Coping after SMP runs out

Triggles

There are a lot of things to consider - remember, work has it's expenses.
- transportation (cost of public transportation)
- work clothing (purchase, repair, replacement - depending on your job)
- meals (even if you just occasionally buy coffee, tea, snacks, or lunch out)
- convenience food (if you often at the end of the day do the convenience stuff as you're too tired to cook - we did this a lot!)

I am a SAHM, while DH works full time. It has been tough financially, but we feel worth it. And we have debts, but we're just slogging our way through them slowly but surely. We feel that our children are only young once, and we don't want to miss that time. These are some of the things we do/have done:
- meal plan
- cut drastically down on convenience food
- very rare takeaways (we can feed the entire family on £7 for fish & chips at our local takeaway so we try to do this once a month or two months - we feel like we're splurging )
- cut way down on alcohol and only buy it on sale - we don't drink that much anyway but it can add up
- no nights out - this really wasn't a conscious effort - but with little ones it's just too expensive - cheaper to relax at home with a good movie or book or game
- buy basics or smart price products whenever possible, watch for sales on nonperishables that we normally buy
- have 2 meals a week that are non-meat (and DH is very "meat & potatoes" so we just had to be creative)
- make every effort to make food go longer and not waste (rubber chicken - roast chicken, chicken soup, sandwiches, chicken pie, curry)
- save Nectar points - we shop at Sains as DH has employee discount there - so we save the points all year and put it towards either our Christmas shop or during a month that we have been hit with an unexpected bill and don't have extra money
- save Boots points - if you are regularly buying some things at Boots (they do have good sales for baby items), be sure to save them - they come in handy
- join Boots parenting club (and any other parenting clubs - like Tescos) - Boots send you coupons for lots of free stuff and money off nappies and points back on a regular basis - well worth the effort
- cloth nappies - they are not the big hassle people think they are - we've done both cloth and disposable (we buy Sains brand which are good or Huggies/Pampers at Boots when they have a good sale) - we did a combination of cloth and disposable for the longest time
- find ways online of making money to help out (ebay, daily clicks, competitions - there's all sorts on this board!)
- put aside as much money as possible to make up the difference in SMP while I was still working
- breastfeed - it's easier than formula (no late night bottle prep) and cheaper
- make your own baby food by pureeing your foods (just with less salt and such) - you wouldn't believe how much those little jars of baby food cost! It really adds up!
- secondhand baby clothing - we bought a few items new, but got the bulk of clothing on ebay or as handmedowns from relatives - kids outgrow before they wear clothing out when they're very young
- don't overspend on toys and such - we buy toys on clearance (we've already bought his birthday present for July in the 50% off Christmas sales and put it aside) and usually buy inexpensive toys (DS has stacking cups that cost £3 that he has been playing with for over a year - absolutely loves them - plays with them all the time) - keep an eye at Poundland they sometimes have lovely children's books - and kids don't need a million presents at birthday or Christmas - a couple little toys and they are perfectly happy
- soooo much of the baby stuff that people and magazines say are "must-haves" are not! be choosy - buy secondhand when you can - if you're not sure about whether or not you'll use something much (for example like baby swing), borrow one to see if baby even likes it - or freecycle for it - better than spending £50-100 on something you won't use

There's loads of other things, but best thing to do is check the Old Style board as well as the Debt Free Wannabe board. Tips about reducing utility costs and all sorts of stuff like that.

There's definite advantages to being at home for me:
- more time with my toddler
- more time with my DH (as we're not juggling work times and childcare pickups/dropoffs)
- more time to plan meals and cook them (so less impulse buying from being too tired after work)
- more time to get household stuff done (hanging out clothing so no need for tumble dryer, washing cloth nappies)
- less stress for both me & DH (the work ratrace was sooo stressful - felt like we were both running constantly - because I am not running around stressed, it's allowed DH to relax a bit too)

In the long run, you'll need to sit down, sort out expenses and how it would alter them, and what tax credits you may benefit from (working tax credit, child tax credit) and see where it balances out. Then see how short you may be, and look at where you can begin to cut expenses reasonably.

liz105

My baby is due end of feb, a few months ago we started saving some money that would cover the equivalent of SMP for the last 11 weeks from when the money stops to when I may go back to work. Managed to get enough in the pot in a few months. Suggest you see if you can do the same. You have enough time. Although we have a mortgage I would say it may have been a bit different for us as we dont have any personal debt so have been able to save pretty easily. so its only a suggestion :-)

flea72

ukjoel wrote: »

We have just had second child and depleted our savings after first one. Have had to switch mortgage to interest only until the kids start school.

