Scared - don't know what to do

ginvzt

Sorry, I forgot to say the most important thing!!!

CONGRATULATIONS!!!

I understand what you are saying about giving the best home for the baby. We are trying for a baby and although no success as yet, I am trying to put some money aside each month to be able to get things for the baby I would like, and we are going to view a house to rent tomorrow (it just looks so perfect from the pictures - and from description it seems to have plenty of room for us and the baby and parents visits - both parents live abroad). I know babies can be very inexpensive, but I want to give all the best I can! Enjoy the pregnancy and don't stress - everything will sort itself out.

Penpop

ginvzt wrote: »

Sorry, I forgot to say the most important thing!!!

CONGRATULATIONS!!!

I understand what you are saying about giving the best home for the baby. We are trying for a baby and although no success as yet, I am trying to put some money aside each month to be able to get things for the baby I would like, and we are going to view a house to rent tomorrow (it just looks so perfect from the pictures - and from description it seems to have plenty of room for us and the baby and parents visits - both parents live abroad). I know babies can be very inexpensive, but I want to give all the best I can! Enjoy the pregnancy and don't stress - everything will sort itself out.

Thank you so much, and I really hope everything turns out perfect for you! xx

Penpop

I have included my SOA which I thought may give you a better idea.

Statement of Affairs and Personal Balance Sheet

Monthly Income Details
Monthly income after tax................ 750
Partners monthly income after tax....... 930
Benefits................................ 0
Other income............................ 0 Sometimes when we both work on Saturdays we could have an extra £80 a week, but as we are only required to work some Saturdays I havent included it, I have treated it as a bonus instead if that makes sense
Total monthly income.................... 1680

Monthly Expense Details
Mortgage................................ 0
Secured loan repayments................. 0
Rent.................................... 500
Management charge (leasehold property).. 0
Council tax............................. 0 inc in rent
Electricity............................. 0 inc in rent
Gas..................................... 0
Oil..................................... 0 inc in rent
Water rates............................. 0 inc in rent
Telephone (land line)................... 0 inc in rent
Mobile phone............................ 50 this is for 2 contract phones, we cannot get out of these until Jan09, which will be doing and going over to PAYG
TV Licence.............................. 0 inc in rent
Satellite/Cable TV...................... 0 we have free view
Internet Services....................... 0 inc in rent
Groceries etc. ......................... 150
Clothing................................ 0
Petrol/diesel........................... 150 this is the maximum we would spend
Road tax................................ 30 this is for 2 cars
Car Insurance........................... 35 this is for 2 cars
Car maintenance (including MOT)......... 15 again, 2 cars
Car parking............................. 0
Other travel............................ 0
Childcare/nursery....................... 0
Other child related expenses............ 0
Medical (prescriptions, dentist etc).... 5 don't save this atm but should start - would only be for the dentist
Pet insurance/vet bills................. 0
Buildings insurance..................... 0
Contents insurance...................... 0
Life assurance ......................... 0
Other insurance......................... 0
Presents (birthday, christmas etc)...... 20 don't actually save this atm but would be a good idea to start I guess
Haircuts................................ 0
Entertainment........................... 0
Holiday................................. 0
Emergency fund.......................... 100 thats my savings that come straight from my bank account, some times its more than £100
Total monthly expenses.................. 1055

Assets
Cash.................................... 550 my current savings
House value (Gross)..................... 0
Shares and bonds........................ 0
Car(s).................................. 13500 2 cars
Other assets............................ 0
Total Assets............................ 14050

No Secured Debt

Unsecured Debts
Description....................Debt......Monthly...APR
Barclaycard....................2992.05...67........29.9 aim to pay atleast £100
Virgin Card....................850.......25........0 £70 p/month - 14 months 2 go
Mint Card......................750.......17........0 £70 p/month - 11 months 2 go
Car Finance....................6443.5....184.1.....0 34 months 2 go
Barclay Loan...................1050......220.......15 finishes in Feb09
Egg Card.......................450.......20........0 £45 p/month -12 mnths 2go
Total unsecured debts..........12535.55..533.1.....-

Monthly Budget Summary
Total monthly income.................... 1,680
Expenses (including secured debts)....... 1,055
Available for debt repayments........... 625
Monthly UNsecured debt repayments....... 533.1
Surplus(deficit if negative)............ 91.9

Personal Balance Sheet Summary
Total assets (things you own)........... 14,050
Total Secured debt...................... -0
Total Unsecured debt.................... -12,535.55
Net Assets.............................. 1,514.45

Created using the SOA calculator at https://www.makesenseofcards.com.
Reproduced on Moneysavingexpert with permission.

So we actually pay more than the £450 than I said, its £530, but that £91.90 that is 'left over' never seems to be - i've never seen it.

