Harassment/Sexual Harassment At Work

lufcgirl

Hi,
Posting this on behalf of my housemate, I'm getting most of the news every night when she comes in from work and I'm after some advice with regards as to how to proceed.

My housemate started work in July 2008 for a well know mobile phone firm in a call centre however dealing with administration (no calls). She is employed by another well known agency on initially a three month contract which has now been extended to beyond Christmas.

When she started, she was trained up by a very cocksure/large guy (actually one of the ugliest men I have ever seen!) who flirted quite a bit. It was made clear during the first week this guy was a serial flirt who just joked on with everyone and is infact married.
It comes to week two in this job, and this guy (her manager) texts her asking her to meet him after work in a car park on a large industrial estate. She goes, not wanting to upset management (it later turns out he's just a permanent employee doing the job nobody else wanted to do in training the temps up) and they meet. At this point he starts to say he's unhappy in his marriage and he's never felt this way about anyone in the office before and finds her beautiful etc and basically comes onto her. She told him there was no chance and had to become quite forceful. Then the guy comes out with the line 'you don't want to get on the wrong side of me, you know who they'd choose'. Obviously meaning about terminating her contract.

She ignored the threats and continued with her job. However this guy started texting and 'poking' her on facebook constantly. Changing her number was not an option so she just deleted the messages. It persisted along with a lot of sexual innuendo at work and him saying how fit she was etc. He kept calling her into meetings saying he wanted to check she was ok after seeing her facebook status and cos she wasn't talking to him.
The final straw came when he called her by his wife's name deliberately. She went to a manager who said he would sit in on their next team meeting and observe this guys behaviour.
It worked, the guy was spotted doing the sexual innuendo infront of 6 other people and directing it all at my housemate. A note was made and he was ordered to not contact her outside of work and only e-mail her if it was work related and everything would be monitored. It stopped for a while, until another girl on another department put in a complaint about him and he was suspended for two weeks.

This was absolute bliss for my housemate, she could get on with her job and he didn't contact her. Then he came back to work.
This time, he started to get quite malicious..saying she'd ruined his life when she'd done nothing of the sort to encourage him. She deleted him from facebook and started making a record of when he contacted her by text.
Then one night last week, he followed her to her car after work and proceeded to grab her between the legs, not allowing her to get into her car.

Now obviously we are all concerned for her safety, this guy is an absolute nightmare. Me, her parents, her other friends have all said she needs to contact her work, but she is petrified of having her contract terminated or nobody believing her.
The poor girl is scared to even go to work now because of him...and I'm not joking when I say this guy is twice the size of Jonny Vegas! I'm all for going there and smacking him one, but she says not to.
Does anyone have any words of support or advice on what to do next?
I feel so sorry for her!!

dawnybabes

How awful for her - Can she not go straight to the police ?

SomeBozo

Then one night last week, he followed her to her car after work and proceeded to grab her between the legs, not allowing her to get into her car.

There is no point contacting work over this. Or her parents. Or her friends.

This needs to goto the police.

If none of the above happened before this incident, it would still be a police issue.

I suggest your friends reports the inicident to the police and provides work with a copy of the report.

I do think your post falls outside the normal scope of " Employment, Jobseeking and Training".

Bozo

lufcgirl

Thats what we've suggested but again she's terrified of losing her job with only being on a temporary contract. He's been banned from things like calling her into unattended meetings. He changed his break especially two days ago because her facebook status said something like '**** is mad right now and wants to hit something' and he decided to go and question her on it, acting as if he's some sort of manager when he's been banned.

I really just want to see him outside and smack him one!

There is no CCTV in the carpark so it would be his word against hers, and she's scared of that too and that she'll be made out to look a liar.

tinkerbell84

lufcgirl wrote: »

This was absolute bliss for my housemate, she could get on with her job and he didn't contact her. Then he came back to work.
This time, he started to get quite malicious..saying she'd ruined his life when she'd done nothing of the sort to encourage him. She deleted him from facebook and started making a record of when he contacted her by text.
Then one night last week, he followed her to her car after work and proceeded to grab her between the legs, not allowing her to get into her car.

lufcgirl wrote:

He changed his break especially two days ago because her facebook status said something like '**** is mad right now and wants to hit something' and he decided to go and question her on it, acting as if he's some sort of manager when he's been banned.

How can he still see her facebook status?!

I agree with the others - no job is worth this. She should go to the police, and take the employer to court if they sack her.

greenbee

If she won't involve the police, she needs to speak to work again and raise a formal grievance. In the meantime she should also start looking for another contract. She should also change her facebook settings so that her details are only available to people she knows and trusts.

