How c**p is this

calleyw

Bossyboots wrote:

I agree.

Neither of my children were expected to contribute from their part time jobs while still in education but as soon as they started to work after leaving, they have had to pay their keep.

When I was on IS about 12 years ago I was getting about £40 a fortnight so £80 a month. I still had pay my parents £10 a week keep. But my parents where on a low income themselves and none this WTC or CTC.

So left over for clothes, going out and personal items a whole £40 month. A £10 a week.

You quickly learn what is important and what is worth having.


Yours

Calley

lallyaya

I moved out of home shortly after I left school but then moved back three years later to save money to go travelling. When I told my parents I ws coming home (note told and not asked) they said I would have to pay £50 a week rent etc. as it was costing them a bit to have me back. After an initial grumble I soon shut up and got on with it, and really it was not a bad deal, lovely house, breakfast and lunch prepared from superb self-service buffet that was my mothers fridge, delicious dinner prepared every night, regular glasses of wine from the well stocked bar, regular use of the car (hmm and petrol) most of my toiletries, always picking me up a lovely top or skirt that she saw on sale, most of the things I needed for travelling, and my all time favourite. The magic washing bin. Clothes go in dirty and, as if by magic, they appear in my room beautifully clean and fragrant and perfectly ironed, the magic bin always manages to match up the socks properly as well a feat I have never managed...... Wonderful my mum is a lucky woman with that contraption.

How I wish things were the same now as my bills total £700 per months (not including debts) for a rubbish flat and boring food AND my washing bin is certainly not magic! Don't grumble - trust me you will be looking back wistfully on these times!

I can't wait to go home for Christmas!! Big hugs for my lovely Mum!

johanne

black-saturn wrote:

Your outgoings are about £50 more than my monthly income!!!

Yeah i know they are high.. main problem is the rent and council tax, Rent because i rent from a private landlord and since Liverpool won Capital of Culture 2008 the house/rent prices have shot right up! The average one bed flat around here (when you can find one...) is £450pcm+ im lucky having found a 2 bed terrace house for what i pay.. and thats only cos im in/on the border of a rough area of the city and the house was unfurnished and really basic i.e. without even a cooker or anything.. and the finish is poor. Ive had to do loads myself to make it even liveable.

My council tax should be going down to about £71 in april (thats including single person discount) because at the moment im playing "catch up" from when i moved in. Similary my water should go down to about £18.

Then my gas and leccy are pre-payment meters the landlord wont let me change.. so i just changed over to ebico and will hopefully be able to cut it down to £15 each a month. fingers crossed!

I know im lucky to live in a 2 bed house by myself.. but my income is coming down to £650 a month this week as im going back to work part time due to health problems so im having to really cut back and possibly move into a rougher part of the city in a bedsit or something!

pagan705

This thread really reminds me of my two brothers aged 24 & 26 !!!! :eek: Both still at home & paying nothing for their keep while one has a very good job & my parents struggle to pay the mortgage & all the bills ...all the while playing the permanent cash machine to my brothers when all their pay has gone on going out :beer: within the first two weeks of the month.

One day they are going to move out into the real world & get the shock of their lives !!!!! :eek: :T

Bossyboots

pagan705 wrote:

This thread really reminds me of my two brothers aged 24 & 26 !!!! :eek: Both still at home & paying nothing for their keep while one has a very good job & my parents struggle to pay the mortgage & all the bills ...all the while playing the permanent cash machine to my brothers when all their pay has gone on going out :beer: within the first two weeks of the month.

One day they are going to move out into the real world & get the shock of their lives !!!!! :eek: :T

Have you spoken to your parents about this? They have to take some responsibility for allowing this to happen but maybe they need someone to step in and help broach the subject.

Otherwise, can you speak to your brothers about it?

I found it really hard to take my children's money when they started working but they both volunteered it anyway so I didn't have the awkwardness of asking. I know it is right that they should pay but I did feel uncomfortable at first so maybe your parents felt the same and things have just drifted.

System

black-saturn wrote:

Actually I do believe that unless the parents are really hard up they shouldnt charge for keep until their children get a proper job. How are they supposed to save for their future if they are dishing out money to their parents all the while? At that rate they will always be living at home because they cant afford anything else.

The problem with that is, if kids can get away with paying any board they will do, my three eldest children resented paying a penny towards their keep and two of them were work shy too. As for what money they all have/had in wages - they havent got a penny to their name cause as fast as its come in - its gone out again.

My third child did well at college and was accepted into a university after she sat her exams as her grades were good. However, she turned her nose up at the idea to settle for a job working 30 hours a week in Safeway as a checkout operator. She complained about the pay and having to pay board as well and she couldnt understand why we couldnt support her when she was at work when we said we would support her through uni. Then when the store made her redundant she got a 20 hour a week job in a pub. She has no intention of finding another one, but complains bitterly that shes got no cash.

All my kids had paper rounds, and were taught to save from an early age and i would have thought their fathers hard working attitude would have stood for something - but maybe not.

Her boyfriend is 25 and pays no board whatsoever, hes got a decent paid job but recons he cant afford to move out. I guess, in 6 years time he will be saying the same thing. I am not saying all kids are the same, thats like tarring them all with the same brush, but the majority of people i know with teenage kids are going through the same issues with their kids.

black-saturn

I think thats just a teenage problem. Teenagers are awkward. When they reach their 20's I think you'll find they will change.

in*the*red_6

johanne wrote:

I know im lucky to live in a 2 bed house by myself.. but my income is coming down to £650 a month this week as im going back to work part time due to health problems so im having to really cut back and possibly move into a rougher part of the city in a bedsit or something!

Hi, couldn't you rent your spare room out to a friend/lodger to generate some more income and avoid having to do this?

johanne

i could... BUT i dont have many mates (*cue violins*.. hehe ) and those that i have and am close enough to and like enough to even consider inviting to live with me either:

a/ cant afford to move in or
b/dont want to move in

Wouldnt wanna get a stranger to move in either cos im a very private person and sounds silly but id be worried about a stranger ruining my stuff! Think Monica from friends.. but more of a loner.. i enjoy being on my own too much to have someone live with me!

Add to that a very recent incident where i found out someone i cared about very very much had betrayed my trust on so many levels lied through his teeth and was basically a con man. Im finding it really hard to trust anyone right now.. even the people closest to me. So inviting someone to live with me seems out of the question.

p.s. Apologises for highjacking the thread!

System

black-saturn wrote:

I think thats just a teenage problem. Teenagers are awkward. When they reach their 20's I think you'll find they will change.

My son is 24 and if anything hes got worse