It is tough NOW. So how are we coping

Butterflymind

Hi Taplady and everyone

You know you can get through tough situations like this, I've had rough times and you never think you can survive but you can. It's amazing what sources of inner strength you can find. So, grit your teeth, gird your loins, or whatever it is you need to do, and you can do it! :j

westcoastscot

Taplady congratulations on being almost there, and fingers crossed for the mot. We're doing ok but are stretched to the limit, my biggest problem is getting a good nights' sleep - I dream of the juggling act, always knowing if we drop a ball so to speak the whole lot will come tumbling down. It isn't debt, just supporting kids a little through college, my re-training to re-enter the workplace that kind of thing. If i can continue juggling two more years we'll be home and dry'ish
WCS

kidcat

westcoastscot wrote: »

Taplady congratulations on being almost there, and fingers crossed for the mot. We're doing ok but are stretched to the limit, my biggest problem is getting a good nights' sleep - I dream of the juggling act, always knowing if we drop a ball so to speak the whole lot will come tumbling down. It isn't debt, just supporting kids a little through college, my re-training to re-enter the workplace that kind of thing. If i can continue juggling two more years we'll be home and dry'ish
WCS

I know that feeling so well, the juggling and tbh in my case i still juggle, just because we are now debt free does not mean that we have loads of money now, I had always imagined we would but instead it became obvious that there were things that we had not been doing for years that couldnt be put off any more - yearly service for cars, saving for house deposit etc so the juggling cpntinues just in a different way and not so urgent, but I think once you have learnt to juggle its a skill you always feel it necessary to use

I know I am desperately saving to get a deposit to buy a house, in order to get us all moved back into our home town where the kids school. The commute each day is wearing me down. Time is running out as the rental on this house will not be renewed.

Each day more things come up that require money and I am desperately trying not to spend anything more than is absolutely necessary but it feels just like we are sinking some days.

Not helped by kids DD4 had chicken pox two weeks ago that is stubbornly not leavin, followed by a perforated ear drum meant she was sick on her birthday and her party had to be postponed, now DS6 has a stomach bug and has woken up with chicken pox today on his 6th birthday so party number two has been cancelled!!

DS11 - has developed a really bad attitude towards schooling as well and is obstructing all attempts to help him, having had some problems in the past he is already behind but he looks upon extra help as a punishment. So everything is a battle with him, and school will only tolerate so much before removing all help.

Sorry for the rant but its been a bad week and have slept so little in the last two weeks (havent actually been to bed for past two nights cos DS6 has been vomitting all night).

Things are definitely tough atm, but whoever said that its about girding your loins is right. Time for heads down against the onslaught and standing firm. Sometimes the achievement is in standing still, cos it means you havent slipped backwards. For me now is one of those times I think.

Pitlanepiglet

westcoastscot wrote: »

I dream of the juggling act, always knowing if we drop a ball so to speak the whole lot will come tumbling down.

I know that feeling, I'm currently our only wage earner and whilst I've supported myself for years the pressure of trying to keep it all going and to keep the balls in the air to stop it all spiralling away is horrid....

On a slightly different note...am I the only person who seems to be the only person in their house able to operate a toilet brush :mad:

BigMummaF

Butterflymind wrote: »

Hi Taplady and everyone

You know you can get through tough situations like this, I've had rough times and you never think you can survive but you can. It's amazing what sources of inner strength you can find. So, grit your teeth, gird your loins, or whatever it is you need to do, and you can do it! :j

And so much easier to do, with the support of like-minded folk on here. The internet does have some very good uses at times Of course, when I said 'easier', that was in terms of finally realising you are not totally alone & others are in very similar situations. It's been mentioned before how mse is rather like a huge garden fence, with groups of virtual neighbours leaning across to chat about allsorts--an image that warms my soul

kidcat wrote: »

I know that feeling....I had always imagined we would but instead it became obvious that there were things that we had not been doing for years that couldnt be put off any more.....

DS11 - has developed a really bad attitude towards schooling as well and is obstructing all attempts to help him, having had some problems in the past he is already behind but he looks upon extra help as a punishment. So everything is a battle with him, and school will only tolerate so much before removing all help....

That's what I find so frustrating about the tv programmes on 'saving' money. The "look-at-me-I'm-on-a-celebrity-& can-show-you-what-to-do-for-a-week" ones are the worst--ANYONE can live on benefits for seven days but come back when you've done it for seven MONTHS & tell me it's so simple :mad:

As for the issues with your son, please don't give up on him --not for a nano-second thinking you would! I had awful times & ended up schooling at home as our LEA is so dire in accepting dyslexia, school phobia etc as being real. In all honesty, I bitterly regret NOT doing it before, but like many I assumed the Establishment wouldn't let us down. I was so wrong & now my children are paying the price for my ignorance.

sammy_kaye18

Hi All

I have a poem next to my bed entitled 'dont quit' which i read every morning as my incentive to keep going and not give in although I know that to put it bluntly if I give in or give up then we are pretty much up sh@t creek as I pay 90% of the bills in the house! but my favourite line from it is the last ones that say
"So stick to the fight when you're hardest hit--
It's when things seem worst that you must not quit."
http://www.thedontquitpoem.com/thePoem.htm

Figured I'd stop in and give you all an update on how we are all doing this end.

