Feel numb...

mother_hen_2

Mrs Tine thankyou for that I thought people would say oh my god, what on earth have u been doing when they heard the amount - I will post it shortly, OH just coming in and wants to look first (hopefully ammend the figures a bit)

MrsTinks

It's what we're here for chuck (ok ok so that was a shameless bad pun but thought you could do with a smile! )
Yes it might seem bad and probably even worse on paper - but you know what? It's only money! Honestly! Not that long ago on here we all got a very sharp wake up call when a regular poster suddenly lost her partner. I think it reminded us all that it's only money... yeah it's important and needs to be dealt with but at the end of the day it just seemed so insignificant compared to loosing a loved one.
I'm glad your husband is helping you out - having both of you on the same sheet makes our lives in resolving things so much easier
As for the Oh my god what have you spent it on - don't worry - we ARE going to be coming to that eventually
why? Because we need to understand how the debt was run up to help prevent it happening again and to break the pattern If you don't change your spending habits if that is what caused the problem then anything else is just band aids
But that's secondary - first we need the soa

milliemonster

Mother Hen, nobody on this forum are going to judge you on how much debt you have, even if it was a million it doesn't matter, what matters is that we're all here to support each other and help each other find ways through it. You've made the very first brave step and the worst thing about having debt is you feel like you are the only one in the world, but when you look at all the boards on this forum and how many threads there are in each one, look at the DFW thread total, that should tell you just how many of us have debts we can't control and are looking for help.

You have nothing to be ashamed of, the hardest part is finding the strength to take control of the situation, let this now be a turning point, life is bloody hard and it is too short to waste letting this get the better of you.

Have a look at the Bankruptcy board, I'm not saying that this is the option that is right for you by any means but I think for any of us that are in debt even considering the thought of BR scares you silly, but I often go on there to read how people are coping in this situation and it's amazing really how many of the posters on there have started out in desperate situations and been so scared, but things do get better, even if they have had to go bankrupt. If that happens to you, it won't be the end of the world as scary as it may seem.

I wish you all the best and please don't be ashamed, you have nothing to fear from us daft lot on here xx

Happytogetdebtfree

Hi mother hen, dont give up always keep positive we will all get through this tough time.... i have 77 k of debt not including mortagae and im 24 but this is a joint amount with oh who is 30 im getting rid of my debt before we start a family when you have taken the first steps you start to feel much better about things in four months ive noticed a real change in how we manage things and its really made a big difference xx