Young, stupid person in need of help!!!

halight

Hi and welcome,

You are in a great place to get all the help and advice that you need. so try to stop worringing so much...

You will get throuth this you might not think so now but you will!!!!

Ask anything you wont. and if you need a good shout then come on here and do that too!


All the vety best to you and your OH

sillylittlejill

Well its just that, this week my boyfriend has been paid (today!) but we have no money because all the bills come out this week and then I start my xmas temp job next monday and I have a basic wage then commission on top of that so I can't fill the SOA in properly. I'm just so frustrated with the situation. I'm only 19, my OH has just turned 20, we should be happy and in love and everything and instead we are both sitting on the sofa getting upset and not having anyone to turn to. At least we know our relationship is strong!! I'll do one tonight though, on my basic wage and post it. THe plan is to put anything I earn in commission onto my credit card and anything he earns as bonus at work on his.

I desperately want to go back to college in January but not sure whether to. In the long run itll be much better, but not sure whether to do it because of how bad things are now.

anyone else had this problem?

xxx

Verbatim

Believe everyone, as soon as you feel you've taken control and understand what you need to do and have a plan the world will seem a lot less threatening and you'll be less stressed.

Look forward to seeing how you get on.

xxV

partickz

sillylittlejill wrote: »

I desperately want to go back to college in January but not sure whether to. In the long run itll be much better, but not sure whether to do it because of how bad things are now.

xxx

If I was you I would wait until summer before going to college. Try and clear your debts first and get into the habit of budgeting. You will find a better choice of courses on offer with August/September starts anyway.

You will also find it easier to focus on coursework if your finances are in good order. :j

looktothefuture

sillylittlejill wrote: »

anyone else had this problem?

:rotfl: You must be joking right??

I moved out, against my mothers advice, 4 years ago at the age of 26... I did ok for about 3 months and bang... I lost my job! And golly have we struggled since - 4 years down the line, I'm knocking 30 and I own nothing with barely a penny to my name but gosh I'm proud of being where I am now as opposed to where I've just left! My partner pays diddly squat compared to what I do toward the household because he's paying maintenance for his 2 children to his ex's (bitter and twised, hell yeah! ) and it leaves him with barely anything to live on the rest of the month...

Sweet, I've been where you are - we all have! Use this board as your own podium and scream, shout, cry and laugh but most of all learn to do things better than before!

Here's another dodgy hug! :grouphug:

sillylittlejill

aw thanks Just feel like I'm still a kid, why was I allowed a credit card?!?! I didnt think about what I was getting myself into. There should be an age thing on credit cards of 21 I reckon. Its my fault really for leaving my old job but id been bullied for a year and a half by my boss and I snapped, not thinking and I felt so free, then everything caught up with me and I feel guilty for making this so much worse than it already was. I'm only 19 and my life feels way too complicated!!! I miss being able to buy something because I wanted it instead of because I need it!

xxx

LilDevil

sillylittlejill wrote: »

aw thanks Just feel like I'm still a kid, why was I allowed a credit card?!?! I didnt think about what I was getting myself into. There should be an age thing on credit cards of 21 I reckon. Its my fault really for leaving my old job but id been bullied for a year and a half by my boss and I snapped, not thinking and I felt so free, then everything caught up with me and I feel guilty for making this so much worse than it already was. I'm only 19 and my life feels way too complicated!!! I miss being able to buy something because I wanted it instead of because I need it!

xxx

Firstly, you've taken the right step by posting here - you will get through this - I did - I'm starting to see the light now at the end of the tunnel and it will happen for you too.

I've also been there with the bullying bosses, you did well to get out of it when you did - it took me 5 years - but then I was stubborn and threatened to take them to court - I finally left with a very hefty payout - and no, I didn't learn my lesson with the debt I would recommend getting a free 30 min session with a solicitor to see if you have any case against them for constructive dismissal - if you're unemployed, you may even get legal aid as your partner isn't earning a huge amount. It may even be worth asking them about the situation with your gym.

As for why did they give you a credit card at such a young age - because that's what they do, they're fleecing g!ts and con many of us into thinking we've got such a great deal - until it all goes wrong.

Write to your credit card company and ask them to accept token payments and to freeze interest until you get a permanent job - print out your SOA and send it to them as well - if they say no, keep sending letters saying it's all you can afford - they may threaten dc's/court action etc, but it's just idle threats at this stage. Also set up a DD for the token payments each month, that way you are proving that you are keeping your word about paying - I did this with Next and eventually they agreed after I told them to transfer it to a dc as they would gladly accept my more than generous offer.

With regards to the gym - if you have all the letters you've sent them, print out copies and write a letter to their head office telling them how disappointed you are with their handling of your account and you request a refund of all monies taken after [date of your first letter], given them say a 2 week deadline, and tell them you will seek legal advice if you do not hear from them by said date.

Hope this helps.

sillylittlejill

hi I would do that but ironically enough it was a solicitors I was working at!! The boss that bullied me is well known for being a bully amongst local business and other solicitors, and I know from working there that I wouldnt have a leg to stand on. She didnt do anything officially (wrong word I think) wrong, it was just the way she treated me. Another friend of mine whom I met through working there was bullied by her as well and although she is currently on maternity leave, when she goes back she is on her final warning. She has done nothing wrong, is a good hard worker and is a good team player. Unless I could get a few of the people that have left because of her together, we couldnt do a thing. I know I wont be able to do that because they have all moved on etc.

I will write to the credit card company tonight, sending the letter off tomorrow morning, hopefully they won't kill me!

thanks for all your support so far guys, feel like I've achieved quite a bit this afternoon!

xxx

looktothefuture

sillylittlejill wrote: »

aw thanks

No Problems honey!

Just feel like I'm still a kid, why was I allowed a credit card?!?! I didnt think about what I was getting myself into.

That's sometims exactly what I feel! Why on earth was I, an immigrant from South Africa - just off the boat - allowed credit in a country I had no association with other than a visa!?!

You are in the right place though and there is loads of "special little helpers" on here that can and will give you all the advice you need!:D

LilDevil

sillylittlejill wrote: »

hi I would do that but ironically enough it was a solicitors I was working at!! The boss that bullied me is well known for being a bully amongst local business and other solicitors, and I know from working there that I wouldnt have a leg to stand on. She didnt do anything officially (wrong word I think) wrong, it was just the way she treated me. Another friend of mine whom I met through working there was bullied by her as well and although she is currently on maternity leave, when she goes back she is on her final warning. She has done nothing wrong, is a good hard worker and is a good team player. Unless I could get a few of the people that have left because of her together, we couldnt do a thing. I know I wont be able to do that because they have all moved on etc.

I will write to the credit card company tonight, sending the letter off tomorrow morning, hopefully they won't kill me!

thanks for all your support so far guys, feel like I've achieved quite a bit this afternoon!

xxx

That's a shame, are you sure it's not worth a visit to one of the competitors - I'm sure they'd love to have your boss :rotfl: