DFW starting out - any advice appreciated!

Chopsie&Chelvis

I feel stupid posting really because I feel like I should know what to do - just get on with paying! - and we're not, thank God, in a situation where we can't make repayments and have debt collectors at the door. BUT I just feel like this is drowning me, that we're treading water. I'm struggling to sleep since I had my 'light bulb moment' in late september. I just really need someone to say if I'm going the right way, what I can do etc.

I'm 25, hubby is 27, we're newlyweds (Aug 08) in a house we've owned since last year (Sept 07). I brought a lot of the debt into the relationship which I feel so ashamed about, probably £4000 - it was 50% getting out and setting up after an awful ex, 50% stupidity. The rest was contributing towards our wedding (£1000), paying back a student loan error they threatened to take me to court for (£800) and setting up our home. Here is my SOA.

Statement of Affairs and Personal Balance Sheet

Monthly Income Details
Monthly income after tax................ 840
Partners monthly income after tax....... 1350
Benefits................................ 0
Other income............................ 0
Total monthly income.................... 2190

Monthly Expense Details
Mortgage................................ 789
Secured loan repayments................. 0
Rent.................................... 0
Management charge (leasehold property).. 0
Council tax............................. 114
Electricity............................. 30
Gas..................................... 30
Oil..................................... 0
Water rates............................. 21
Telephone (land line)................... 10.5
Mobile phone............................ 20
TV Licence.............................. 11
Satellite/Cable TV...................... 0
Internet Services....................... 20
Groceries etc. ......................... 120
Clothing................................ 0
Petrol/diesel........................... 90
Road tax................................ 10
Car Insurance........................... 38
Car maintenance (including MOT)......... 0
Car parking............................. 0
Other travel............................ 0
Childcare/nursery....................... 0
Other child related expenses............ 0
Medical (prescriptions, dentist etc).... 15
Pet insurance/vet bills................. 6
Buildings insurance..................... 9
Contents insurance...................... 9
Life assurance ......................... 0
Other insurance......................... 0
Presents (birthday, christmas etc)...... 24
Haircuts................................ 0
Entertainment........................... 20
Holiday................................. 100
Emergency fund.......................... 0
Total monthly expenses.................. 1486.5

Assets
Cash.................................... 0
House value (Gross)..................... 115000
Shares and bonds........................ 0
Car(s).................................. 500
Other assets............................ 0
Total Assets............................ 115500

Secured Debts
Description....................Debt......Monthly...APR
Mortgage...................... 127703...(789)......6.79
Total secured debts........... 127703....-.........-

Unsecured Debts
Description....................Debt......Monthly...APR
Barclaycard CC.................403.......20........18
Virgin CC......................2748......25........0
Natwest CC.....................1528......36........0
Overdraft......................1900......0.........0
Natwest Grad Loan..............1390......59........7.9
Total unsecured debts..........7969......140.......-

Monthly Budget Summary
Total monthly income.................... 2,190
Expenses (including secured debts)....... 1,486.5
Available for debt repayments........... 703.5
Monthly UNsecured debt repayments....... 140
Surplus(deficit if negative)............ 563.5

Personal Balance Sheet Summary
Total assets (things you own)........... 115,500
Total Secured debt...................... -127,703
Total Unsecured debt.................... -7,969
Net Assets.............................. -20,172

Created using the SOA calculator at www.makesenseofcards.com.
Reproduced on Moneysavingexpert with permission.

The thing that amazes me is how little of that £563.50 lef over actually seems to be left over. We put £200 extra towards debt last month (and another £150 from ebay selling), but I just do not know where the rest goes. I'm probably 'frittering' £10-30 a week, same for hubby. We also seem to have so many 'emergency'/unexpected expenses - I suppose we're still learning how to manage financially, so things are still a shock. Last month, it was £15 in prescription charges and £10 in bandages/extra painkillers after an accident, this month £20 for work Christmas events (haven't paid this yet - probably won't be going).

I feel sick typing all this. I think the obvious thing is for me to get a 2nd job (only work 30 hrs a week, term time only) or a better job, but the reason I took a lower paid, lower stress part time job was A) still suffer exhaustion and weakness after a severe illness in my late teens and b) husband is a teacher - me being able to look after the home takes the pressure off him and saves running a second car (I drive him to/from work). Plus, I enjoy my job and it fits very well with having a family, which will be good, when we can afford one.

The only light in the tunnel is that I had a bad fall at work 2 months ago and I'm pursuing a compensation claim. I'm in agony with my wrist and elbow - still off work, on painkillers and in pain - but it might be a blessing in a [bloody good] disguise.

Any advice? And maybe a smack on the head, probably deserve it

misspoppy

Hi

Just a word of warning about your claim it can take years and years to get any money and its very stressfull. I had a very serious problem after a fall and I settled for 10% of the claim value due to the stress of it all so don't bank on that money especially if you have had medical problems in the past as they will use it against you.

dancingfairy

The best thing is that you have 563 a month spare - you just need to find it. A spending diary would probably help you the most 1) to find out where all the money is going and whether you SOA is realistic and 2) because it has a habit of making you stop and think about every single thing you spend and whether you can justify it.
The other thing you may find works is to get a set amount of cash out each week and then once it's gone , it's gone. Use this for personal spends etc.
P.S Unless you find out where the spare money is going I am not sure whether a second job would help as you would work harder and want to treat yourself more (as you are working so hard etc,etc) plus you've already highlighted how you don't think it is the best situation for you.
Anyway enough rambling.
Good Luck
df

boredofbeingathome

Try to keep a spending diary and raise your income if you can.Mystery shopping may fit into your lifestyle a bit better than another job at the moment. Or look at ways of getting a better salary in a more satisfying job.

Shop smarter, head over to the old style board and look for ways to reduce your outgoing and put extras to overpayments of credit cards.
Use online cashback sites like quidco.
If you can do without then do so, always ask yourself..do i need this? can i afford it?
No one gets a smack on the head here...unless of course they are wind up merchants out to cause trouble.

Oh and welcome to DFW.
BOB X

~Beanie~

LaurenManchester wrote: »

Statement of Affairs and Personal Balance Sheet

Monthly Income Details
Monthly income after tax................ 840
Partners monthly income after tax....... 1350
Benefits................................ 0
Other income............................ 0
Total monthly income.................... 2190

Monthly Expense Details
Mortgage................................ 789
Secured loan repayments................. 0
Rent.................................... 0
Management charge (leasehold property).. 0
Council tax............................. 114
Electricity............................. 30
Gas..................................... 30
Oil..................................... 0
Water rates............................. 21
Telephone (land line)................... 10.5
Mobile phone............................ 20
TV Licence.............................. 11
Satellite/Cable TV...................... 0
Internet Services....................... 20
Groceries etc. ......................... 120
Clothing................................ 0
Petrol/diesel........................... 90
Road tax................................ 10
Car Insurance........................... 38
Car maintenance (including MOT)......... 0 - Should be something in here
Car parking............................. 0
Other travel............................ 0
Childcare/nursery....................... 0
Other child related expenses............ 0
Medical (prescriptions, dentist etc).... 15
Pet insurance/vet bills................. 6
Buildings insurance..................... 9
Contents insurance...................... 9
Life assurance ......................... 0
Other insurance......................... 0
Presents (birthday, christmas etc)...... 24
Haircuts................................ 0 - Should be something here
Entertainment........................... 20
Holiday................................. 100 - Can cut this!
Emergency fund.......................... 0
Total monthly expenses.................. 1486.5

Assets
Cash.................................... 0
House value (Gross)..................... 115000
Shares and bonds........................ 0
Car(s).................................. 500
Other assets............................ 0
Total Assets............................ 115500

Secured Debts
Description....................Debt......Monthly...APR
Mortgage...................... 127703...(789)......6.79
Total secured debts........... 127703....-.........-

Unsecured Debts
Description....................Debt......Monthly...APR
Barclaycard CC.................403.......20........18
Virgin CC......................2748......25........0
Natwest CC.....................1528......36........0
Overdraft......................1900......0.........0
Natwest Grad Loan..............1390......59........7.9
Total unsecured debts..........7969......140.......-

Monthly Budget Summary
Total monthly income.................... 2,190
Expenses (including secured debts)....... 1,486.5
Available for debt repayments........... 703.5
Monthly UNsecured debt repayments....... 140
Surplus(deficit if negative)............ 563.5

Personal Balance Sheet Summary
Total assets (things you own)........... 115,500
Total Secured debt...................... -127,703
Total Unsecured debt.................... -7,969
Net Assets.............................. -20,172

Created using the SOA calculator at www.makesenseofcards.com.
Reproduced on Moneysavingexpert with permission.

Your SOA says that you should have £563 left each month but you are saying that you don't. I fthat is the case, you are either missing things from your SOA that you spend on or you are wasting money and don't know what on.

Try keeping a spending diary for a month, get a notebook and write down EVERYTHINg that you spend money on for a month. It will highlight just where your money goes! Those lunches at work, magazines etc soon add up!

Are your credit cards really 0% or is it just that you don't know the APR?

4littleone

Hi.

The £563.50 isd a really good surplus. I don't think you really need to give yourself the added stress of a second job just yet.

What you do need to do is start a spending diary and keep track of every penny. If you both do this and sit down at the end of the week you'll get a really good picture of what can be cut out.

Newspapers for example, you can read these free online.
Lunches at work/drinks/sweets etc. - take your own in.Saves loads of cash.
Visits to pub or cinema - rent a dvd instead, there are loads of trial things you can do such as lovefilm to get free rentals.
Meals out with hubby - do the £10 deal with M and S instead if you want a treat. Nice music, candles etc etc.

Your doing fantastically well to have over paid last month by such a lump. Keep it up and the debt will soon be gone. Make sure you concentrate on paying off the highest interest debt first. So Barclaycard needs to be the one to get the £200 for the next couple of months. Once it's gone make sure you don't use the card again.

Chopsie&Chelvis

Thank you everyone - ok, seems the spending diary is a must. Will have to pull myself together and admit just how much I spend on nothing.

Beanie- yes, CC are 0%, both for another 10 months. Car maintenance is done and paid for by my dad as he's an expert. No haircut costs for me, haven't had it cut since 2006 and before then ... don't even know! Hubby's is done by a friend for £5 every 2 months, will have to add that in. Holiday - yes, I should cut it and I would, but hubby just won't and seeing as I feel like this is my fault, I just can't bring myself to say 'no'. Will have to talk to him about it.

I am doing mystery shops and I try to ebay as much as I can, although not much to sell now - have got rid of everything unneeded worth selling. I think the job thing is what's troubling me most - I could easily earn more (1st class hons degree and MA) if I went full time/year round, which I'm just not sure about. I am watching out for jobs and would be willing to leave for a less satisfying job that paid more. I just don't think I could go full time.

Chopsie&Chelvis

4littleone wrote: »

Hi.

Meals out with hubby - do the £10 deal with M and S instead if you want a treat. Nice music, candles etc etc.

Your doing fantastically well to have over paid last month by such a lump. Keep it up and the debt will soon be gone. Make sure you concentrate on paying off the highest interest debt first. So Barclaycard needs to be the one to get the £200 for the next couple of months. Once it's gone make sure you don't use the card again.

I am throwing the cash at the Barclaycard, so glad that's right. It has already been cut up and hubby has put away the others.

Will have to have a look at the M&S deal - we're already using coupons every time we eat out and I don't drink, so it's a relatively inexpensive treat. However, I get the feeling it's where a lot of money's going - we're both foodies and it's one of our favourite things to do together. I will keep the spending diary as of today and see how much it really is.

Thank you everyone - the support is making me feel a bit teary (might be because I need my next dose of painkillers too, lol).

4littleone

aww, sorry you are in pain today.

I'm a bit of a foodie as well so i know where you are coming from!

You are doing so well though. It goes quicker than you think! And once you get organised and used to doing the debt free thing you become almost evangelical about it :rotfl: I'm always lecturing people on money saving and often have to stop myself from being boring

Chopsie&Chelvis

4littleone wrote: »

aww, sorry you are in pain today.

Thanks you! It's the cold making me ache - I sound 100 not 25! Ha ha.

Nothing to go in the diary yet today - but the hubby wants to watch football, so will have to resist buying a magazine to distract me. Am going to find a book instead.

Lauren

SamanthaA

Divorced, so don`t go on my experiences!!

But the one thing that strikes me on this board is that you need hubbys help.

You may thing the debts are yours for you to sort, rightly or wrongly, thats your decision; however to get a good sound financial base for the future you both need to be walking the same path.

That appears to be the biggest downfall for a lot of posters.

£500 a month is a lot to disappear & I am sure hubbys spending it too, so unless hes on board, a spending diary wont help!