Kids and benefits and 1 parent working

cocktail

buckethead wrote: »

well the bank gave me the mortgage blame them i told them my wage! if i cant do the ot it goes on the overdraft...not a huge problem...cant move out of the area thats rediculous and im getting on just fine with this lifestyle just wondered if i could get some money free bees like all the others who come over to this country or whom dont work

please dont blame the bank for lending you money,YOU accepted the mortgage amount.
if u are left with £80 at the end of the month,after a large mortgage(relative to our salary) thats your lifestyle choice.

Coupon-mad

cocktail wrote: »

please dont blame the bank for lending you money,YOU accepted the mortgage amount.
if u are left with £80 at the end of the month,after a large mortgage(relative to our salary) thats your lifestyle choice.

Maybe the Bank granted the mortgage when they were both working, we don't know that do we? So in that case, having the child and becoming a SAHM was the lifestyle choice.

Not that there's anything wrong with becoming a SAHM for such a young child. I have experienced being a full-time working Mum, a part-time working mum and then a (temporarily) SAHM Mum when my 4 kids were smaller and the hardest thing of all was working at all when I had a baby or toddler. It's easier when they get to school but that's a long way off OP.

I would be talking to your wife about the financial strain you are under at the mo, before your hours might get cut and you fall into further debt. It won't be easy for her/you to juggle but maybe a part time job would ease things financially, as long as she gets your help at home with the baby and the house as well. I'm not saying she doesn't BTW, I am saying that a working Mum can't do everything she probably currently manages on her own.

briona

buckethead wrote: »

I earn £1450 a month after tax, I normally top this amount up to £2000 a month with overtime if im lucky, my mortgage is £1250 a month and with other bills I pay out approx £1800 each month.

My wife doesnt work through choice and stays home looking after our 16 month old daughter.

To put it bluntly, your problems are of your own making – a mortgage worth 86% of your normal take home pay, bills that massively exceed your take home pay, leading to an over-reliance on overtime, and a wife who doesn't work – and yet you think the State should support your choices?!

As others have said, in the event there were no overtime, how on earth would you afford to live?!

Can you change your mortgage to interest only, even for a short time? (And if you tell me it IS on IO already, I might just faint!). If you take this option, somewhere along the line you will need to put aside money to clear the capital, but for now, it might free up some much-needed income.

With regards to the remaining £550 you're spending on bills – what does this cover? Electric? Gas? Food? Petrol? Car insurance? – people on here should be able to advise you on whether you can make any cutbacks. If you do an SOA – link below – (Statement of Affairs – basically all your incomings and outgoings, debts and assets), you may have more of an idea of where all your money is going!

http://www.makesenseofcards.com/soacalc.html

Briona

cocktail

Coupon-mad wrote: »

Maybe the Bank granted the mortgage when they were both working, we don't know that do we? So in that case, having the child and becoming a SAHM was the lifestyle choice.

Not that there's anything wrong with becoming a SAHM for such a young child. I have experienced being a full-time working Mum, a part-time working mum and then a (temporarily) SAHM Mum when my 4 kids were smaller and the hardest thing of all was working at all when I had a baby or toddler. It's easier when they get to school but that's a long way off OP.

I would be talking to your wife about the financial strain you are under at the mo, before your hours might get cut and you fall into further debt. It won't be easy for her/you to juggle but maybe a part time job would ease things financially, as long as she gets your help at home with the baby and the house as well. I'm not saying she doesn't BTW, I am saying that a working Mum can't do everything she probably currently manages on her own.

emotions aside,the OP does have a large mortgage in relation to his salary, also there is a reliance on overtime.

Caroline73_2

Benefits are for people who can't work - not for people who chose not to.

If you want more disposable income as a family, then more to somewhere cheaper or your wife could get a job, it's not rocket science.

robin_banks

I earn a similar amount to the OP (as basic), my OH is a SAHM, the big difference is we rent in North London.

You borrowed the money and signed the forms etc, so you can't blame anyone but yourself re the mortgage, and the only way out is if your OH works, it's not desireable but it's an economic reality you may have to face.

FTR I also know how expensive childcare is.

Conor_3

buckethead wrote: »

well the bank gave me the mortgage blame them i told them my wage!

Did they hold a gun to your head? You knew your income and the mortgage payments. Surely something somewhere told you that it wasn't really affordable?

When I took out my mortgage, I made sure that even if I ended up unemployed that it'd still be affordable.

Bogof_Babe

buckethead wrote: »

because unless you want to live in a flat in London theres little alternative

What's wrong with living in a flat?

Marker_2

buckethead wrote: »

well the bank gave me the mortgage blame them i told them my wage! if i cant do the ot it goes on the overdraft...not a huge problem...cant move out of the area thats rediculous and im getting on just fine with this lifestyle just wondered if i could get some money free bees like all the others who come over to this country or whom dont work

I can't believe this was your reply to me. I gave genuine good advice which the least you could of done was 'take on board', rather than dismiss as ridiculous.

Your steep mortgage was your own doing ... if the bank told you to jump off a cliff would you? Probably not so you didnt have to accept a mortgage just less of your income.

You seriously need to re-evaluate your situation:

*Move out of London and commute to work.
*Get a better pad job
*Missus starts working again

parisjordana

Wow I would love your wages...and only three of you,please make sure you dont bring any more children into the equation as that would make matters worse.....I cant have a go at you I simply feel sorry for you.....I wouldnt want a morgage that high hanging over my head.....I would get a cheaper house with less morgage=more disposable income.