She didnt go to CCCS

saffronflowers

Nothing really to add just wanted you to know that I was thinking of you today - best of luck

SFx

jackie_w

Hi guys,

Well Ive just had a massive argument on the phone with my sister, so, im not going down to see her when the guy comes. She read out some of the things that were on the paper work, and one of the things were something along the lines of asking a family member about buying equity in her home, or something, and I asked her how much that was, and she said she didnt know. I told her that thats what I was telling her, and she might have to sell her home at the end if she wasnt able to come up with the funds. She kept butting in when I was trying to explain things to her, and then I asked her to call Debt Help Scotland, because they were the ones that told me that the trustee could tell her to sell her home at the end of the term, she said that it wouldnt and that was why she was protecting the trust. she started shouting and crying saying that she was too busy to do that, her house was a mess, she wasnt feeling well, she wasnt sleeping and I was starting to get on her nerves because I kept getting at her, and then hung up on me, so, im not going down, she can deal with it herself, and at the end of the term if there is any equity in her house, and she has to find money to "buy" it, then she can look elsewhere because I wont be paying it.

I phoned my mum and told her what happened, and I asked her to call Debt Help Scotland and ask them, and she did, and they said the same thing, they would have to make sure it was in writing, that the trustee wouldnt come back at the end of the term and ask for any future equity in the house.
Ive told my mum that i will lend my sister the £1000, and she will pay me money back every month, im not going to wait until she has the total amount, so, ive told her to tell my sis if she wants the money she can have it, so the ball is in her court now. My mum said according to the man they spoke to yesterday at Money Matters, there is only 2 options for her and that is a trust deed or bankrupcy!!!!

ive done all I can do, and ive tried to help, but, i feel as if ive just had it thrown back in my face with her saying im getting on her nerves, and that she feels im keeping on at her, so, im not helping her again.

Thanks everyone for your advice, I feel as if not only has my time been wasted but yours has too, and for that im really really sorry

Jackie

scaredy_cat

you're not responsible for the mess your sister got her self into and you're not responsible for sorting it out.

ajaney

You have done everything humanly possible to help your sister. She still hasnt had her full Lightbulb Moment in my opinion. Anyone else would be thanking their lucky stars to have a sister like you, trying to help her. One day, she will look back & wish she had accepted your help & advice.

saffronflowers

You have wasted nobodys time hun, - I am still very worried about you lending her the £1000, I dont think that you will see it back. Personally I think you should tell your sister that you love her, you will emotionally support her but there is nothing more practically that you can do for her.

I think deep down that she things that this is a quick fix, rather than facing up to what has got her to this situation.

Big hug and remember you have been the best sister anyone could ask for.

SFx

GeorgeUK

If your mother is up to making another phone call and it's not too late, it may be worth contacting the Scottish branch of CCCS to enquire about a DAS - so she knows what it is and may be able to persuade your sister if it is of use.
http://www.scottishdebtline.co.uk/contact/contact.htm

Hope it all works out.
George

Edit: If you are not going to the metteing, make sure your mother has a copy of the questions you listed.

milliemonster

Hi Jackie, I just wanted to say I am thinking of you this morning, please don't beat yourself up about this, you really have been an amazing tower of strength for your sister and one day she will realise that.

You have done all you can now, she will have to now make her own mistakes and live by them

let us know how it goes when you hear back from your sis

sclyates

jackie_w wrote: »

Hi There,

I posted the other week to say that my sis was having problems, and that she had made an appointment with the CCCS, but also, she had contacted a company (cant remember their name), who were an insolvency practitioner.

Well, the CCCS were meant to contact her yesterday, and this guy from the insolvency company was coming to see her yesterday too. I told her to speak to them both, but, she cancelled the appointment with the CCCS, and only spoke to this guy. So, he is coming back to see her on Friday to get all the paper work signed. To be honest, the guy did say to her that he didnt think it would be best for him to come back so soon, and that she should also seek advice from another party to make sure that she was getting the best advice for her situation, but, she said she doesnt have time for that, and needs to get it sorted this week as she is off work.

The guy said that she should consider protecting the equity in her house (at the moment, there is no equity on her home as its mortgaged to the max), but, she should do this incase the housing market picks up, and she ends up with equity within the next 3 years, that way, her creditors cant try to claim the equity. He has said it will cost approximately £1000 to do this (he did say this was a rough figure, but, it could end up more or less). Is this right, is this what she would have to do? He said wherever she gets the £1000, it has to be seen as a gift because whoever gives it to her will have to write a letter basically saying they have given it to her as a gift etc, so guess who has been asked to give it to her ........me.

He also said that they could take her car off her because this will be seen as an asset. She has told him that she needs her car to get her to and from work as there is no public transport that will take her anywhere near her place of work, but, he has told her that her creditors will not look at it in this way.

He asked her if she had anything on hire purchase and she told him no, however, she then said to me "oh i forgot to tell him about the tv (which her ex husband has), and the fridge freezer which im paying back every month, and is in my name. I told her that they would be classed as hire purchase, and i thought that the companies could actually come and take the items back, but, she said thats rubbish and they cant do that!!!!! She also said that hire purchase is for things that you have hired, but, I dont think this is correct. She said they cant take the tv anyway because her ex has it, and she doesnt, but, Ive said if im correct, and they do want to reposses the tv, she will need to get it back off of her ex. Would this be right?

Does anyone know if what he has told her is correct? Im really worried for her, and have constantly told her that I dont think she should just take his advice, and she should speak to someone else, but, my advice is falling on deaf ears.

Can anyone tell me what the likelyhood is of them taking her car?
If they do take her car from her, then guess who she is going to ask to give her money, yip me. Ive obviously spoken to my husband about this, because ive had to tell him that we have been asked to give her a loan of the £1000 to protect the equity on her house", Ive also said to him about her car, and said that I think we will be asked to give her a loan of money should her creditors take her car off her, and his reply was "well we are not a bank, she will just have to use public transport, or come to some sort of arrangement with her ex and he can run her up and down to work", her ex is a taxi driver.

Im obiously very worried about her situation, and I know that there is no way she will go and speak to someone else about it for her. Im really just wondering if what this guy has said is correct.

Jacki

tell her to go to the CAB

trancebabe

Aww Jackie...

... you just can't help some people can you!! At the end of it all I think she's hoping that someone will just magic her problems away and life's just not like that.

you tried your best - it's worth one last shot from your Mum as George has suggested but really... there's nothing more you can do if your sis is more worried about the state of her house than the state of her finances.

I hope it all works out and she wakes up in time!
xx

coolcait

Hiya jackie

It sounds like you had a really emotional morning - I hope you're feeling OK in yourself (hugs).

You've done a great job in supporting your sister - even if she doesn't realise it herself yet. And I can understand a little bit why she was on about her house being a mess - it's an area where she can see how to sort things out by herself (I am appalled by my own hypocrisy in saying that, as I look around me :eek: ). Plus, if the trustee's coming to visit, there's probably the whole 'houseproud' thing going on.

It doesn't excuse how she spoke to you. However, you know her better than we do, so all of these things have probably occurred to you.

I won't try to answer your other questions just now, because I guess that more 'debt' stuff is the last thing you need right now. I'm happy to give whatever answers I can any time you, or anyone else, has a question.

For now though, take care of yourself, and I hope things settle down for you now.