Teetering on brink of bankruptcy....should I jump??!

Mercian_2

Hello all....
Now that I suspect that worry about money is threatening my health, I thought it time to finally consider bankruptcy....
A bad relationship has caused my problems...my ex had a string of affairs (going away for days under the guise of 'work') to the point where I was off sick from work just to look after our baby. Eventually she had me thrown from my house (rented in my name only) by the police so she could move her boyfriend in. All you have to do is allege assault it seems! I have made a complaint about the police but their investigator and their investigator has finally finished his enquiry...without even bothering to interview the witnesses.
Thousands of pounds later in legal fees, my son was with me (my ex didnt even contest the residency application in the end...it was fully supported by the Health Visitor) My son has not seen his mother for a year...and he's only 2.
I owe 20K now....and will be paying it off in about 4 years. Given that bankruptcy is discharged in 5 years (if I understand it right) would that be better??? I'm not behind in anything yet but thats because I live on toast and baked beans...
I have no family and no one to support or help....feel very alone. Any opinion would be appreciated.

shadowdragon

Firstly welcome to the Bankruptcy board, sorry to hear about your troubles.

Bankruptcy is 1 year then your are discharged, if a IPA is implemented that can run for 3 years and your credit score is knackered for 6 years afterwards.

Your first port of call is to one of the debt charities CAB Nat Debt Helpline or CCCS links are available in stickes at the top, they are the ones that need to give you sound professional advice. The boards are for guidance im afraid and hold no weight with the judge or OR.

Put up a Statement of Affairs so everyone can see where you are solvency/insolvent wise.

Chin up

Shadowdragon.

tinybabysteps

Hello Mercian, welcome to the boards. You have come to the right place so try not to feel alone. I am no expert having only joined myself a couple of weeks ago but let me tell you everyone here is very friendly and helpful.
Firstly you need to contact one of the debt charity helplines, I called National Debt Direct but a lot of people here also recommend CCCS. They were very helpful.

I am sure that someone else will be along soon who can give you better advice than me.

Well done on taking the first step.

imcognito

Hi Mercian,

What a tough time you had with your ex. You are doing a remarkable job with your baby (well toddler now time flies eh!). I am sure you will get lots of advice here, Im pretty new to this too, not gone BR yet but should be soon so i am still learning.

But I do know what its like to be a single parent and for baby to have no contact with the other parent.. I was there too.

Lots of Luck with everything

Im xx

peachyprice

Hi Mercian, welcome to the forum.
Reading your post it sounds as if you are renting your home, so you have nothing to lose by going BR, it will all be over in a year and you and your son will be able to live a happy debt free life together.

It's admirable when people do struggle on and do the best they can to pay their debts back, but when it effects your health and family there comes a time when you just have to call it a day and do what is best yourself, not your creditors.

There will always be someone here to answer any questions, many members have come here feeling so alone, and as if their world is at an end, but there's so much support here and always someone to share the burden with, so please stick around and we'll support you as best we can if you decide bankrputcy is the best option for you and your son.

In the meantime have a chat with one of the debt charities, they'll help you see a way forward.

dalip

Hi Merc and a very very warm welcome to you.

Anything you want to get off your chest you can here,even if it is not directly debt related,although most things are. Fair play for bringing up your child on your own. As the others have said have a chat to one of the debt charities. If they reccomend a DMP hop over to the DFW board as we do sometimes interlink with them and they can be just as nice as us when they try:rotfl: .If the debt charity says bc, then all the answers to any questions you may have will be answered by someone here. We do our utmost to support and listen and advise, to all posters who come here. So keep posting and we will hold your hand through all of the ups and downs on the road to bc and freedom.Dx

Sorry if that was a bit soppy:o

Thejagman

Hi Mercian

Firstly if your money situation is affecting your health there can be no question as to the right thing to do, just jump mate and be bloody quick about it.

The consequences of BR against your health and ultimately that of your son is not even worth thinking about, the BR must win every tick of the clock.

I started to have fits of low mood, used to get very tearfull, I would be sitting at the traffic lights and a thought of my situation would float accross my mind and bingo I would be in floods. Then it was chest pains, not sleeeping or eating properly.

After the event which turned out to be nowhere near as bad as I imagined, life got better very quickly. My discharge was automatic on 18.09.2008

Once your BR just keep working towards the DD and take good care of the smaller person.

Good luck

The Jagman

Dorothy56

Hi

I am still in the throes of going bankrupt and I have to say the support and advice I've had from people here has been absolutely amazing.

Only one of the debt charities can give you advice about whether to go bankrupt, but looking at your situation the most important thing is that you stay fit, healthy AND happy for your little one. Also they soon become not so little ones very quickly and cost a fortune.

Whatever decision you make the folks here will be the most fantastic support you could ever want.

All the very best

Dorothy

Mercian_2

Update.......
Hadn't appreciated extent of debt before....£27,000.
Bring home £1,400/month after tax (£16,800/year).
Single working parent of 2 year old...5 year old to a previous r/ship...paying £230/month maintenance.
Rent of £360/month but desperate to move from this area...
CCCS organised DMP of £227/month for the next decade...I am 39 at the moment.
What would anyone else do???

dreamcatcher73

10 years?? Personally I'd take the leap..

I went BR on the 25th Feb, total debts of £27,000 and was told it would take me at least 15 years to pay them off, I didn't hesitate in jumping..

But, everyone is different and you need to think it through and make sure you are aware of all the implications of BR and what it entails and then make your decision.

This forum is a great place to find info that may be relevant to you and if you have a question then just ask, everyone has been so helpful and friendly to me, it has made the whole process so much easier

Good luck with whatever you decide

philnicandamy

Mercian I'd agree with dreamcatcher (ignore the delightful broken hearted she must have had a bad day...we love her to bits really ) at the end of the day only you can decide on the best course of action to take....we can help you anyway we can but as dreamcatcher said you need to look at all the implications of bankruptcy its not such a "quick fix" as people think...i've been nearly 2yrs bankrupt now & still getting over the feelings with it