RoxieW

Find the cheapest (safe) place to rent that you can. Dont be fussy about the 'perfect' house or area at this stage. There's plenty of time for that when you're back on your feet financially. When we had ds1 we rented a tiny 2 bed terrace in an ethnic minority area (well, we were the minority being white lol) where they house lots of asylum seekers. There was also a centre for drug addicts a few minutes away and my OH encountered the odd prostitute walking through the park. Sounds ridiculously bad now but in all honesty we never encountered any trouble. We kept ourselves to ourselves and this allowed me to stay home with baby and my OH to continue with his studies. We got by on part time jobs and student loans. Fast forward 18 mths and we'd saved enough to be able to move into our own new 3 bed semi in a lovely, quiet cul de sac. I have no regrets. Our baby wasnt the slightest bit bothered where we lived at that age - just that he had a roof over his head. He also wasnt bothered in the slightest by his second hand cot or the fact we didnt have a car etc.
Dont get caught up in wanting things to be perfect for the baby - he'll have you and that's the main thing. Things will be perfect in the future but right now you just need to be able to get by.
If you give up work can you give up the car? Phone sky/broadband and tell them you cant afford it an ask what your options are. They may be able to do something. Remember you'll get child benefit and tax credits - go to entitledto.com and see what you will get.
If you want to post up your SOA (incoming and outgoings) we may be able to help you further.

JC-P

I think you've had some really good advice so far, hopefully you feel much less scared now.

Congratulations too by the way

RoxieW

The first thing that strikes me is that you're wages are both quite low for 40 hour weeks. Could your OH look for a better paid job? I dont know whether you'd prefer to work or stay at home but if you stayed at home could you possibly go to evening classes to enable you to improve your situation in the future. We found that we were no better off financially when I worked. I'd definately put a few different scenarios into entitled to to see what you will get tax credits wise should you a) work or b) stay home - then you can make a decision based on what your financial situation will be when baby arrives.
I'd also look at getting rid of one or both cars. They're a luxury that we cant afford with an annual income of 40K. Can OH get a bus pass or a bike? Or ideally - look for a better paid job closer to home
Dont panic - look in what your SOA will be realistically when baby is here ie with the lowest rent you can find/utitlites etc outgoing and with tax credits incoming - then you may get a clearer picture of the situation rather than fearing the very worst.

ginvzt

Your income doesn't seem high - go to entitled to to check if you can claim any benefits. Don't forget, you would also might be entitled to some more support when you are on maternity leave.

Unsecured Debts
Description....................Debt......Monthly.. .APR
Barclaycard....................2992.05...67....... .29.9 aim to pay atleast £100
Virgin Card....................850.......25........0 £70 p/month - 14 months 2 go
Mint Card......................750.......17........0 £70 p/month - 11 months 2 go
Car Finance....................6443.5....184.1.....0 34 months 2 go
Barclay Loan...................1050......220.......15 finishes in Feb09
Egg Card.......................450.......20........0 £45 p/month -12 mnths 2go
Total unsecured debts..........12535.55..533.1.....-

When the 0% runs out on virgin, mint and egg? Is it 14, 11 and 12 months? If so, pay the minimum on those for now and put all the money you can in barclaycard as 29.9% APR is way too much!!! I am not sure of the correct calculation, but even by paying back £100 a month will take you about 4 years to repay it!!!!!!!

Try the calculator here:
http://www.moneysavingexpert.com/cards/minimum-repayments-credit-card

If I get it right, you could be putting at least £225 a month in that card and it would pay it off much sooner and save you loads of interest. Just keep paying the minimum on 0% cards. Then, once the loan is finished, use those money to pay off the other cards and some more of the barclaycard. That would be my way to start!!!

MrsTinks

OK first of all I agree - I think your income is very low for the hours you both do... Have either of you tried to get pay rises and/or new jobs? If you have then one or both of you might need to think about 2nd jobs before the babby arrives to clear these debts and give a higher monthly available amount once the debts are gone to avoid the hole getting any deeper. And STOP taking on ANYONE elses debt for any reason what so ever! I'm sure that right now the world is a rosy place and you love each other but things happen and sometimes people break up... then they end up on here with thousands of debt left them in THEIR name because OH has !!!!!!ed off... It might not happen to you but that doesn't mean you should risk it!
Right back to business... IF you can't get better paid job then once the baby arrives I think you might actually be better off staying at home and getting shot of your car... Your income as a household is low enough...
Personally I couldn't do it and I don't think it's a solution you should rely on as I really don't agree with living off benefits if you are fit to work... but it might be necessary if you start struggling to feed all 3 of you etc.

Having a baby is not easy I'm sure - I'm pregnant with my first too - but if need be then your OH will have to take on a second job in the long term and you might need to think about taking a night job stacking shelves in Tesco when the baby arrives so your OH can mind the little one and you can still bring some money in.

ginvzt

I don't think it is wise for OP to change job now as he wouldn't be entitled to SMP, only, possibly, maternity allowance. I think it is a bad idea to change jobs while pregnant - you cannot be fired because of the pregnancy, but the employer can come up with other reason, especially in probation. Trying to get payrise, if you can, in my opinion is better solution. If not - you just with what you can.

Penpop

Thanks to everyone who has replied. I will have to snowball the different ways to work out which is the more cheaper way.

As for work - we both work for my dads business, neither of us have qualifications in our jobs and it was more of a favour to give us jobs tbh. We both work some saturdays, as mentioned before OH is only required to work certain Saturdays and I work most saturdays - only a little cleaning job but every little helps.

Getting rid of the car(s) is not an option im afraid, ive only just got the car and I like to have a car so that I know I've got freedom if I ever need to get away, we live in Cornwall and I don't think Ive ever seen a bus! lol And plus, I dont want to get rid of my car becuz of OH debts - that doesnt seem fair to me.

I know that I shouldnt have taken on his debts but I was so stressed of him getting charged so much interest etc that it just seemed easier at the time.

xx