It is tough NOW. So how are we coping

[Deleted User]

I just saw your post sunflower. Lot and lots of positive vibes are coming your way. You need a hug and I am giving you one

Caterina

Hi Sunflower, sorry that you are feeling so down, but I can well understand why! It must be very difficult for you and your DH and frustrating as well (also can really relate to shouting at the TV!). All I can say is that your posts read like they are written by a strong and determined woman and from what I read I am sure that you have all the resources to make it through the crisis. But - having said that - I think kittie is right in her post above and that you need a hug, here's another one on the way:

((((((((((((HUG!)))))))))))))

All the best,

Caterina

ceridwen

Hope things work out for you soon Sunflower......and another virtual hug en route..............

Can well understand what a shock this would be and £60.50 benefit per week is just pathetic. It wasnt a kings ransom payable last time I was unemployed - years and years ago as it was - but manageable (just about). The amount now is absolutely peanuts....the Government has cut and cut and cut in every way they possibly can at benefit levels basically. With that - I can well understand why I'm seeing people going round looking "shellshocked" at present. I dont think people realise JUST how low benefit is for most people - they assume it will be enough to live on - until they actually come to claim and realise...

If the only anger you are showing is shouting at the tv set - then you are doing EXTREMELY well....

I can recall a brave friend telling me JUST how obviously angry with life I clearly had been for some time after being declared redundant for the first time all those years back.....eerrrrr....yep....just a tad obviously. So - I can certainly understand feeling anger - I guess the way to look at this anger you are obviously feeling/entitled to feel is to try and turn it around and use it as positive energy to go after whatever objectives you decide on - be it giving all the jobfinding help you can to O.H. or whatever. Personally - I found eventually that it was an idea to turn that Anger Energy towards things like springcleaning/good long walks and the like - then at least I had found some constructive use for it and it stopped me turning it in more "negative" directions.

EDIT: ...and that was an extremely kind offer from your veggiebox guy. What a nice person. Its thoughts of the offers of help like that (sometimes from unexpected sources) that help you to keep a bit of faith in human nature and hope to keep going.

Aril

Hugs to all those who are in need today. I picked up the free Tesco instore magazine today and it has a week's worth of menu for feeding a family on a budget. I'm sure the Old Stylers could reduce the estimated cost yet further but it could make a starting point for those new to meal planning or feeling too stressed to do the thinking involved.
Just after OH was made redundant I adopted "what doesn't kill you will only make you stronger" as my personal mantra when I was beginning to panic [I did all my worrying in the middle of the night because OH wasn't coping and I felt that I needed to maintain a strong front all the time] and feeling overwhelmed by it all. The other cost free thing I did that I'd read about somewhere was to have a holi-hour [ a very cut down and cost free version of a holiday:D] when I began to feel myself go into freefall...it was basically an hour in which I looked after myself and did something pleasurable. In my case it was knitting squares for a charity blanket as I couldn't concentrate on anything more complicated at that time.
Aril

Patchwork_Quilt

Hi Sunflower

I agree, £60.50 per week is absolutely rubbish. Sending you a ((hug)). Hope things get better soon.

mardatha

But that's the benefits system all over--all this talk of people taking foreign holidays and buying plasma tvs is hype, and the £60 dole money is the reality.
Kittie, I'm with you on the immune system for over 50s...I have no immune system at all and it leaves you open to just anything at all. What do you take ?

kidcat

mardatha wrote: »

But that's the benefits system all over--all this talk of people taking foreign holidays and buying plasma tvs is hype, and the £60 dole money is the reality.
Kittie, I'm with you on the immune system for over 50s...I have no immune system at all and it leaves you open to just anything at all. What do you take ?

It amazes me that benefits are still imagined to be great, the media image is of the family on benefits with new car, big TV, holidays etc, when the reality is so much harsher.

Hearig all the stories here, brings home to me just how bad things really are, I avoid news programmes cos its all about making news rather than reporting facts. My DH is in a very shaky industry and if the economy continues like this reality will hit and his firm will close. I am now busy preparing for the owrst and trying to educate the children to think along the same lines.
A friend who lost his highly paid job has a daughter completely unable to adapt to their life on considerably less money, expecting the same lifestyle they had before. Its hard to watch as they struggle to find money to meet her "request".

Icemaiden

I wasn't going to comment on this as I know its is a very touchy subject but, if you rent your property and claim benefits you are considerably better off then if you have a mortgage. Whilst you might only receive £60 odd pounds a week from one agency you then have your rent paid in full and your council tax paid. Surely this should ALL be taken into account when totting up the final amount or is it that because HB is paid directly to the landlord/council/HA that people don't include it

Iam in no way pointing the finger at anyone here, I want to make that very clear, and agree it is a small amount to live on when one has paid into the system for many years but it can be done as many people have shown and in the current climate more people will have to do so. There will be no room for luxuries just basic living, food, heat, light and water everything else can wait, its going to be a hugh wake up call for many people in this country who have got use to having anything & everything they want, I believe these times have passed, whether we come out of it the other end in tact who knows I hate been negative but think we need to be realistic about the situation were in, I've no idea how long it will last but have heard reports were in for the long haul. The last recession (early 90's) very nearly banked us as a family, I had a new baby, just bought this house, OH lost his job and had to re-train and it was the survival skills I learned then which hopefully will see us through this one, christ I remember not knowing where the money for the next loaf of bread was going to come from and it was only 9p from Tesco's:rotfl:

Hugs to all who are in dire straights atm,

There but for the grace of god.....

Ice
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chrisbethany

Hi All

DH was made redundant when his firm closed down in Nov, and no sign of a job yet - a good thing I have one, and I'm amazed how we get by, cos you wouldn't say it is well paid. Such a lot to be thankful for - a warm, dry home, family, good health, lots of HM recipes, and growing and sewing to see us through. I am also so grateful to God for friends and my church family - sitting here typing in all hand me downs (except undies!!:rotfl: ). DDs are grown and flown, so no chance of benefits except DH's £60.50. Thankfully our mortgage is small, compared to some - I feel for all those who were given HUGE mortgages and now really struggling, especially those who've never learned to make do and mend etc. I'm glad that I've graduated through the school of hard knocks most of my adult life (56 now:o ) - it's that ww2 spirit, and we need to encourage others with it. Just so relieved that my 2 DDs have it too.

Keep smiling - Spring and the longer days are on their way:T and we can get cracking with those HG veg!

Love to my virtual friends,

Chris

Icemaiden

chrisbethany wrote: »

Hi All

DH was made redundant when his firm closed down in Nov, and no sign of a job yet - a good thing I have one, and I'm amazed how we get by, cos you wouldn't say it is well paid. Such a lot to be thankful for - a warm, dry home, family, good health, lots of HM recipes, and growing and sewing to see us through. I am also so grateful to God for friends and my church family - sitting here typing in all hand me downs (except undies!!:rotfl: ). DDs are grown and flown, so no chance of benefits except DH's £60.50. Thankfully our mortgage is small, compared to some - I feel for all those who were given HUGE mortgages and now really struggling, especially those who've never learned to make do and mend etc. I'm glad that I've graduated through the school of hard knocks most of my adult life (56 now:o ) - it's that ww2 spirit, and we need to encourage others with it. Just so relieved that my 2 DDs have it too.

Keep smiling - Spring and the longer days are on their way:T and we can get cracking with those HG veg!

Love to my virtual friends,

Chris

What a lovely post:A with that in mind I'm off to bed, night night folks,

Ice
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