at last

jumping_j11

I would be interested to know, Murphy, what helped you to get out of denial? I ask because I am sure my son is going into a downward debt spiral and is just burying his head in the sand, although very stressed about it. He hates talking or thinking about money. I would like to help him but I don't want to be interfering and I am afraid that if I just lent him money at the moment he probably wouldn't use it wisely and that would just cause bad feeling between us and not help his situation.(Whenever he has borrowed money from me before he has always paid back promptly, though I suspect by borrowing from other sources).
What sort of help would you have really valued from a relative/friend, and at what stage?

murphy2

A relative helped to force the issue , I was the very same , flying off the handle any time money was mentioned ,changing the subject avoiding people and situations that i knew would lead the dreaded money topic, Its a complex issuse but now that i have taken action with help its a million times better!! Its all to easy to believe in your own ability to fix a situation which has such a deep hold ( it becomes a way of life that you cant see how wrong and damaging it really is ) but the sooner you get help and acknowledge the situation the better ( ops sorry i am off on one got a cheek !) it may be difficult but i am so greatful to the people who have helped me so far , so get stuck in !!!!!!!!!!!!!

workingatit

well done! :j

I was where you are a year ago now, and the past year has been so much happier, once everything settles down and you fall into the regular payments with cccs and creditors phonecalls stops you will feel so much better!

good luck for the future, and keep your chin up, you will get there!

W :-)

severussnape

we know exactly where you are at the moment cos we are there too. it takes ages for you to eventually wake up to the situation don't you think?
We cannot believe what we are reading about Mbna but understand that capital one are about the same.

good luck it will all get better now

murphy2

Waiting for DMP to start , on track for 25th feb all going well , But what is the deal with token payments to creditors , I have offered and mostly been taken up on offers no probs. Mbna have refused token payments and ignored requests for a hold action on my account, Therefore still applying charges making the situation worse. Any ideas ???