Well as you can see from my signature we now know that we have a beautiful pink baby bump on the way to us and I have been busy planning her arrival although I'm thinking I'm relatively lucky as we have a fair bit still form Ben and being that I've had one already I know what I'll use and what I wont so no over spending is going to be done.

Boyfriend has been trying his best not to go overdrawn and is so far doing well - he has £10 still in his account but that's going to be needed for bread/milk I expect until I'm paid on Tuesday. Have been carefully watching our money situation though lately and making sure everything is paid or accounted for and anything left is put aside for basics.

Thankfully we are both ok job wise at the minute but my maternity leave is going to be starting in June so I only have 2 months of a definite wage as I only work 12 hours I am not entitled to SMP so will have to go onto maternity allowance and they are trying to force me to have a year off at the minute but I'm thinking 6 months will be ok for me for the basic maternity leave although I have to get a move on with getting my Maternity Allowance ball sorted now.

I have been watching what we have been eating/cooking etc especially after our last gas/electric bill came thudding through the door :mad: annoyed with myself over that but hoping because its now every 6 months i get a statement that it should go down considerably if any warmer weather decides to reach Wales this year.

My slow cooker however gave up the ghost the other day - most unamused - think a new one is in order - love home-made soup so need more of it!

Although I am currently living on fruit and veg at the minute because I have a thing about things crunching so a nice healthy diet for me at the minute! Although have also realised that in process of cleaning out cupboards all my baking tins have gone walk about so think i might buy some more this month! Have decided to try and make £80 I have available form my first lot of money last as long as possible food wise though so we'll see how well I manage with that when there's me, boyfriend, Ben, a small dog and two terrapins to feed although im finding alternatives are going down well at the minute. Hoping to try and grow some bits and pieces this year even if its basic veg like carrots, swede and onions - that in itself will save us a fair bit and I can gift extra to my mum and mother in law!

Also we have a role reversal in my household whereas most people are worrying about their children Im worrying about my mother - she currently £900 overdrawn and no matter what hours she's working etc she just cant seem to get any further out of it - a lot of that is thanks to her useless ex boyfriend who was made redundant and didn't like the shame of being on job seekers allowance so he didn't claim anything to help and left her with all the household bills by herself as well as feeding the two of them. So now hes gone im hoping she'll manage to get herself sorted to a degree but when she comes to visit i make sure I've done a last minute coop shop the night before for things like reduced bread/rolls , veg etc etc and put it all in the freezer and then conveniently mention that 'oh we probably wont use it all' and send her home with a bag or two of food. Last time she visited she had lunch here (jacket potato with grated cheese and beans) and I sent her home with a full bag of food, a bag with two fleece blankets in it (I overdid the blanket buying) and a box of dried cat food I was given by a work colleague who's cat had sadly passed away. Although hoping she looks after herself with it all and her pets and my sister or auntie doesn't go round with an open hand! :mad::mad::mad::mad::mad::mad: was most shocked the otehr day when a family friend visited and said that she has been considering partial bankruptcy :eek:

oh what a fun time we are all having lately

PITLANE - yeah i am the only person in this house who can use a toilet brush too.

KIDKAT - hope kiddies are better.

Lots of love and hugs to all who need them. x x x x x

anguk

Pitlanepiglet wrote: »

I know that feeling, I'm currently our only wage earner and whilst I've supported myself for years the pressure of trying to keep it all going and to keep the balls in the air to stop it all spiralling away is horrid....

On a slightly different note...am I the only person who seems to be the only person in their house able to operate a toilet brush :mad:

Nope you're not the only one. I'm the only one in our house who can operate a toilet brush and open a new pack of toilet rolls and put empty loo roll inners in the bin. I also seem to be the only one who can put towels on the rail after using them so they dry. :mad:

sammy_kaye18

anguk wrote: »

Nope you're not the only one. I'm the only one in our house who can operate a toilet brush and open a new pack of toilet rolls and put empty loo roll inners in the bin. I also seem to be the only one who can put towels on the rail after using them so they dry. :mad:

lol - they are my jobs too - though it had my 5 year old trained but think he has taken his fathers attitude instead!

kidcat

Me too. No matter how much I explain, nag moan or even cry toilet rolls are never replaced and the inners are left all over bathroom till I move them. have taken to trying to get kids more involved but have failed in the toilet roll dept.
Great to hear from you sammykaye

Hardup_Hester

Well I'm even more grateful hubby has got another job, I had my council tax bill & my water bill in the post today, between them they have gone up £11.30 a month, funnily enough my wages haven't gone up this year, not at all, never mind by £11 a month. I'm seriously considering having a water meter, I wonder if that will bring my water bill down. As for the council tax, there is nothing I can do to reduce that, so the money will have to be scraped out of a different pot.
Hester