot afford! I have lived without owning a TV for the last 3 years and I now find I have more hours in the day. Many programmes are available on the internet (anything pre-recorded does not require a TV license).

Sell every DVD you have watched, even of you only make £1 average, on 50 DVD's it adds up! If you have DVDs you haven't watched, watch them and sell them!

Sell every single item in your home that you do not use.

Grow your own food, you will have time now you scrapped telly, it's good for you and it saves money! (admittedly this takes some time to reap the benefits)

If your mobile handset is a nice posh one, then consdier putting it on ebay and replacing it with a really cheap one which you can get from about £10.

Dont forget to go through cashback sites for things where possible, you can make a few quid back on what you pay out anyway!

The ONLY person in the world you now have to buy a present for is your son, and even then it sounds as though he s aware of your struggle and would be happy to accept something that is not financially draining but well considered. Your mother I am sure would be delighted to do something with you as an alternative for expensive presents. Anyone else can just be told that the crunch is biting a bit so you are cutting back. Give them something homemade if you really feel compelled but as most people are now in the same boat they will probably be relieved to not have to buy you a present in return!

As previous posters have mentioned, the Mortgage does seem rather draining, perhaps you could ask for some quotes and see if you could reduce the amount you have to pay with another lender who would pa the transfer fees?

You could try to do some clever credit card shuffling, but this only really works if you stop using them to fund your day to day living.

I know I am no debt saint but these suggestions may work for you. I worked out that by following some of the suggestions you save about £300 a month without any great hardship, so perhaps with a bit of sacrifice you could get to within your mean?

minnie123

Hi,
Have you thought about renting your whold house out, I would look into this find out if the rent would cover the mortgage and the agents fees and if so go for it. You could then rent a smaller 2 bed flat or a small house for about £500 - £600 monthly - that would be a £400 savings that you could use for your debts.

I agree the car needs to go - you can get a more than satisfactory car nowadays for £2000 and then the extra can be used to reduce your debts.

I myself have done the sell everything in my house I don't use and I still have loads left to get rid of - so far I have made approx £1000 selling stuff on ebay these past 3 months.

I also did the sell my mobile phone and buy a cheapo one. I was due for for a free upgrade so I looked for the one that was selling for the most on ebay picked that and then sold it for £250. I then bought myself one for about £15 on ebay. I do it every year now - sell my upgrade. Even if you don't think you are due yet ring and ask they sometimes let you get one earlier.

My groceries bill is stupid so i'm going to be trying to cut down this year I have been reading some of the other boards on here and they offer great advice.

Good Luck

justruth

Just another little thing, your energy bills appear quite unreasonable, have you considered switching provider? Done through a cashback site you make a little back on the switch as well as saving money on the bills!

goinggoinggone

hiya, just a thought regarding the Halifax loan. Have you double checked the paperwork? They seem to have a habit of adding a big lump sum for payment insurance, even if you haven't ticked the box. I guess if it's a new loan this may not still go on, but worth checking if you haven't already.

Good luck with everything.
GGG

viktory

St0lli wrote: »

Thanks Pinky... its going to a long haul but I'll get there in the end I hope. At this present moment in time I just feel like crying as the extent of debt I'm in finally hits me. The worse thing is, I've only got myself to blame. How could I be so stupid???!!

Don't beat yourself up - it is frighteningly easy to rack up loads of debt. I am sure nearly everyone on here has done it. The main thing is that you have faced up to it and are dealing with it.

Good luck, keep posting and you'll be fine.

RAS

St0lli wrote: »

The £150 school fees is my contribution to my son's school fees as his father pays the majority of it.and I pay £600 per term.

Hi have you thought about the cost of this way of doing things?

You ex is obviously not short of a bob or two if he can find £12K to support his son each year, so he is paying tax and NI on his income, probably at a higher level, then giving you £400. You then pay tax on it.

It may also reduce your eligibility for benefits.

Even if all you do is get your OH to pay the school fee directly you will be better off.

krisskross

St0lli wrote: »

I know I should tell my mum about my debts (I'm an only child) but I know that she will make herself ill with worrying (she's 75) and she has only recently finished chemotherapy for colon cancer.
.

Is there any possibility though that your mother could give some financial assistance?

I was very cross with one of my grown up children who got into a financial mess and didn't tell me until it was almost too late to save the day. I wasn't cross because of the pickle they were in and was glad I was able to help but because they didn't tell me.