I assume that she is fairly young and inexperienced. There is no way on earth she should be agreeing to meet anyone in a carpark on an industrial estate, and there is no reason to meet new work colleagues outside work if you don't want to.

Does she have a friend who might be able to pose as her boyfriend when she's out from work, and might be the kind of person who would put this guy off?

Ultimately her safety is more important than anything else, and by not dealing with this she is letting the guy think he can get away with this and he will continue to behave in this way to her and to others.

Incisor

She is a bit naive, ain't she? Meeting the guy after work in a carpark. Deleting texts and other evidence of what has been happening. The reason I am so blunt about this shortcoming on her part is that she needs to be more bloodyminded about dealing with this person.

It must be reported to the employer and she must expect them to deal with it. She is possibly going to have to really dig her heels in to make it happen and she does need to accept that softly softly to avoid a fuss is just going to prolong the agony

lufcgirl

He managed to see it through some mutual colleague at work. I've text her as she's away at the moment saying I'd go to the police station with her and report it when she's back. However she is so frightened as I guess she doesn't have much rights with her being on a temp contract with an agency.

Could I go into the agency and make an anonymous report about it all or anything? I'm so worried about her


She is very naive about it, however has just finished a degree at a Uni a long time away so it's not like she's not streetwise. I think as well maybe she was just feeling a bit lonely, and it wasn't like the carpark was deserted, it was 5.30pm and people were about.
Me and her used to be in a relationship and we recently broke up. He knew she was gay, and that was just cause for more comments from him, not that she intended him to know, only reason he found out was when I sent flowers to her work.
Believe me, I've tried the line of 'it'll happen to someone else if you don't report it' and she is just simply too frightened to do anything and doesn't think anyone would believe her

greenbee

Being on a temp contract does not affect her rights in this situation. Employers should and do take this kind of thing seriously.

As Incisor says, she needs to keep evidence not destroy it - I had issues with malicious calls to my mobile several years ago and the police were extremely supportive in dealing with the complete stranger who was making them.

I don't think there is any point in you speaking to the agency. She needs to speak to the company (request a meeting with either HR or the person responsible for managing agency staff), the agency (and request a transfer) and the police. The police may not be able to do much more than scare the guy, but it does mean that if the situation deteriorates they have a record of previous problems being reported.

And try to persuade her not to meet strange men in carparks on her own. It's never a good idea.

Skint_Catt

I agree that she really needs to contact the police to report an assault. Secondly she needs to go straight to her HR Manager or line manager and raise a grievance (its important she uses this word) with regard to sexual/harrasment from this guy. They MUST take action - if they do nothing she can take the company & the agency to an Employment Tribunal and EVERYTHING this guy has done will be dug up - he won't want that if two weeks suspension gets him riled! (Plenty of free legal advice around and she can claim costs from the Tribunal if it gets that far) She needs to keep/record as many texts/emails/incidents as humanly possible.

What happens if she ends up without a job? She goes and finds another - it may seem a hard time to do it, but there IS work out there!

Incisor

lufcgirl wrote: »

He managed to see it through some mutual colleague at work. I've text her as she's away at the moment saying I'd go to the police station with her and report it when she's back. However she is so frightened as I guess she doesn't have much rights with her being on a temp contract with an agency.

Could I go into the agency and make an anonymous report about it all or anything? I'm so worried about her

Please don't! I think you will make yourself part of a larger problem rather than part of the solution. More than anything this is about your friend being assertive, making her own decisions and carrying them through - which she needs to deal with this character.

She is very naive about it, however has just finished a degree at a Uni a long time away so it's not like she's not streetwise. I think as well maybe she was just feeling a bit lonely, and it wasn't like the carpark was deserted, it was 5.30pm and people were about.
Me and her used to be in a relationship and we recently broke up. He knew she was gay, and that was just cause for more comments from him, not that she intended him to know, only reason he found out was when I sent flowers to her work.
Believe me, I've tried the line of 'it'll happen to someone else if you don't report it' and she is just simply too frightened to do anything and doesn't think anyone would believe her

Bloke's perspective and with respect [cliche!], you may be one of the last people who could help by getting involved on her behalf [ie anything beyond talking with her]. Her gayness WILL make her more interesting, but her non assertiveness might make her less able to deal with unwanted attention. Your involvement would essentially protective - which will allow her to avoid confronting the issue, plus your former relationship will get in the way.

In some respects, actually she is dealing with it. She has been forceful in rejecting an advance, she has taken a complaint forward. She will probably work out hte right way for her of dealing with this.