Wife wants to buy now, I want to wait 5 years+. Advice?

Oldernotwiser

seven-day-weekend wrote: »

I don't mean this nasty, but I think your wife needs professional help if she is really that envious of her sister and cares so much about having a ten-year-old sofa. Why does she think having a new sofa is going to make her happy?

No way do I think you should buy a house at the moment. You need to get your debt/spending/wife's priorities sorted first.

I hope your wife will come to love her Council house, enjoy the fact that the rent is so low, stop trying to keep up with the Jones's and get it into her head that having the best phone isn't going to make people like your daughter any more than they do already, in fact it's more likely to have the opposite effect.

When you've cleared your debt, saved for a deposit and got your spending under control, then you could THINK about buying a house.

I do agree totally with this. The OP needs to get his wife to come and read here, both on OS to learn how to live well cheaply, but, more importantly, to read on the DFW and Bankruptcy boards. So many people have been in better financial situations and then gone downhill so rapidly.

She does sound a very unhappy woman who perhaps needs more of a challenge in her life and less time worrying about keeping up with her sister.

CocoLoco_3

Glen0000 wrote: »

Debt in mainly in my wifes name, inheritance left to me. I have to say I have contributed towards the CC debt, nights out, expensive toys. We are both to blame really.

If it were me, I'd use my inheritance ( as in, it's mine, so I can do what I like with it ) to pay off the credit card, confiscate your wife's card, chop them both up ( chop up the cards, not chop up your wife! :rotfl: ), cancel it and "ban" your wife from taking out another one.

Conqueror_2

TotallyBroke wrote: »

I agree she could be in a house next year but if she was my wife she'd be in it on her own!
Unless ofcourse she got a job that doubled my salary or she won the lottery.

Ok, speaking from a non-financial aspect, dude is better off buying that dream house his wife is after, lest he would have to leave with the ugly consequences of cohabiting with an angry wife for the rest of his life if She happens to be Right and they're priced out of the market next year .

Obviously, from a financial perspective, I'll say Glenn don't do it just yet as prices are still falling. However, make sure you will still have the necessary deposit when the time comes, or you will take the fall for not buying when you wife wanted to.

Reds-on-Sea

Pay off the £10k debt, cut up your cards, surely you have enough expensive toys by now, use £1000 to buy your wife a new sofa and a wonderbra and then... totally overhaul your budget. If what you say is true and this is the only debt you have, you will be £500 better off each month by clearing it. You say you overspend by £400 a month so this, at the very least is covered.

You earn £35k, you have £350 rent - OMG, you're sooo lucky! you should be able to keep in the black...... make it very clear to your wife that you will NOT bail her out of her debts again. She wants? She saves up!

Conqueror_2

Reds-on-Sea wrote: »

make it very clear to your wife that you will NOT bail her out of her debts again. She wants? She saves up!

Er....I think most married men here will agree with me that this is easier said than done . There is a saying that goes "Ce que femme veut Dieu le veut", which translates into a woman gets what she wants (literally "What a woman wants, God wants"). The psychology of a married man is usually different from one of a bachelor. Once the married man is made to feel like he is not doing enough to please his woman, he will usually bend over backward to do what it takes to please her and prove everyone else wrong. So, my bet is on Glen sitting cozily in the new house next year after all is said and done .

Glen0000

Conqueror wrote: »

Er....I think most married men here will agree with me that this is easier said than done . There is a saying that goes "Ce que femme veut Dieu le veut", which translates into a woman gets what she wants (literally "What a woman wants, God wants"). The psychology of a married man is usually different from one of a bachelor. Once the married man is made to feel like he is not doing enough to please his woman, he will usually bend over backward to do what it takes to please her and prove everyone else wrong. So, my bet is on Glen sitting cozily in the new house next year after all is said and done .

You feel my pain my friend. IF my wife is right and house prices start spiralling out of control in 3 years or so and we are priced out yet again, I will be in the doghouse for sure. There is not even the evidence of a crash where we live, prices are very slowly coming down, but not much. As for the credit crunch, I have just been to Asda and the place was heaving. If people have less money to spend they are cetianly not showing it.

Glen0000

CocoLoco wrote: »

If it were me, I'd use my inheritance ( as in, it's mine, so I can do what I like with it ) to pay off the credit card, confiscate your wife's card, chop them both up ( chop up the cards, not chop up your wife! :rotfl: ), cancel it and "ban" your wife from taking out another one.

You are obviously not married :rotfl:

seven-day-weekend

Well my husband and I make joint decisions. I certainly don't expect him to do something just because I say so (or vice versa). If we don't agree on something we discuss it like adults until we come to an agreement. We've been married over 37 years.

I'm afraid I'm a little annoyed at the stereotyping here.

itzmee

Glenn, I have just reread this thread. You say you want to get off a council estate. Where I live £100k will only buy you an ex-council house so you may find that you are no better off than you are now except you will be paying much more for the privilege and your neighbour could still be a council tenant!! :mad:

We bought an ex-council house as it was so much bigger than the 2-bed HA house we were in with 2 children. The house itself is nice and we have made it much nicer, but once you step outside onto the street you are still on a council estate with scumbags who don't give a sh*t about their area and have no respect for anything. The majority of the estate is now privately owned and the council have done up all the remaining council houses, but there are still a few scumbag chavs here who ruin it for the rest of us. Last year we considered selling up and renting a nice house privately for the same amount as we would spend on a mortgage but we decided instead to make the most of where we are and make it a show house inside because we're stuck here, we will be in negative equity within a year or two. Our salary covers the mortgage, bills and a few extras and we don't struggle because we haven't overstretched ourselves. Like I said, I wish we had stayed put in our HA house but hindsight is wonderful.

CocoLoco_3

Glen0000 wrote: »

You are obviously not married :rotfl:

Funnily enough, you're right! But I'm female!!!!