Young, stupid person in need of help!!!

sillylittlejill

Hi guys :wave:

I'm new here. Kinda hoping you guys will help me with your infinite wisdom

Basically, me and my OH have been living together for 7 months in a privately rented apartment. He has paid the bills and I paid the rent as they both came out at pretty much the same amount. At the time we were both working full time, him earning £11,500 and me earning £10,000.

I got a credit card when we first moved out as we didnt have any furniture etc and I was really naive and stupid and got everything we needed for the house and now I have reached the limit (£1400) and now is when we really need the money.

I left my job mid-October as I had put up with being bullied by my boss, had been signed off for a few weeks over the summer for depression because of it all, and I snapped and left. I got a job at a mobile phone retailing chain, and then found out that it was an xmas temp job and I only have a job from 1st december to 3rd january.

I am planning to go back to college in January and am looking for a part time job, but I don't know how to get out of debt. It doesnt sound like much, but its really stressing me out. I have a bad credit history because of a serious misunderstanding with my old gym taking money when I had cancelled the membership. Sent them a letter and havent heard since, but the money has still gone and I'm in £400 of debt to my old bank (NatWest)

This past month has been really hard, and although my OH is on more money now, he is having to pay the rent because of the job situation and we can't afford everything this month. I need about £400 for my bills and remainder of rent that OH can't afford and would ask if I could borrow it from my parents but my dad is an electrician and has been made redundant (finishes this week) so I can't ask if I can borrow money off them. I'm sure they'd give me it but that would leave them pretty poor over xmas and I'm basically too scared to ask!

I know this is a lot of problems but I need to do something, I'm just not sure what and need someone not involved to help with what to do.

I have been very stupid and naive but have grown up in the last few months so want to sort this out.

Help!!!!!!!!!!!!!


thanks xxxxxxxxxx:beer:

cally6008

Is it possible to look at other places to live in view to dropping your rent down and then possibly your council tax bills as well. I know this might not help right this minute but it could help later down the line.

princess-of-plastic

hey huny, welcome to mse. First of all don't panic! It will all come right in the end. If you can fill out a SOA (statement of affairs) and post it here, there are lots of super smart money savers on here who could help you make some cut backs etc which will help you until you are organised with a job etc. Are you up to date on your debt repayments so far?

pop xxx

Jesthar

Hey Jill,

Welcome to MSE! First things first - relax! You just landed in one of the best places in existance for dealing with debt!

Secondly, go make youtself a cup of tea. Then, take a deep breath, gather all your finace details together, and head over to the following link to put together what we call a Statement of Affairs (SoA):

http://www.makesenseofcards.com/soacalc.html

This is a sort of summary of your monthly finances, and helps the wonderful people here work out where you can make savings and how you can best pay off your debt. Fill out absolutely EVERYTHING as honestly as you can (you can always revise it later if you forget something), then use the 'MSE' button in the 'Format results' section near the bottom. That will give you a version of the results you can copy and paste straight into a new post in this thread, and people can get to work helping you sort things out.

Oh, and have you ever had charges applied to your bank account or credit cards? If so, they've been ruled unfair, and you should look at claiming them back.

*hugs*

~Jes

sillylittlejill

Hi again The problem we have is that things seem to be changing every day. My younger sister has just told me that my gym (im sure u guys will know which one) has sent a letter to her house (my parents) which I'm really worried about.

I wrote a letter to them on behalf of myself and other half, as it was a joint membership, telling them that I hadnt heard from them since my last letter telling them that I wanted to cancel the membership after the 2 months notice period. I told them that they were still attempting to take money out of my account even though the notice period was over. I asked them to write to me to let me know they had at my new address. Haven't heard anything from them since then until my sister told me about the letter. Not looking forward to finding out what it is. I'm so scared they are going to take me to Court or something. Everything seems to have gone wrong for me and I don't know what to do. I feel like I'm fighting a losing battle, I'm drowning, but won't sink or something. Its hard to explain. I've been having problems with stress and anxiety since the summer and it is coming back with a vengeance.

Please help, I honestly feel hopelss, don't know what to do. Feel like I'm the only person this is happening to even though I know I'm not.


Been crying all day on and off :'?(

Don't know what to do.

xxx

whatatwit

Hi hun, as well as doing the SOA thing for both of you, have you thought about making a doctors appointment.

Do also remember that you can put stuff on here in writing which may well make you feel better, often things that you can't share with family or friends as you don't want to burden them.

Have a dodgy hug :grouphug:

sillylittlejill

lol thanks for the dodgy hug, it does look a bit weird that!

I did in the summer and he signed me off for 3 weeks and told me to spend the time "enjoying life again". I felt like saying "are you paying??" I've always been one of those people who cries at the drop of a hat (I am available for weddings and funerals....hehe) so not many people seem to realise what its like. I can't really talk to my mother as I know i'd just worry her and she stresses too much anyway, my dad doesnt know what to do with money, just leaves it to mum!! I wish i had a really rich uncle or something!!! I've tried to do the SOA thing but not sure about everything, will try to do it again though. Not used my brain in a few weeks, has turned to mush!

thanks tho
xxx

whatatwit

If you put your cursor over the dodgy hug....it sounds even more dodgy

At least you found out now that the new job is only temporary, it does give you a bit of a chance to look for something else.

sarahs999

Try not to be so hard on yourself. You have found your way here and are trying to do something about your debt, and that's great. Now, stop crying, and go and fill in an SOA. We can't help you in any way until you do that. And fill it in honestly - it's very easy to underestimate but you'll only be hurting yourself!

JimmyTheWig

sillylittlejill wrote: »

me and my OH have been living together for 7 months in a privately rented apartment.
...
I don't know how to get out of debt.
...
my dad is an electrician and has been made redundant (finishes this week) so I can't ask if I can borrow money off them.

Just an idea, and I know this wouldn't suit everyone, but what are the chances of you two moving in to your parents' place for a while? You could pay them rent which would help them out at a difficult time, and it would help you as what you pay them would be less than what you currently pay.

sillylittlejill wrote: »

I've tried to do the SOA thing but not sure about everything, will try to do it again though.

Why not post what you've done and ask for advice on the bits you're not sure on.

looktothefuture

oh sweet, I'm so sorry that you are so upset! I know i've had days like that where I just don't stop crying BUT you've come to the right place to start a new beginning and we will help you every step of the way - afterall, we are all in the same position and I can guarantee that we've all felt as you do right now!