RSVP etiquette

Evie82

I have asked for the RSVP for my wedding day invites to be back to me by a certain date, which has now passed by about 2 weeks.
I still have some people who haven't let me know either way and its really bugging me.

So what is the etiquette and what should i do about it?

I would like to tell them all they have missed the date and that i assume they are not coming, in a letter, would that be ok? I have reminded these people a few days before the RSVP date and after the date also, so its just rude surely that they are still not letting me know?

[Deleted User]

You tried phoning them?

Evie82

I have spoken to one of them yes and they said they were posting it off same day, as it has a menu card too, its not come, this was 2 weeks ago.

The other one is a distant relative and i dont have their number, however another relative of mine reminded them and they also said they would post it asap, 2 weeks ago.........

Scruff74

Hi

Do you want them to come and are annoyed at their tardiness?

Or do you feel they've missed their chance and can't come now want to or not?

I think if you wrote to them saying something along the lines of ....'I'm really sorry you can't make our wedding, would have been lovely to see you there but we'll be sure to email you some pics/post you some cake yada yada yada'


I think if they were genuinly sorry and really did want to come you'd get a phone call and if you don't hear anything then you can happily cross them off!

Evie82

They havent missed the chance as such, i could still have them, however yes, i am annoyed firstly and secondly these people are all the sort of people who wont turn up on the day if they get a better offer.

One of them is my dad, can you believe that! My OWN dad hasn't RSVP to his daughters wedding, he wasn't happy about te wedding as we wanted to do something other than a pub and a p*ss up, he didnt want to pay for any of it, he didnt want to wear the same suit as my bubby to be and then he didnt even RSVP. No contact, nothing.

I would like to be able to tell them and the others who havent got back to me, that the invitation is closed and they missed their chance really, to save myself the worry of them not turning up and having empty seats and to show them that we are doing it reguardless of if they want to come or not.

flowerscotland

Evie82 wrote: »

They havent missed the chance as such, i could still have them, however yes, i am annoyed firstly and secondly these people are all the sort of people who wont turn up on the day if they get a better offer.

One of them is my dad, can you believe that! My OWN dad hasn't RSVP to his daughters wedding, he wasn't happy about te wedding as we wanted to do something other than a pub and a p*ss up, he didnt want to pay for any of it, he didnt want to wear the same suit as my bubby to be and then he didnt even RSVP. No contact, nothing.

I would like to be able to tell them and the others who havent got back to me, that the invitation is closed and they missed their chance really, to save myself the worry of them not turning up and having empty seats and to show them that we are doing it reguardless of if they want to come or not.

I think its downright rude to be invited to a wedding and not have the decency to reply :mad: maybe you should just carry on without them, as they have had plenty of time to reply.

And omg do we have the same dad :eek: everything you have said about your dad is how my dad has reacted to my own wedding, huge (((hugs))) coming your way as I know how you feel.

My own dad refused to wear the same as the best man and my OH and then he said I needed to pay for everyones suits who attended the wedding :rolleyes: but he has not offered a penny to help with anything, not that I want it, I dont, but he cant dictate to me who I have to pay for.

Bl*ody families !!!!

Evie82

flowerscotland wrote: »

I think its downright rude to be invited to a wedding and not have the decency to reply :mad: maybe you should just carry on without them, as they have had plenty of time to reply.

And omg do we have the same dad :eek: everything you have said about your dad is how my dad has reacted to my own wedding, huge (((hugs))) coming your way as I know how you feel.

My own dad refused to wear the same as the best man and my OH and then he said I needed to pay for everyones suits who attended the wedding :rolleyes: but he has not offered a penny to help with anything, not that I want it, I dont, but he cant dictate to me who I have to pay for.

Bl*ody families !!!!

Thanks for your reply. Im with you on the dad bit, i dont want his money, its just the fact he thought he could tell me how to get married and where it should be, its just unbelievable.

I think im going to pen a little note to all the NON rsvp people saying sorry that they cannot make it and leave it at that.

flowerscotland

you are welcome hun Someone on this forum said to me go ahead and plan the wedding, and do it, its what you want to do, its you and your OH that matter now. So stuff them all !

Good luck with the rest of your planning, and I think thats a great idea about writing the notes.

blonde36er

As I understand it parents don't have to RSVP to their own child's wedding invite, this might be why your Dad hasn't responded - it's assumed they will be attending as they're your parents!

x

Evie82

Ok fair point thank you.
Would that also stand when there is a menu card with his name on, asking him to send it back?
He doesnt want to come anyway, its just a hypothetical question.

flowerscotland

blonde36er wrote: »

As I understand it parents don't have to RSVP to their own child's wedding invite, this might be why your Dad hasn't responded - it's assumed they will be attending as they're your parents!

x

Not everything is so black and white in real life Have you READ evies posts