Am quite !!!!ed off with govt support as we are taxed to death for working but when income suddenly falls off the cliff as one of you is home with kids you only get £400 a month statutory maternity.

We are both reasonable earners both paying 40% tax with no debts apart from mortgage but things at the moment are a real struggle and I think govt should kick in a lot more money for childcare for years 0-3 if both parents are working.

just a bit of help. if in 40% tax bracket then best way to save money for childcare is by using nursery vouchers via the salary sacrifice scheme

Why have you depleted your savings since having a child. The costs involved in raising a child are minimal (espec during their first year)

please try and avoid going interest only on your mortgage. yes, it may ease things today, but you will have so much extra money to find in the years to come, to cover your lower payings now. if you cant afford it now, the likelihood is you wont be able to then either. Best option. Downsize, move area, etc.

The reason SMP is so low, is it is treated like a benefit, ie, put at a level, where it will only make a difference to those who really need it. Tbh, two parents both earning enough to be 40% tx payers, should be in a positon pre-children to save £400 a month, rather than rely on government handouts of £400 a month, once said children arrive

Tbh, everyone finds it a struggle financially once kids arrive, but personally, id rather be a 40% tax payer and struggling, than min wage and struggling ? Perhaps a visit to the DFW or OS boards, might help you reassesss your finances, and give you some pointers as to cutting back on expenditure

Flea

flea72

davesanae wrote: »

We have taken the decision that we just can't have a baby yet and I would rather take that line than expect other people to pay my rent for me, or part of it.

ah, thats a nice decision to make when you have options, but have you come to that conclusion knowing that you may never be able to afford to have a child?

Me thinks, no. You are still under the assumption that one day you will be in a financial position, where having a child means you can still pay your way. Tbh, that day never comes, there are always 'other' things that can and will take your money, its not until after a child arrives, that you realise money doesnt even come into the equation

Flea

Triggles

ah, thats a nice decision to make when you have options, but have you come to that conclusion knowing that you may never be able to afford to have a child?

Me thinks, no. You are still under the assumption that one day you will be in a financial position, where having a child means you can still pay your way. Tbh, that day never comes, there are always 'other' things that can and will take your money, its not until after a child arrives, that you realise money doesnt even come into the equation

Flea - I completely agree with your thoughts on this. There's rarely a "right time" to have a child, because as soon as the child arrives, the whole dynamic changes - expenses, jobs, childcare arrangements.

YummyMummyBigBummy

You just have to live within your means, I guess, when it comes to raising kids. They don't have to be expensive. Baby number two is on the way and we have just about everything we NEED (not want) for this one before she arrives and it has cost us exactly nothing so far! Correction, we spent 30 pounds on a pushchair (secondhand but in perfect condition). We have been very lucky to have received a lot of second-hand stuff from friends and families, and also been lucky enough to have received a few bits off kind people on Freecycle. Plus a few things we have left over from baby number one six years ago. So baby has everything she NEEDS until she's at least a year old (clothes, nappies, cots, transport etc etc). Combine this with breast feeding and our outgoings for the first year should hopefully be limited to laundry costs for the nappies and the very slight increase in food bills once she's weaned and eating what we eat.

I'll be staying at home so we won't have my part time income to top up husband's wage, but neither will we have the expense of travel to work, clothes for work, childcare costs, refreshments at work (had to pay a pound a week for tea and coffee!!) plus occasional other expenses such as lunches out, birthday present and leaving present contributions and nights out to celebrate the same (we're a sociable bunch where I worked). I doesn't sound like a lot, but by the time you've added it all up it amounts to several thousand pounds a year, including childcare costs. On top of that, number one son would need childcare during school holidays as well if I were at work. And if either child were ill I would have to stay at home and would not be paid for that day (it's unpaid leave where I work).
So my personal point of view is that it is not worth being only a few thousand pounds a year better off (and I mean a few) when I'm missing out on the most precious and important years of new babies life, and money can't buy that time back It also allows me time to cook from scratch, make clothes, line dry laundry, make my own cleaning products, make a few things to sell on-line or for presents, search out the best deals for everything, and a myriad of other ways to either make or save money. And another money-can't-buy benefit is that hubbie is happy cos I'm not so stressed and he doesn't have to do as much housework (which he's rubbish at anyway!).
Once baby is at school then I will look again at going back to work, but until then, we are doomed to being slightly poorer financially, but hopefully happy! It's a scarifice but it IS worth it.

angelavdavis

davesanae wrote: »

We have taken the decision that we just can't have a baby yet and I would rather take that line than expect other people to pay my rent for me, or part of it.

I have always taken this line, now my OH and I have paid off the mortgage and are debt free - we owe nobody nothing and we were keen to raise our kids without any help or risks.

I am now struggling to get pregnant and I have been told its because I should have sought fertility advice sooner and may have left it too late!

In hindsight I would have taken a different line to this.

I agree its honourable to feel you are paying your way - but I would also warn you against pride taking over and you finding out the hard way - as it seems I may have done - that you have left it too late. Yes we have a beautiful family home which is paid for - but stand a good chance of never having family to fill it!

I am starting to think that perhaps the benefits are actually given to us at a time when they are needed to cushion the blow of losing an income - so that women actually get pregnant at the biologically correct time to try! I had never even given this point of view thought until now. Hindsight is a great teacher!

Jazza007

I have been on maternity leave since feb last year... my SMP ran out in November. - Get organise - we saved up the money to cover the last 3 months... we also saved an extra bit of money to top up the SMP every month.
Before i went on mat leave we moved house - doubling our mortgage... and whilst on mat leave we have halved the wages....
my OH earns under 30k but we have managed fine... we also had to repalce the heating system in the summer - this cost nearly 3000 but we had saved some money before to cope with emergencies like this.

If you are organised then you can do it.

Reality_Check_2

When we had our 1st DS, hubby was on £9k a year as his work was sending him to uni 1 day a week. Looking back, I have no idea how we managed it. - But the point is, we did. In saying that, it was 10 years ago & our mortgage cost less than our council tax! And we had no car.
After the birth of our 1st DD going back to work for me wasn't worth it with the amount of childcare required. So, I gave up my job working in the accounts dept for a well known ins co. I then registered to become a childminder. It was the best thing I ever did. Sure, it can be quite challenging looking after other peoples children who may not always behave the way you'd like, but at the same time you get to stay at home with your kids.
I'm now expecting baby #4 & will receive MA as I don't qualify for SMP. We're still managing to go abroad for the October school holidays to Spain. You have to search the internet really well to get what you want at a price you can afford, but we always manage it. You may have to tweak your plans slightly though. ie We're flying from Manchester instead of Glasgow. Price?
2 adults, 3 children & 1 inf £224.90 to Malaga & accommodation at £400. That's a week abroad for 6 of us for under £650.
I do a large amount of our food shop at Lidl as it allows me not to cut back on fruit & veg. Also, their nappies & wipes are very good.
Trust me, you'll manage just fine.
Good luck.

RoxieW

Reality check - we were in a similar situation with our first. He wasnt planned but we were using precautions and (davesanae) accidents actually do happen. We were both at uni and as such entitled to no benefits - it was pre tax credits also. We survived on £8k that year which was a combination of student loans and hubby working during the holidays. I also have no idea how we did it! We lived in a tiny house in a horrible area, shopped basics, had no car or social life but we were happy! I never felt a horrible 'doing without' feeling. Fast forward five years and we have a 40K income, nicer house in a nicer area and another 2 children. We have a car and go out more - the saying, the more you earn the more you spend is so true! My point is, you will be able to cope if you live within your means - unfortunately for some this means getting rid of the car, other luxuries or even downgrading the accommodation. There are lots of ideas on the up your income board for jobs you could do from home also.